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October 30, 2008

Get Him In The Game

Whether he was a benchwarmer in high school or the star of the team, he is going to love our latest new entry at the Guyville Store.

All of our Licensed Sports Signs were designed to bring him as close as possible to his favorite sports heroes and, of course, nothing is more personal than the mens' locker room. If he loves Brett Favre, then he'll love having his name of the back of his favorite team's jersey hanging next to his hall of famer pal. The signs are nicely framed and take realism to a whole new level. In addition to the locker room signs, we have Pub Signs with his name emblazoned as Pub owner of his favorite team's local watering hole.

It's that holiday time for giving again, so why not give him something that he'll really like. No...we mean, really really like. I'd add in a third "really" but Guyville readers are smart and get the point, if not my wicked sense of humor. Seriously, though...really really (really) he's going to flip when he opens this for the holidays. This gift is so ridiculously awesome...that when I look at mine, hanging up in my office, I can almost remember catching a Favre 'over-the-shoulder' pass in the end zone. And then I look down at my belly, sigh, and eat another Snickerdoodle.

For other great gifts for men ideas, go snoop around our Guyville personalized guy gifts store. You'll understand why we truly are the kings of gifts for guys.

October 26, 2008

Buy American?...Now More Than Ever!

I began watching Ford's stock before all of this downward spiraling hullabaloo. I saw it as it dipped below five dollars and I said, "Almost time to buy." On Friday it dipped below $2.00. If I had any doubts about picking up this stock at such a bargain, I was inspired by a recent article written by Warren Buffet in "The New York Times." The title of his article was "Buy American. I Am." I've been thinking more and more about the importance of buying not just American stocks, but American products as well. If I'm facing facts, American automakers haven't given us too many great products the past couple of decades, and foreign automakers have rightfully blown past us. That's all likely going to change and change soon. Ford has three new electric cars on the horizon, and Chevy has the Volt due out in 2010, which I blogged about recently. One of the things that Buffet reminded us of in his article was his famously coined phrase (which makes a ton of sense right now),

Buffet says: "A simple rule dictates my buying: Be fearful when others are greedy, and be greedy when others are fearful."

While Buffet tells us that he cannot predict what the market will do in the short term - and of course, if he can't you know I can't. He feels that in the next 5 to 10 to 20 years you will see most companies setting new profit records. And while my opinions are my own and any suggestions I make should not lead anyone to make any financial decisions, I like what opportunities are out there for us to seize. I'll leave you with one more Buffetism:

"I'll follow the lead of a restaurant that opened in an empty bank building and then advertised: "Put your mouth where your money was." Today my money and my mouth both say equities."

October 22, 2008

Guyville in US Weekly

Guyville's gifts for men has officially hit the big time. Fine, we're exaggerating, but we find our cool print ad in US, one of the most widely read publications, pretty exciting. Whether we sell a thousand of these handsome, personalized glassware units next week or fifty thousand, we'll be ready as we always are. So keep an eye on next week's US Weekly - 11/3/08 issue on sale 10/24/08. We're also putting twenty selected items on sale in our Guyville Store to really kick off holiday gift giving. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it is holiday shopping time. In light of the current economic woes, we think you'll love not only our 20% off sale items, but our pricing structure in general.

Here is a bit about our "Great Gastbyesque" Personalized Drinking Glasses. They are unique. They are well constructed, with a hefty and durable base. They, like all of our guy gifts, are personalized. If you can't personalized it, we don't carry it. That rule may get broken someday, but for now you can be sure that all of our hundreds of gift items can be uniquely personalized with his name. No where else will you find such a selection at more aggressive prices. Okay...enough tooting of our own horns. You go shop now, and then you can toot our horn for us. Deal? Can I get a 'honk honk?"

October 20, 2008

Joe The Gifts for Men Giver

Haven't we heard enough of Joe the Plumber the past two weeks? Yeah, yeah, we're fighting for you, Joe. We're going to lower your taxes, Joe. We're going to furnish your home and pay off your credit card debt, Joe. Hey Joe, we're going to clothe your kids and buy you a Mercedes Benz too. Bla bla bla...whatever will buy your vote, Joe. My good friend put it best when he said, "One of them quite possibly represents more of the last eight years, and the other will inspire me as he rapes me with taxes." Thank goodness all we really know over here is guy gifts. Personalized gifts for men, well, that we can do and do well, regardless of who emerges victorious in the upcoming election.

We'd like to actually do something useful for you, Joe the every-man-plumber-father-taxpayer-regular guy. We'd like to do what we do best and that is show you some of our favorite, Joe Regular Guy Gifts.

Joe Gift #1: The Personalized Lockback Knife: This is an extremely popular gift for it's usefulness, sleek design, and of course, it's personalized.

Joe Gift #2: Democrat or Republican steak brands. Now you can make your statement and enjoy spirited debates over finely cooked steaks. What can be better than that?

Joe Gift #3: Personalized House of Cards Poker Set: When things are the toughest for folks financially, playing a casual game of poker with the guys takes on an entirely new meaning, especially when the stakes are for baby's new pair of shoes...literally!

Why we can't predict who is going to win in this most tumultuous and bizarre election year, we can at least offer up the latest, greatest, and most useful Regular Joe gifts at our Regular Joe Guyville store.

October 16, 2008

The Ultimate Self Defense

Krav Maga is the ultimate in self defense. I once interviewed a Krav Maga instructor. She was a wisp of a woman weighing no more than 115 lbs soaking wet and probably no taller than five feet five inches. I asked her how on earth it would be possible for her to defend herself against a 220 pound man who put a gun to her head. She very specifically said to me that if he was putting the gun to her head, he was through. I said, "I don't believe you." In a moment straight out of the Matrix I said to Vivian... "Show me." So she brought over another instructor, and sure enough he went about 220 pounds. Within about 5 seconds, she put a series of moves on the guy, that completely disarmed him. As if that wasn't bad enough, she took the gun away and had the weapon pointed at him. She went from victim to having complete control before he could yell, "oh crap!"

They have similar moves to disarm a knife to the throat. Oh, and if a scumbag tries to rape a woman who has been trained in the Israeli art of Krav Maga self defense, he'll be a nutless bag of jelly in two point two seconds. Karate is great. Kung Fu is cool. Boxing has its place in history too, but in the world we live in now, there is something to be said for being deadly with your hands. Krav isn't pretty like martial arts. In fact it's not a martial art at all. Krav Maga literally targets the soft and most vulnerable parts of the body. Hey bad guy, go ahead and try to attack when your intended victim just slammed you in the larynx and the groin.

We're a gifts for men site to be sure, but it's October, and the Dodgers just lost to the Phillies yesterday. So we're fighting mad! Tomorrow I introduce my five year-old girl to Krav Maga. I'll let you know how it goes.

October 14, 2008

Regular Guy Schools NBA Star

This is what Guyville is all about. We basketball nuts have played countless games against the clock, against ourselves, against our friends, and have always had the dream that we were playing against an NBA star. In the above video, a normal, short, skinny dude wearing a v-neck sweater has his way in a game of one-on-one against New Jersey Nets star, Devin Harris. Not only does he school an NBA star, but he crosses him over in the worst way possible. I'd love to tell you that Harris was just loafing, but he wasn't. He was defensively dialed in, and this dude, Stuart Tanner, wearing a pair of denim jeans no less, took him to school. After watching this video (about 6 times) I have now, however, become a Devin Harris fan. That's because he did what I wouldn't expect a just-humiliated-hoops-star to do...he paid mad respect to Tanner. "Did you see how fast he was? He just hustled me." Then he warmly congratulated Tanner on his victory. That is class. Oh, and just in case Donald Sterling is listening, sign this dude Tanner up! We need someone good to back up Baron Davis this year, and you let Shaun Livingston go!

For Stuart Tanner, who represents every sixteen year-old varsity hoops playa out there, we give him a big Guyville shout out. You, my friend, are our Guyville stud of the month.

October 13, 2008

Flask Weather Finally!

It's October, folks. As promised, we have our guy gifts recommendations for the fast approaching holidays. We'll make more as the clock trudges forward, but for this blog, we want to talk about what warms the cockles of our heart, FLASKS! Flasks soared in popularity in the 18th century, but originated in the middle ages as people used gutted fruit to store their liquor. Desperate times create amazing ingenuity, right? A coconut would work in a pinch. Makes sense to me. The hip flask was noted for its compactness which was exceedingly useful during prohibition. It fit nicely inside a trouser pocket or a lady's garter belt.

Now that the history lesson is over we invite you to take a look at our top three flasks here at Guyville.

1. The Personalized Croco Leather Flask: This awesomely styled flask not only looks unique, but it also holds 5 ounces of his favorite libation, making this a perfect gifts for men choice.

2. The Green Camouflage Flask: In the 18th century girls would sneak gin to their men on British war ships in their petticoats. This Camouflage flask brings about those memories once again.

3. When the aliens finally land on earth, he'll be able to share his Scotch with them by busting out this futuristic, modern triangular flask. This flask is cool, and most importantly, it holds 6 ounces of his favorite fluid and that's a good thing too, because those aliens can really hold their liquor!

So there you have it. Our top three choices for cool guy gifts in the cool Autumn air drinking season. For more great gifts for men choices, check out our Guyville Store.

October 10, 2008

The Last Great Bachelor is Gone

Let's face it...I don't care what Howard Stern looks like, he can bang whatever 15 on a scale of 1 to 10 that he wants. This has been true for years. He knows it, you know it, and the 15's out there that pine for him know it. That being the case, what is it about Beth Ostrosky that has been able to captivate him and take him away from single-guy-who-can-bang-whoever-he-wants-bliss? None of us really know what happens behind his closed doors and truly it doesn't really matter. Beth might dress him up in Barbie dresses tailor made for six foot five dudes for all we know and it's irrelevant because his on screen/radio persona is all guy all the time, and we at Guyville can get behind that the same way we can get behind most of the women that strip on his show.

Here's the situation, Howard, we need you to do nothing other than stay your course. It's the same course that you've kept your entire career, and in this pinnacle moment in this nation's history, we need nothing that you do to change even a half of an iota. We wish you all the best in your wedded bliss. We hope this lasts forever, bla bla bla. We simply need you to continue being you. We might even need you to kick it up a notch or two in the debauchery department just so we know you haven't lost your touch. Believe me...the economy is crumbling. I can buy Ford stock for the same price as a doughnut. I can name my own price for a lap dance at my local titty joint, but the one thing that absolutely must not change for me/us/guys is one ounce of edge to your show. In fact, I'm going to need someone to shit in a bag, light it on fire and throw it at Ba ba booey next week.

We guys don't want to believe you've been defeated, or settled. Believe me, you are our rock of Gibraltar. You can Tivo "Dancing with the Stars" and Hoff's "America's Got Talent" all you want, you're still the (figurative) John Holmes perpetually for us - (clearly the alive/pre-AIDS John Holmes, but you knew that). We also saw some of our other All Guy All the Time fallen heroes at your wedding. We saw Billy Joel there. We saw Rob Zombie there, and can we bag for a second on that wuss whipped Jerry O'Connell who was forbidden to come to your wedding by his wife, Rebecca? Is he allowed to fire up his Playstation for five minutes while she's on the can, or does the "no playing video games while I'm awake" rule that out too? What a puss. I'm going to tell myself that not only would Beth let you play video games whenever you want, but she'd let you do it while you're on the crapper, after you've just had sex (without cuddling afterward) and she'd be serving you a beer and Pringles while you're at it. Yup. That's why you did it. Beth is off the charts.

Thanks for listening, Howard. You're the best, and Lord knows we need you now more than ever, buddy. Way to keep it real.

-Your Friends here at Guyville

October 9, 2008

Neel Kashkari, Uh...A Little Help Please

Was I the only one who blew out my mouthful of Cheerios when I heard that Neel Kashkari, a former Goldman Sachs executive and merely 35 years old, was to be in charge of the 700 billion dollar bailout? I'm sure this Kashkari is a bright young lad. He graduated from Wharton - the same place as Trump - so I'm sure he knows a few things about dollars and cents. He also helped to develop technology for NASA space science missions such as the James Webb Space Telescope, the replacement program for the Hubble telescope. I get it. Smart young guy, right? Well, one of the problems I have is that I flew by 35 nearly 4 years ago. Your math is correct. I'm almost 39 years old. I know how immature I am! C'mon, I'm older than this guy and I still watch Spongebob Squarepants, and most of the time without my daughter in the room! Seriously, I still laugh uncontrollably when I break wind and I'm older than this guy! Doesn't age bring wisdom? Doesn't he need to respect me because I'm his elder? Now the entire future of the housing market and the U.S. economy is on his shoulders?

Not only was Kashkari born after World War II, he was born after the Vietnam War. He was born right before Ford was president. That wasn't that long ago. That means he was playing kickball when Reagan was President, and was still a teenager when Clinton took office. Holy crap, man! I hope this guy is a prodigy and is off the charts. I hope he's not like young upstart Paul DePodesta who ran the Dodgers into the ground based on his "Moneyball" bible. By the way, DePodesta is now a front office assistant for the San Diego Padres. Not that I'm making any judgmental comparisons.

Sigh...well, Kashkari looks like a boxer to me. He looks like a guy who has had his nose broken a few times, and his shiny bald head makes him look more like an MMA fighter than a nerdy bookworm, so perhaps that is a good omen. Perhaps he'll fight for us, find a solution for us and take us back to a place where we don't crap our pants at the fear of the ATM printing out those three terrifying words, "You're broke sucka!"

October 5, 2008

Just Wait 'Til Next Year...Sigh...Again

Havlicek stole the ball! Havlicek stole the ball! Wait, that's the wrong sport, but it embodied the emotion that ran through the Dodgers and their fans when Broxton threw that piece of dung to Soriano that he somehow swung at to end the 3 game sweep. This is a big surprise for the Cubs since they enjoyed their best season since 1945 winning a league high 97 games. They also dominated the season series between the two teams. So on the one hundred year anniversary of their last world series win, the Cubs seemed poised to make history by winning a World Series title for their loyal and hungry fans. Now, it'll sting more then ever as they enter the cold, cruel winter and tell each other, rather, mumble to each other, "Just wait til' next year."

The weird thing about last night's game was that the Cubs played passionless. It was nearly a foregone conclusion that the Dodgers were going to have their way with them and the fans recognized that early on. Perhaps losing those two home games was an insurmountable problem and deep down they knew it. When you have to walk Manny at inopportune times it treads between strategy and weakness. It's like hacking Shaq in the fourth quarter. Once in a blue moon it will work, but mostly it fails. So the Cubs will have to be satisfied with getting there for now, and they'll have to relish the great strides they made this season, and see what the off season brings.

We here at Guyville would like to commend both teams on their accomplishments, and make some personalized Louisville Slugger recommendations for them to enliven those bats for next season. For more great Major League Baseball gifts for baseball fans, visit our personalized Guyville Store for great guy gifts of all kinds.

October 2, 2008

Runnin With the Devil - Sans Music

We're taking a break from guy gifts for the moment to share with you a most hilarious video. This recording of David Lee Roth singing Runnin' With the Devil without music had us on the floor and we wanted to share it with you. Hats off to GiggleSugar.com for posting this in their blog and commenting on it. I love how some of his screams are full hearted and some are half-hearted. It all sounds great in the song with the music fully mixed, but here, listening to it completely isolated I hear myself saying, "Damn...I could have been a rock star. I should have hit the gym more and practiced those Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks and I could be soakin' in a jacuzzi with my soul mate right now." Of course, no disrespect intended for the great DLR. It's just...well, without the music, more than a little of the magic disappears. "I'm only gonna tell ya one tyyyyymmmme....ahhh, yeah!"

So, go my friends, go and run with the devil for a hair over three minutes. We hope you enjoy as much as we did. We'll get back to the gifts for men blogs soon. We promise.