« Gifts For Guys With Imagination | Main | Four Man Tent My Ass! »
Random: Donald Rumsfeld Is In My Dreams
Posted December 29, 2006 2:57 PM
And he hates me. I need some help with dream analysis, folks: I had a nightmare last night that I was back in high school or maybe college (or law school, the scene of many real-life nightmares for me), prepping for a standardized test. I went up to the professor to get my test form and it was, guess who, the Rummy himself. I got a test form from him, went back to my desk to take the test, and then realized that it was someone else's form. Not only that, but they'd already done the test! So, I brought it back up to him and asked for my form instead. He peered at me with those beady little eyes, took the old, used form, and then told me I already had mine. I went back to my desk (again) and searched everywhere.
That's when it got weird. I couldn't find the form. So I went back to Professor Rumsfeld and asked him for a new one. In his best press-conference voice, he informed me that he knew what I was trying to do, and he doesn't look kindly on cheating and no, I couldn't have another form. And, if he had to come to my desk to get my form, he'd yank my pants down in front of the class. [before you read too much into that last, that's a joking punishment I play on my 4- and 6-year-old daughter and son. If they can't find something that I know is right in front of them, I tell them "OK, I'll help, but if I find it I'm pulling your pants down." Which leads to lots of giggling and redoubled search efforts on their part, and lets me stay in my chair.] So, I went back and looked again. This time I found the damned form, in my backpack. I'd swear it wasn't there before. Then I went back to tell the Professor Rumsfeld (it cracks me up to say that) that I found it. But he's up in the bleachers (those weren't there before) talking to Dick Cheney about all the cheaters in his class. Help? Anyone?
