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Random: Great Gifts For Him - Stay Out Of Jail!
Posted March 20, 2007 2:16 PM
I suddenly realize that my everyday life is blog-worthy beyond just writing witty gifts for men reviews for your pleasure. After rolling a satisfying 196 in my bowling leauge last night, I was enjoying myself immensely and happily buying drinks for my boys on team Thunderstroke after we thoroughly destroyed the Cheesycakes. I was all smiles on my long drive home too. Now I'm very careful with my drink consumption as it's a long drive from bowling alley to home. I kept myself at a cop safe 72 mph so as to not risk getting pulled over. This strategy has kept me out of trouble for the past three bowling seasons, and again, I'm always careful not to overdo it with the sauce.
Technorati Tags: bowling, d.w.i., drunk drivers, gifts for men
All was going smoothly except for that big ass semi that was going slower than a 3-legged turtle in my lane. I clicked my blinker, sped up a bit and jetted around him in plenty of time to make my exit. Bad move. I saw the lights and heard the siren before I ever made it down the off-ramp. Two highway patrol officers, one female, said, "Sir I don't like the way you're driving." My quick witted response to this was, "Neither does my mother." The cops didn't think it was so funny. "Sir, have you been drinking?" - "Uh huh...but not a lot." Anyway, there I was on the side of the road, standing on one foot, tilting my head back closing my eyes and knowing a breathalizer was in the near future and pretty sure my wife would be getting a call from me from the can. Long story short, I passed the sobriety tests - kind of - and passed the breathalizer test too - it was too close for comfort, but I was under the legal limit...(thank the Big Man upstairs that I declined a third drink.) After they said I was free to go, I asked if the ticket would be for speeding or an unsafe lane change and I was hoping for the former. In what can only be described as dumb shi$house luck they let me go with a warning...and a freaking smile. True story. It's made for great office banter all day and I wanted to share it with you all. They even gave me the tip of the breathalizer for a souvenir. On a side note...the only drinking I'll be doing henceforth is from a can of diet Coke.