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Things Every Man Should Know: How to Tie a Tie

Posted January 8, 2010 10:25 AM

As a rite of manhood, you would think that most guys would know how to tie a tie by the time they graduate high school. But unless you and your bros all went to a New England prep school, chances are you haven't the slightest clue. It always surprises me when, on an occasion that requires neck accoutrement, a lot of guys pull out ties that have been tied ONCE years ago by their fathers and then hung noose-like in their closets, ready and waiting for their next opportunity. I get the efficiency factor but... I mean. Come on.

There are some really nifty ways to tie ties out there and the guys at TieKnot.comhave the best how-to images to help you out. You have no excuse.

Tie Knots Every Man Should Know

The Four-in-Hand - the most basic and classic tie knot. It can be used with nearly every tie and fits well in the collar of a shirt.

Four in Hand Tie Knot



















The Windsor- A more complicated knot that the Four-in-Hand, this guy is fat and designed to make a statement. Not that if your Windsor isn't symmetrical, or if the knot is too big for your collar, you are going to look like a fool.

Windor Tie Knot



















The Half-Windsor - a less vocal and pretentious knot. This one is classy and smart, and there is minimal risk of you looking like a goofball with a full-Windsor knot that is bigger than your Adam's apple.

Half Windsor Tie Knot



















The Cross Knot - for the man who wears a skinny tie and wants it to stand out. This knot is ridiculous, but if you can do it flawlessly you are going to make major waves. Practice makes perfect.


Cross Knot Tie Knot

Bow Ties are Back
- This gentleman is a certifiable bow tying pro. He is the Bob Ross of bow ties (happy little bow tie), and for those who don't have grandfathers who are able to help you out, this guys ramblings will make you feel right at home.

 

The Matrix Reloaded Ediety Knot - An extra-special occasion knot for all of those sci-fi lovers out there. If you don't want to wave your geek flag with pride, take this guys advice and say it's "French."




To keep the stud factor going in high-gear, keep your ties fresh and wrinkle free with a svelte personalized deluxe leather tie case. Your (somewhat belated) 2010 New Year Resolution: no more knotted ties hanging in your closet.

My Video Game Is Too Violent For My Girlfriend

Posted December 29, 2009 3:05 PM

Dear Guyville,

I recently acquired Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 and I freakin' love it. My girlfriend, on the other hand, does not. She says that it has pushed the envelope too far. Apparently, controlling the actions of a fake terrorist as he blows away fake innocent bystanders can be considered morally reprehensible. And while I am happy to just agree to disagree (it's FAKE! It's a VIDEO GAME!) about the amoral implications of MW2, she is not. It is beginning to put a strain on our relationship. What do I do?

Guyville to the Rescue

Well the obvious answer would be not to play Modern Warfare 2 anymore. But then you would be the guy who stopped playing Modern Warfare 2 because his girlfriend didn't want him to play anymore after it hurt her feelings. If you were that guy, you wouldn't be asking the "what do I do?" question to begin with, so I guess that's not a viable option.
 
The second most obvious answer would be to not play MW2 in her presence, nor talk about it, nor have it in its case visible to the naked eye when she is in the room. Which sounds like a pretty easy thing to do, especially if you don't live together. It could be one of those little vices we never talk about and do only when we are alone because it brings up awkward questions and judgments.

If you do live together and "alone time" doesn't really exist anymore, or if you don't want to lump your new favorite video game in with nudey magazines and eating chili cold out of the can, things get a little more complicated.

You could give Modern Warfare 2 to your neighbor and constantly run out of sugar or eggs or Drain-o so you have an excuse to run over and get a few quick rounds in.

You could lie and say that it's All Boys and No Girls Poker Night at your house once a week, but actually have it be All Boys and No Girls Modern Warfare Night. Just leave a card deck or two out on the kitchen table and crush some tortilla chips into the carpet so it looks like Men have been around.

You could use time to play Modern Warfare 2 as a bartering tool. "I promise to stop making snarky remarks during Project Runway if you stop accusing me of being a heartless, mindless drone when I play MW2."

You could try to explain again that it is just a game and you don't actually think being a terrorist and killing hipsters at the local Jamba Juice is cool or a good idea.

Try to turn the sound down really low so you can pretend you are actually playing a nice game, like Wii Golf or Mario Kart.

You could just ignore her complaints and comments and continue to play and laugh (yes, laugh!) as the body count increases. In for a penny, in for a pound. Note: I only recommend this one if you don't really like your girlfriend anymore...

For more sneak-tastic methods of avoiding detection, check out Guyville's tips on hiding your video game addiction.

Happy Holidays from Guyville

Posted December 22, 2009 10:52 AM

Gentlemen and Guys,

We here at Guyville wish you the most merry of holidays this week. Sit back and relax. Indulge in pecan pie and savory turbaconucken. Play video games and watch football and sleep in and wear your slippers all day long. Even when you run out for an extra bottle of Captain Morgan when your supply of Hot Buttered Rum is diminishing.


Gifts for Guys under the Christmas tree


Rejoice! We hope that all your holiday wishes come true, and that there are many wonderful personalized pub signs (with your name on them!) under the Yule tree.

Your Morning After New Year's Party Care Package

Posted December 16, 2009 1:58 PM

It's January 1st. The glowing rays of morning afternoon sun strike your reposing body. You crack open those bleary, sleep-crusted eyes for the first time in the new decade. You stretch and sit up, ready to jump start those New Years resolutions and grab the year of tiger by its fangs.

And then you see the mass of mostly-empty beer cans and broken champagne bottles littering the floor of your apartment.

And then you choke back the first bout of hangover vomit.

And then you see two people you don't recognize sleeping on the couch without their pants on.

And then you remember that last night was a raging New Years celebration.

Gifts for Men - Hangover Care Package


It's a good thing '2009 you' prepared for the aftermath of a Night-of-Your-Life Party with  hangover cures in this:

Your Morning After New Year's Party Care Package

Gifts for Guys - Personalized E-Z Fill FlaskA personalized E-Z fill flask. Getting started the morning after is near impossible if your brain is cracking open and your gut is kicking off in the roiling bile bowl (I think USC is playing in that this year). Fight back with some hair of the dog who bit you. The wide mouth of the E-Z fill flask means you won't spill a drop, even if your vision's a little blurry. You will be up and at 'em in no time.





Gifts for Guys - Personalized Ice BucketA new ice bucket. When in the heat of a Jager bomb moment, turning everything into a hat sounds like a great idea. Think ahead and hide a personalized ice bucket under your bed where no one can add it to their collection of ass hattery.






Gifts for Guys - Personalized Logan Deluxe Duffle BagA duffle bag.Pretty much everything in that bachelor hole you call home is going to have to be thrown away. Chances are it has been soaked in beer, saturated with champagne, and probably been used as a receptacle for various bodily fluids. You're better off starting the new year by moving. Take the bare essentials in your personalized Logan deluxe duffle bag and get out of there.




Gifts for Guys - Personalized Tavern Mug SetNew beer mugs. Everything that is in your kitchen cabinets will be broken. Get over it. Buy yourself a personalized tavern mug set that will last you until 2011 - or until your next blow-out bash.







Gifts for Guys - Personalized Multi-Purpose Tool with PliersA multi-purpose tool with pliers.You're going to need something to get your bathroom door back on its hinges. But seeing as how you are the champ of the New Years '10 Beer Pong tourney, it's pretty much worth it.


20% off Next-Day Shipping Sale Just In Time for the Holidays

Posted December 15, 2009 3:18 PM

I know what you were thinking. "Oh man, I could so use some amazing holiday gifts for guys. Those personalized cufflinks are bad ass. I just wish those shipping charges weren't there because I would so buy some for my friends and brother!"


Gifts for Guys - Gunmetal Personalized Round Cufflinks


Well, lucky you. Because starting Wednesday December 16, Guyville is hosting a baller 20% off next-day shipping sale. Your wish has been granted.

But your wish only lasts for two days, from Wednesday December 16 to Thursday December 17. Take advantage now!

Best Guy Movies You Forgot Were About Christmas

Posted December 10, 2009 12:35 PM

Every year it happens. You're basking in the warm glow of the television when the bombardment of your better half rains down with those annoying little words: "Baby, I wanna watch a Christmas movie."

Oh. Dear. God. Not Little Women again! Your argument of "just because it has a Christmas scene, doesn't mean it's a Christmas movie" is weaker than your left-handed layup.

You reach for a compromise, but all you have is A Christmas Story. It's tired, dated and you've seen that little snot neighbor kid stick his tongue to the light pole every year since you were five. Skip the heart-tingling Santa story and choose something with some gusto. Maybe an explosion or two. Better yet, how about a crane kick to the face?

Before we start our "Movies at Christmas, but not about Christmas" list, here are some that didn't quite make it:

Home Alone - It's not directly about Christmas, and it comes with a healthy dose of slapstick buffoonery with a side of air gun blasts to the groin. However, if you forgot Marv and Harry were burglarizing houses during the holidays, you should slap cheeks with both hands and scream.

Edward Scissorhands - What seemed like a majestic trip inside Tim Burton's mind, now looks like just another Tim Burton movie. Honestly, who wants clippers for hands? No fingers, just sharp pointy blades. How are you supposed to pee? As a Guyville first, we say let Johnny be a guy pirate all he wants, but leave the scissor dude in the 80's. Edward Scissorhands is not a guy movie.

Reindeer Games - Who would have thought you could take a simple line from Rudolph and turn it into an action-packed thriller. Ben Affleck, that's who. Trust us, it's a terrible movie. One CNN review said, "Reindeer Games isn't at the bottom of the creative barrel, but it's close." You're better off watching Little Women again.

With that said, nothing will put you into a jollier mood than these totally guy Christmas movies:

10. Dead Poets Society

Dead-Poets-Society.jpg

O' Captain! My Captain! Ok, it might not put you in the most jolly of moods, but this coming of age tale about a poetry teacher inspiring seven young prep school boys to seize the day is a refreshing reminder that Robin Williams wasn't always making an ass of himself. You'll laugh. You'll cry (that's not an understatement. The room might get a little dusty when one of the seven doesn't quite pull through). Using our Little Woman logic, since the movie take place throughout a school year and there are Christmas scenes - it totally counts.

9. Lethal Weapon

lethal weapon.jpg

"I'm too old for this shit!" I'm too old to remember Mel Gipson was supposed to be "the lethal weapon". I'm too old to remember he was a hunky sex God with a mullet. And I'm too old to remember all four movies revolved around Murtaugh's family providing a shelter for Riggs to rebuild his shattered life - starting with a heartfelt Christmas meal. This crazy awesome buddy cop flick will make you think dislocating your shoulder to escape from a straight jacket is just as easy as it looks. Go ahead, try it!

8. Psycho

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Fun factoid: since red blood looks gray when filmed in black and white, Alfred Hitchcock used Hersey's Syrup to simulate blood in the shower scene. This is one of those solid movies where you probably know the ending, but have never sat down and watched the whole thing. Where's Christmas? We're unsure if they ever mention the holidays, but there are signs of Christmas trees and ornaments sprinkled throughout the film.

7. Ghostbusters II

ghostbusters 2.jpg

Vigo. The master of evil. Tryin' to battle my boys. That's not legal. The boys in gray are back at it to stop the end of the world on New Year's Eve 1989. On a scale of one to awesome, the Ghostbusters are pretty high on the list, but this movie hurts their legacy. It seemed like a mishmash of all the ideas they couldn't fit into the first movie: The Statue of Liberty crossing the Hudson. The tired love story with Sigourney Weaver. Slimer sliming things for the hell of it. Even without bringing anything new to the table, Ghostbusters II has timeless special effects and some sweet late 80's rap that you'll be hummin' before the night is through.

6. Die Hard 2 - Die Harder

die hard 2.jpg

Nowadays, we don't fart around with the idea of terrorists hijacking planes and crashing them during the holidays. But back in 1990, airline terrorists seem to be as mythical as Santa himself. Just like Ghostbusters II, the first Die Hard sequel seems to be just another rehash of the first one. How does a New York cop find himself in Chicago, only to fight terrorists - again on Christmas Eve? This time McClane has shoes (a big plus) and he uses a lighter to blow up a 747!

5. Batman Returns

batman returns.jpg

After his aristocratic parents leave him at the doorstep of the city zoo, a deformed child grows under the care of penguins to become an evil arch nemesis of the caped crusader. Weak sauce, Mr. Penguin! Watch out, you might get me with your umbrella. Lucky for us Michelle Pfeiffer steals the show as the sexiest Catwoman to ever don pleather. It's not the best out of the litter, but it's far from the worst. Remember, Christmas is to winter as Batman is to badass.

4. The Karate Kid

karate kid.jpg

When my kids ask me "what were the 80's like?" I'll show them the You're the Best fight montage during the All Hill Valley Karate Tournament (along with the scene Axel Foley drives down Rodeo Drive in Beverly Hills Cop and the opening sequence to The A-Team. Those three things were the 1980's through my prepubescent eyes.) Bill Simmons describes Mr. Miyagi as "a cross between Mickey from "Rocky," Pop from "The Longest Yard" and Confucious." There's no one you can hate more than that blond douche Johnny Lawrence, and you can't help but feel like Daniel-san would tear the whole Cobra Kia dojo a new one by the end of the movie. BTW, the All Hill Valley Karate Tournament happens in December. There are Christmas lights in the background. Crane kick this DVD in the player and start sweeping the leg.

3. Rocky IV

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The movie that single handedly ended the Cold War! Rocky retires. Apollo fights the Russian. Apollo dies. Rocky unretires. Goes to Russia. Hearts on Fire montage as he climbs the impossibly steep snowy mountain. Rocky fights the Russian. Rocky wins! "I guess what I'm trying to say, is that if I can change, and you's can change, everybody can change!" You guessed it. Rocky won the fight on Christmas Day.

2. Gremlins

gemlins.jpg

Three rules: Stay away from bright light. Stay away from water. Stay away from food after midnight. No, these aren't the rules for your one-night stand. This is to prevent your mogwai from multiplying. Billy receives little 'Gizmo' for Christmas and everything goes to hell when it multiplies and takes over the town. The weirdest part about this 'kinda Christmas movie' is when Kate tells Billy that her fear of Christmas was hatched as a child when her father broke his neck sneaking down the chimney dress like Santa Clause.

1. Die Hard

die hard.jpg

What does it mean to die hard? Apparently, it's when you fall to your death from an 80 story building in downtown Los Angeles. As the ultimate guy Christmas flick, Die Hard passes the test of time. No other story about a shoeless cop thwarting a band of foreign terrorists on Christmas Eve comes close. Seriously. Watch this movie again. The cinematography is jaw dropping. The story is compelling. And Bruce Willis? Yippee kai yay, mother-effing fantastic!


8 Ways To Hide Your Video Game Addiction

Posted December 8, 2009 11:07 AM

It's the wake-up call of 2009. If Andy Murray - millionaire, sports super-star, and stud (with an accent no less...chicks love accents!) - cannot hold onto his lady because of an alleged video game "problem," hope is dwindling for the rest of us. Because, when it comes down to it, we probably don't have 1/3 of Andy's appeal. If your gal pal isn't turned on by baller thumb callouses and your 3:1 kill to death ratio, you'd better hide your video game addiction quick before she pulls a Kim Sears on your gaming behind.

Gifts for Men - Video Game Addiction

8 Things Andy Murray Should Have Done

1. Gotten his girlfriend hooked, too. Nothing says love and "us time" like teaming up to stop Russia's virtual invasion of the United States.

2. Hidden his console and any evidence of playing. Most men master this at the age of 15 when the fruits of internet and cable access are discovered, so the instant channel-flip, computer screen minimize, and controller stash should be ingrained.

3. Convinced his girlfriend that he was required to play. Faster reaction time killing Nazi zombies equals faster reaction time on the tennis court. Everyone knows that.

4. Turned his bathroom into a gamer paradise. Move all the equipment into a locking lavatory, feign some food poisoning, and enjoy uninterrupted hours of WOW. Just keep the sound off, or there will be some explaining to do.

5. Blamed it on someone else. "That's not my Halo. That's Federer's game. Go talk to his girl friend."

6. Scheduled lots of long trips. She won't want to go to a week long underground tennis tourney in Bulgaria. Invent trips, hole up in a hotel, and have at it.

7. Masked his stories of gaming triumphs with language his girlfriend can relate to. "I went out with Jeremy the other day to stock up on supplies, and we ended up saving a ton of cash!" is the non-video game addict version of "Yesterday, after completing our gather quest, Neldor Moonshadow and I received a huge amount of in-game money!" No one is the wiser.

8. Dumped her first. Wear the Gamer Badge with pride. If she doesn't like the situation, she can hit the road. Some other girl will appreciate dedication, skill, and precision shooting for what it's worth.

Halloween Cocktails, Murderous Martinis and Spooky Shots

Posted October 22, 2009 2:36 PM

Just because you don't go trick-or-treating on Halloween, doesn't mean you can't enjoy a tasty treat. Halloween is all about spooky parties, ghastly costumes and murderous martinis. If you're throwing a Monster Mash at your place this year, take our advice with these ghostly concoctions to get your party started.

Crystal Head Vodka

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OK. We know it's not a mixed drink, but this new vodka distilled by Dan Akyroyd is perfect for Halloween. As the heart of the Ghostbusters, Dan Aykroyd is a guru for all things paranormal and unbelievable, and claims he spent the last 13 years researching the legends of the crystal skulls. Based on Native American beliefs, these skulls represent mystical properties and represent a life-affirming symbology.

Even if you don't believe in any of that crap, you can still enjoy a Ghostbuster brewed, sweet grain, premium vodka out of a freakin' skull!


Stay Puffed Marshmallow Martini

marshmellow-martini.jpg

Staying with the Ghostbusters theme, cross the streams of your favorite booze to make this creamy treat.

Stay Puffed Marshmallow Martini Ingredients

1 oz. Bailey's Irish Cream

1 oz. Cream de Cocoa

1 oz. Vanilla Vodka

1 oz. Marshmallow Fluff or 3 mini marshmallows

Chocolate syrup

Crushed graham crackers

Instructions:

  1. Rim the Martini glass with chocolate syrup and crushed graham cracker.
  2. Place Irish Cream, Cream de Cocoa, Vanilla Vodka in Personalized Martini Shaker with ice. Shake well.
  3. Gently pour contents into a blender with the Marshmallow Fluff (If you don't have a blender, substitute fluff with Mini Marshmallows, and pour into martini glass).


Brain Hemorrhage

Brain-Hemorrhage.jpg

This shot looks like a demon lives in your glass. No matter how crazy it looks, it's a great conversation starter with the hottie in the Princess Leia Slave girl outfit.

Brain Hemorrhage Ingredients

.5 to .75 Peach Schnapps

1 tsp Grenadine

1-2 Tbsp Bailey's Irish Cream

Instructions:

  1. Fill a Personalized Shot Glass with Peach Schnapps.
  2. In a Tbsp. place a tsp. of Grenadine, and fill the rest with Irish Cream.
  3. Slowly float the Grenadine/Irish Cream on the top of the shot. The cream should fall without separating.
  4. Fill the rest of the shot with Irish cream to taste.


Blood Orange Martini

blood-martini.jpg

If you're skipping the creamy crawly concoctions, try this lighter martini instead.

Blood Orange Martini Ingredients

1.5 oz. Orange Vodka

1.5 oz. Campari

1.5 oz. Orange Juice

Sprinkle of cinnamon

Instructions:

  1. Mix the Orange Vodka, Campari and Orange Juice in a Personalized Martini Shaker with ice.
  2. Pour into a chilled Personalized Martini Glass.
  3. Sprinkle with cinnamon and possible garnish with slice of pumpkin.


Midnight Martini

midnight-martini.jpg

You'll wake up the dead with delight after you try this black treat from beyond the grave.

Midnight Martini Ingredients:

3.5 oz. of Blavod Vodka

.5 oz. Blackberry Brandy or Black Raspberry

Lemon twist or olive for garnish

Instructions:

Pour ingredients in an iced cocktail shaker. Shake well.

Strain into a chilled cockatil glass or old-fashioned glass.

Garnish, and enjoy.

Housewarming Must-Haves to Warm Up Your Cold Bachelor Pad

Posted September 8, 2009 10:19 AM

Bachelor pads are for men. Not boys. Make it look that way. Invest some cash into your fortress of solitude. Register for cool housewarming gifts for bachelors and turn it into the place to be Saturday night.

Less is More

ikea hamra

Minimalism makes your place look bigger, cleaner and manlier. Minimalism can also make your place seem as cold as a bitter stare from your ex-girlfriend. Fill your space with stuff that makes you feel cozy but doesn't clutter.

This Ikea Hamra "seating unit" gives off a swingin' hotel vibe without a hefty hotel price tag. This bachelor pad centerpiece has enough seating for your fantasy football draft party.


Get a Dog

Chicks love dogs. They especially love "rescued" dogs. Saving Astro from the pound (and certain death by euthanasia) not only makes you a hero, it gives you an excuse to bring your new lady friend upstairs. Guyville Pickup line: You should come up and help take my dog out... then you can help with Astro.

Get a Bar

folding home bar

Pimp out your place like Don Drapper's office. This Ebony Folding Home Bar adds sophistication with a space saving design. The bar part really doesn't matter - it's the idea of the bar that counts. Invest $50 bucks in liquor, and get these housewarming essentials:

It doesn't matter if it's cheap. People don't care what they drink if it's presented right. A personalized set of Double Old Fashioned Glasses sets the standard for your minimalist bar - convince your friends to spring for it as a housewarming gift and you're set.

Entertain your Friends

The quintessential bachelor pad has a TV so large, it's obviously overcompensates for something. No one wants to sit at your house and watch your big TV. Bring something more to the party. Board games like Apples to Apples, Catch Phrase and Cranium are gender neutral and make awesome drinking games.

Woman-proof your Bathroom

shave kit

When a girl walks through the front door, the bathroom is the first place she's heading - to scope out your medicine cabinet. Place extra toilet paper in plain view, keep a stack of fresh towels and always have a spare toothbrush on hand. A Silver-Plated Shave Kit is an elegant accessory that says, "I'm a classic, worldly gentleman who cares about every detail."






Art adds Class to the Dude Sanctuary

You don't live in a T.G.I. Friday's, don't put up crazy crap for the hell of it. And your Tony Montoya "say hello to my little friend" poster isn't doing the trick either. I'm not a mobster, I'm not a mobster - repeat until it sticks and you're ready to get rid of the mobster memorabilia. Tasteful wall art shows off your personality and adds depth to a room. Change the focal point of your bachelor pad with a well placed personalized bar sign.

Framed Pictures are a Chick Magnet

Women gravitate toward them, and judge with an iron fist. You pictures show your history, values and passions. Pictures of you with the family are great. Pictures of you and the ex are not.

The point of a bachelor pad is to create a home fit for a man. Keep an eye for detail. Stay classy and choose comfort over style. And do not put a reed diffuser anywhere. Remember, you're a man.

The 10 Commandments of the Slurpee

Posted August 27, 2009 11:53 AM

A.jpgSlurpees mean many things to many people. Back in the days when alcohol wasn't an option, a Slurpee was a refreshing substitute. When we were kids, Slurpees kept us cool on hot days and sugar buzzed on boring ones. Slurpees not only tasted amazing (and still do), they made the perfect sludge to pour over your friend's head as an ice-cold prank.



In honor of the beverage we love so much, Guyville.com presents you with The 10 Commandments of the Slurpee.

Handed down on paper cups to man in 1959 by way of a Kansas hamburger stand, these commandments are the imperatives that serve as the moral foundation for Slurpee enjoyment and promotion. The holy covenant between man and 7-11:

  1. I am the Slurpee and there shall be no other carbonated iced beverages before me.

  2. Doth not attempt to create a false Slurpee. Get thee to a 7-11.

  3. Doth not take the Slurpee name in vain. Always speak well of the Slurpee.

  4. Remember that 7-11 is always open and therefore, everyday is Slurpee Sabbath.

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  6. Honor thy Slurpee machine and wait until the orange light goes off. It shall tell ye when it is ready.

  7. Doth not kill a Slurpee. Thy brain will freeze.

  8. Stay true to thy Slurpee. Doth not commit adultery with Icees, Slushies or Squishees.

  9. Doth not steal Slurpees. Always pay at the counter.

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  11. Doth not be untrue to thy Slurpee, always drink out of the official Slurpee cup. They are inventory after all.

  12. Thou shalt not covet another man's Slurpee. Get thy own.

  13. Thou shalt not judge another man's Slurpee flavor combination.

C.jpgFollow these commandments as they have been laid out for ye and ye shall find yourself in the good graces of flavor, tingly tastebuds and refreshing cool slurps. For extra caution, an 11th commandment has been added to protect the multi-Slurpee flavor believer.

Depp will not star in Don Quixote film

Posted August 10, 2009 12:10 PM

Johnny_Depp.jpg Looks as though Johnny Depp will not be starring in the film about the famous literary figure Don Quixote. After a string of disasters that have led to monumental filming delays, Depp - according to news sources - is walking away from director Terry Gilliam's project.

Gilliam had managed to get Johnny Depp and Jean Rochefort to star in the movie way back in 2000. The weather damaged sets and scheduling issues have pushed scheduling for the Don Quixote based film back an entire decade.

Paula Abdul quits "American Idol"

Posted August 5, 2009 9:58 AM

Paula-Abdul.jpgWhether you loved her or you hated her, Paula Abdul will not be returning for a ninth season as a judge on the hit reality show American Idol.

Though we won't be missing Paula's presence on American Idol, it is certain she did fill a space on the judges panel that will be tough - if not impossible - to replace.

If you're saddened by the news that Paula is leaving, or if you're jumping for joy; moments like these call for a drink. And for just such an event, isn't it nice to know you have your dandy flask handy? Oh, you don't own a flask?







bi-leatfls.jpgPersonalized Stainless Steel Leather Flask - BUY NOW Ensure you never miss out on the moments that require the proper toast by getting our Stainless Steel Leather flask. This attractive flask is on sale at 30% off from $25.00, now only $17.50. If you need a flask, make sure you hurry up grab this deal while it's still hear, because this sale ends today!

Introducing Homeless Joe:

Posted August 3, 2009 10:58 AM

Homeless Joe asks questions no other host would dare answer!

Tired of talkshow hosts that ask the same old questions? Well, Homeless Joe may be the answer to those ills. The introductory clip here says it all, and so does Homeless Joe apparently!

Homeless Joe Interviews Pixie Joe Santiago

For an interview with the very private Joe Santiago from the Pixies, check out this clip. You'll never guess some the questions Homeless Joe is willing to ask!

William Shatner Performs Palin Farewell:

Posted July 28, 2009 8:14 AM

Shatner Makes Palin's Speech Poetry with Hilarious Results

If you happened to catch Sarah Palin's resignation speech as Governor of Alaska, you know how utterly mind boggling it was. Palin could've been speaking Mandarin for the last half of it. The closing was that confusing. If you were left scratching your head wondering what the former Alaskan Governor had said, there's no need to fret.

For that, William Shatner was at our service on Conan O'Brien last evening. He dutifully translated Palin's odd speech in words we could all understand. Honestly, what would we do without you, Mr. Shatner?

Check out the hilarious clip to see Shatner reciting Palin's farewell speech in a way only William Shatner can.

Three Sheets Is Back!

Posted July 24, 2009 10:27 AM

Zane Lamprey's edutainment show about international pub-crawling is finally back on the air. If you haven't seen it (you totally should because there's a free download on iTunes right now), every episode of Three Sheets takes Zane to a new country where he shows how he's drunk on life... and on beer. Think of each episode as a mini vacation that explores the local drinks, customs, and the inevitable hangover cures involved with a typical night on the town. This is the ultimate Guyville show, but after three extraordinary seasons, it almost never saw the light of day again.



Baby, I lost my MOJO

Originally, Three Sheets broadcasted over the MOJO Network. This was supposed to be "the network for guys," but with other shows like Wall Street Warriors and Start-Up Junkies, most of their other content was more concerned with celebrating the douchebaggery of 20-something salesmen. In December 2008, right about the time the country was sick of linking the nation's economy collapse with all the antics on Wall Street, the MOJO Network pulled the plug on their entire channel, taking their highest rated show, Three Sheets, down with it.

Since that time, Zane Lamprey ran a grassroots effort to Save Three Sheets, with major rallies in New York and Los Angeles - which ultimately lead to a contract with the Fine Living Network (FLN) who will broadcast the show every weeknight at 10 pm. You can also catch up with the show on iTunes, or you can see the last three seasons on Hulu.com or Netflix.

Newbie to Three Sheets?

This awesome food and booze fest of a show also serves as a drinking game. Here are the rules:

  1. When Zane drinks, you drink.
  2. The first person to spot Pleepleus the monkey, makes someone else drink.
  3. When Zane mentions his friend, Steve McKenna, everyone drinks.
  4. When Zane or anyone burps, the last person to give the "Good Burp" sign (thumb on your forehead, pinky in the air) drinks.
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So the next time you feel like staying in with the boys, bust out the Personalized Pilsner Set and let Zane do the bar-hopping for you. If you feel like getting especially tipsy, try playing the Three Sheets drinking game with these Engraved Island Shooter Glasses, but be forewarned, Zane can really party hard!

How to Live Like the Mad Men

Posted July 20, 2009 1:17 PM

Move over James Bond. There's a new sleek, suave, womanizing icon, and he's a mad man. If you're not on board yet, AMC's Mad Men turns the wholesome image of the 1950's on its head as advertising mogul Don Draper guides you through the debauchery and antics of doing business on Madison Avenue. If you want to be in high fashion this fall, or you just need something to talk about with the ladies, stick with Guyville and our buddy, Don Draper.

Slick Back

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Slick, shinny, greased up hair was a symbol of the 1950's. Hell, it's probably easier to pull off this look than the current 'awesome looking under achiever who just got out of bed.' When your hair is in perfect order, it looks like you can rule the world.

Be Mysterious

When you refuse to talk about your past, it flips a switch in women to rip off your clothes to find out more about you. The other benefit is when people wonder about us, it makes us more important.

Don Draper's Tip

Make up a back-story to overshadow your troubled past and pick a new name. Nobody is lucky enough to actually be given a legendary name like Donald Draper at birth.

Suit Up

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The suit is like the like a new layer of skin above the epidermis. If you're following Draper's lead, the slimmer the better. The skinny tie. The tapered jacket. The pressed paints. If the suit actually fits, looking square is the sexy way to go. If you look the part, see the Mad Men casting call.

Don Draper's Tip

keep a stack of folded white dress shirts in your desk drawer just in case you were out all night with a "client."

Womanize with Tact

Whenever referring to a woman, the phrases 'sweetheart', 'doll face' and 'hot lips' are all acceptable names to call out when you want their attention. When you're trying to sweet talk a lady, use phrases like "What you call love was invented by guys like me, to sell nylons," and finish it up with some explanation about how "there's no tomorrow, so we need to be together now."

Smokes and Drinks

I've never had a cigarette in my life, but they smoke so often on this show that I am convinced:

  1. It looks awesome
  2. It can't be that bad for you
  3. It's a proven way to get chicks
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Any moment you're not smoking like a chimney, it's imperative that you have a drink in your hand. And we're talking any time of the day - working, driving or even pleasuring a woman. Don's Tip: Have a set of personalized glasses so when your boss has to take a glass of brandy out the door for his car ride home; he'll know who to return it to. (People were totally crazy like this in the 50's, so the glasses aren't really recommended for this purpose, but they still look pretty cool.)

This is your chance to get caught up. Mad Men Season 3 premiers in August!

Running of the Bulls Turns Violent

Posted July 10, 2009 8:36 AM

Man gored to death at Pamplona event

The running of the bulls in Pamplona turned ugly for the first time in over a decade when Daniel Gimeno Romero, a 27 year old Spaniard from Alcala de Henares, died after being gored in the neck and lung.

Pictures revealed Romero lying on a stretcher following the goring, his eyes half-open and blood covering his neck and face. These days, the runs attract over 2,000 people over the span of the nine day fiesta. The event was made famous globally by Ernest Hemingway in The Sun Also Rises.

If you thought the running of the bulls wasn't as dangerous as it once was, maybe the events of this morning will change your opinion. Check out this clip of the running of the bulls on the first day of the San Fermin festival this year. And don't forget to let us know if you plan to run with the bulls in Pamplona.

Madoff Sentenced 150 Years

Posted June 29, 2009 9:12 AM

madoff.jpgA judge sentenced Ponzi schemer Bernard Madoff to 150 years in prison today. Madoff was the mastermind behind the biggest Ponzi scheme in the history of the infamous pyramid style financial ploys.

The 150 year sentence is the most that New York prosecutor's requested. They came to the 150 year terms given the magnitude of Madoff's victims and the amount of money he subsequently stole with it. Is it too soon to toast the US justice system for a job well done?


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We think not. There's no better way to mix those fancy drinks, so do it while you can with the Engraved Luxe Cocktail Shaker. One cocktail poured from this fine shaker, and all your troubles - be them as big as Madoffs or as trivial as having to make a big toast - will float away.

Get your very own Cocktail Shaker, TODAY ONLY 30% off $30.00 $21.00.

BUY NOW!!!

Billy Mays Tribute

Posted June 29, 2009 8:20 AM

Infomercial King Pronounced Dead over Weekend

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Billy Mays - the long time TV pitchman - passed away this weekend. He was pronounced dead on Sunday. You probably remember Billy Mays from the many late night infomercials he hosted, particularly for the Oxiclean suite of products. Mays gained his fame via the Home Shopping Network during the mid 90s. Back then he was pitching a line of cleaners for Orange Glo International of Denver.

In honor of the Infomercial King himself, check out this top ten video of some of the worst television ads ever produced. Billy Mays would never have dreamed about putting his good name behind these outrageous items:

Save 10% on summer gifts for guys at Guyville

Posted June 24, 2009 1:45 PM

Guyville's 10% off sale now offers free engraving on all products

From grilling gifts for guys to personalized accessories for the executive retreat, nothing says summertime stylin' like classic personalized gifts for guys from Guyville.

This is a limited time offer, so don't wait. As an added bonus, any order over $99 comes with free shipping. Orders of six or more are eligible for a bulk rate discount. Contact customer service for more information.

Enjoy the summer and these great savings on gifts for men at Guyville!

Ed McMahon Dies

Posted June 23, 2009 7:56 AM

Guyville Remembers Legendary TV Showman


EdMcMahon_IMG_20090623.jpgIt saddens us to inform you that Ed McMahon - the legendary television personality who served as Johnny Carson's sidekick - passed away in LA around midnight this morning. The 86 year old funny man had been struggling with bone cancer.

Without Ed McMahon's famous "He-e-e-e-e-e-ere's Johnny!" introduction, and his spectacular rapport with Johnny Carson, the Tonight Show would never have become the iconic late night show we remember it as today.

Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon were one of the best television tandems. One look at this clip of a tipsy McMahon being chided by Johnny is enough to show why they were so successful on screen for so many years.

From all of us at guyville.com: we'll miss you, Ed.

Artie Lange Crosses Line on Joe Buck's First Show

Posted June 17, 2009 12:25 PM

Is it just us, or did The Howard Stern Show's marketing team really go all out for May and June? First it was Bababooey's opening pitch video , then it was Howard ripping on Jay Leno, now Artie Lange's controversial appearance on the first Joe Buck Live show just a few nights ago. It may not be the best publicity, but when did the Howard Stern Show ever discern a difference?

We'd show you the video of Artie going off, but apparently HBO is so mortified for Artie they've made all online video feeds of his rant unavailable. Instead, click on the video below to hear Artie defend his Joe Buck appearance:

We'd like to hear from you. Did Artie cross the line on the Joe Buck Show, or was it just another reason to tune into Howard Stern this summer?

Ryan Leaf Surrenders

Posted June 12, 2009 1:43 PM

Oh, how the mighty have fallen. The former Washington State University and San Diego Chargers quarterback is expected to surrender to Texas authorities. Leaf was indicted on May 20th for burglary and drug charges after recently being release from his quarterback coaching position at West Texas A&M.

Ryan Leaf in San Diego:



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Leaf's game on and off the field made the Chargers look like San Diego's namesake, which of course in German means whale's vagina. Even if Ron Burgundy doesn't have his facts right, he still knows he can cheer on Ryan Leaf's safe journey back to Texas with a Personalized NFL Stein. Hey Ryan, We'll see you next fall.

Howard Stern on Letterman: Ripping Leno a New One

Posted June 9, 2009 4:27 PM

Howard's Jay Leno Rant on The Late Show was Vintage Stern

With all the changes occurring on the late night TV scene these last few weeks, it's been hard enough keeping up with the day to day happenings.

Now it seems that Howard Stern has added a layer of dramatic complexity to the late night stew by ripping on Jay Leno while being interviewed on Letterman's Late Show. Don't get the wrong idea, we love a classic Howard Stern rant from time to time, but this particular outburst went a bit over the top. He even made Dave a little uncomfortable.

If you weren't up for Howard's verbal fireworks last evening, check out the video below to see the beginning of the interview.

And don't forget to let us know who you think the best talk show host in the business is - past or present - by voting in the poll at the end of this post.

Backyard BBQs Gone Bad

Posted June 3, 2009 2:42 PM

Barbecue Bedlam: Protect Yourself This Summer

What You Need To Know

Memorial Day is as much a commemoration of our fallen soldiers as it is a kickoff to the BBQ season. If our last statement makes you salivate with anticipation, this post is for you.

When guys hear the word Barbecue, something deep within us is triggered. Maybe it's the fire of the grill, the smell of the coals, or that a Barbecue is our one chance to take a raw hunk of carcass and grill it into a bit of smoked heaven.

Whatever triggers it, the mere mention of a BBQ is inebriating to even the calmest of men. That said, few guys realize the danger of this intoxication. Add beer and friends to this reckless mix, and you've got a recipe for some seriously bad decisions.

Don't believe us? Check out these clips of backyard BBQs, and decide yourself:

The Reason Why Pools and Trampolines Don't Mix

Slipping, Sliding, and Face Planting

Your best way of avoiding these barbecue atrocities is by being aware and prepared this summer.

Plan ahead this year with our assortment of barbeque accessories. We've got stuff you probably haven't even thought about adding to your backyard grill kit like this Steak Brand. We've also got the must-have barbecue items, like this useful Grillmaster Plus Apron.

Ensure your barbecue memories this summer are both fond, and free of the annual hospital visit.

Guide to a Close and Comfortable Shave

Posted June 1, 2009 5:01 PM

Shaving your face is a man's domain. Mostly because if you saw a chick shave her face, it will make you shiver in disgust. We can all agree it is an important grooming regiment. Without shaving, some dudes look like the missing link. Others (ahem, me) give the impression of a teenage boy still wandering through puberty. Shaving helps guys look great and feel awesome. Plus, a razor is far more useful than a tie on Father's Day. Turn to Guyville, the guy gifts expertfor our guide to a close and comfortable shave.

If it hurts to shave, you're doing it wrong!

If you have red bumps or razor burn while shaving, try doing it in the shower. Warm water and steam are more capable of opening up the pores in your face and softening the hair on your chin and neck, compared to the once-over with sink water. Also, be sure to exfoliate your skin to remove all the dead skin cells before you shave. This will lift stubble and smooth skin over time.

Shave tip: Dry your face while you're still in the shower, or else the shaving cream won't stick to your face.

The tools of the trade

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A badger hair brush makes a world of difference when applying shaving cream. Not only is it old school cool, but it helps massage the cream into your skin, which raises the hair off your skin while creating a smooth surface for your blade. Try the Traditional Shaving Set with Mach3 Razor.


Shave tip: If you have sensitive skin, make sure your shaving cream/gel is odor free. All those foofy smells are just chemicals that piss off your skin in the form of a white head.

All the right strokes

The blade should shave in the same direction that your hair grows. This prevents ingrown hairs and razor burn. Try the Silver-Plated-Matte Black Shaving Set with Mach3 Razor for a close shave.

Shave tip:If you want a closer shave, re-lather and shave gently across or against the grain.

After-shave routine

After-shave is only mentioned because it was a good transitional phrase, not a good product. Just like the perfume added to shaving cream, the fresh sensation after-shave provides is actually an alcohol base that irritates the skin.

Shaving tip: Use a gentle facial moisturizer with no less than SPF 15.

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If you're on the move, or need an awesome gift for guys, try the Eleven Piece Leather Manicure/Shave Set.


Guyville Memorial Day Salute

Posted May 22, 2009 12:28 PM

Guyville's Top 10 Memorial Day Tribute:

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Memorial Day conjures thoughts of barbecues, baseball, and other summertime fun. Lots of us think of the upcoming three-day weekend as the first kick-off to those warm days ahead. Still, it's good to remember what we're technically celebrating on our day off. That is, remembering the men and women who died serving our country. With that more serious thought in mind, this Memorial Day we're commemorating great guys from all walks of life, some of whom we've lost and will miss, and others who just plain deserve being mentioned:

Saluting Guys Of All Shapes and Sizes

These guys are still around, but that doesn't mean they don't deserve being recognized this Memorial Day!

Warren Beatty

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What guy doesn't know about Warren Beatty? The longstanding actor, director and screenwriter made a name for himself early on in Hollywood with his work starring and creating the 1967 film Bonnie and Clyde. The work positioned Beatty as a member of the New Hollywood Generation of filmmakers. Other 'new-gen' filmmakers include such notable directors as Francis Ford Coppola, Steven Spielberg, and Martin Scorsese.

What you might not know about Warren Beatty is that he served in the California Air National Guard and US Air Force Reserve from 1960 up through 1961. If you don't know much about Warren Beatty's acting career, check out the 1978 movie Heaven Can Wait, and see why we're saluting him this Memorial Day.

Clint Eastwood

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Put aside all the great roles Clint has done during his illustrious career. Forget about Dirty Harry, the spaghetti westerns, or the movie In the Line of Fire. Eastwood would still get a nod on our Memorial Day list.

Since his career as an actor became less prominent, Eastwood has settled into creating quality film after quality film. His 1994 film Unforgiven is arguably the best western in the history of Hollywood westerns, and his recent role in the 2008 flick Grand Torino proves that Clint can still play the bad-ass role to a tee. Check out Million Dollar Baby or Letters to Iwo Jima if you want to see some great Clint creations of late. Eastwood also served in the Korean War as a member of the US army from 1949 - 1950.

Mickey Rourke

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Rourke's Hollywood career started strong. He struck it big with his role in the popular film Diner. That acting gig solidified his early popularity in the 1980s, but he slid into obscurity like so many cultural phenomenons of that decade. Rourke, who moonlighted as a pro boxer between acting stints, came back in a big way this past year with his nomination for an Oscar in the acclaimed movie The Wrestler.




Hollywood's a tough business. But like Travolta, it looks as though Mickey still has something to offer. Guyville wishes Mr. Rourke the best this Memorial Day.





Continue reading "Guyville Memorial Day Salute" »

Top 10 Star Trek Collectibles to Make You a Starfleet Federation Badass!

Posted May 12, 2009 1:51 PM

The new Star Trek movie is here! If you're like me, you are busting out the classic Starfleet tunic while letting the glue dry on your Spock ears. It's been a long time, but Star Trek is finally cool again. Before you venture out into the final frontier of geekdom, here is the top 10 Star Trek collectibles to make you a Federation Starfleet badass!

10. Star Trek Red Shirt Cologne

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"Red Shirt" is slang for the unfamiliar security officers who were killed immediately after beaming down on the landing party. For a man willing to give his life for the universe, this is the cologne to prove it. With an essence of green mandarin, bergamot and a touch of lavender, Star Trek Red Shirt Cologne will give you a chance to live each day to the fullest because tomorrow may never come.







9. Star Trek Enterprise Foam Latex Vulcan Ear Tip Prop Set

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Live long and prosper with a set of Authentic Vulcan ears from Star Trek: Enterprise. It would be "illogical" to wear this Vulcan trademark; they're a collector's item.








8. Star Trek: The Next Generation Uniform Shirt Costume (Gold)

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Suit up! This gold Star Trek: The Next Generation Uniform Shirt will show off your allegiance to the Starfleet. Another upside - nobody wearing gold ever got shot in the landing party - just something to think about. Visor and dude from Reading Rainbow not included.








7. Star Trek TOS Communicator

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Wow, that flip design looks pretty familiar. It's likely that all cell phones today would appear totally different if it wasn't for the Star Trek TOS Communicator. Own the inspiration for mobile communication.









6. Star Trek Movie Electronic Phaser

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Blast those Romulans away with this sleek electronic Starfleet phaser from the 2009 Star Trek movie. Constructed from vacuum-metalized plastic, you'll set this phaser to "freakin' awesome."







5. Sterling Silver Delta Shield Pendant

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The Star Trek bling that's close to your heart. You can pin on the Sterling Silver Delta Shield Pendant to make any piece of clothing a Starfleet uniform.








4.48" Star Trek Klingon Batleth

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For the business man that needs to prove he is a man of his word, he can point to this 48" stainless steel Klingon sword of honor.



3. Star Trek Interactive Tribbles

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This lovable creature can calm humanoids as it purrs them into a state of nirvana. Be forewarned, tribbles are known to multiply faster than rabbits in Australia. What? That was a crazy epidemic. You should bone up on your invasive species world history.






2. Star Trek Master Replica Klingon Disruptor

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When the Klingon battle takes more than a dryer sheet, this is the perfect blaster for any guy. This Star Trek Master Replica Klingon Disruptor is modeled after a 17th Century single-shot flintlock pistol, and plays the memorable "sonic warble" when fired.








1. Star Trek Classic Captain Kirk Chair Replica

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The holy grail of Star Trek collectibles. This full-scale replica of Captain Kirk's chair from the original Star Trek series is designed after detailed blueprints from Paramount Studios. Complete with original light switches and sounds, this throne of geekitude weighs in at 215 lbs.





The Womanization of Jerry O'Connell

Posted April 23, 2009 11:47 AM

If you think Womanization can't Happen to you, think again

OConnell_image_A.jpgIt deeply saddens us to inform men everywhere that Jerry O'Connell appears to be afflicted by the early stages of womanization. O'Connell - married to the supermodel Rebecca Romijn for just under a year - appeared on the Howard Stern Show yesterday, and the interview was a chilling confirmation that yet another young man appears to be in the clutches of this terrible affliction. Let's consider some telltale signs that O'Connell is evolving into a delicate flower:

Jerry Now




What makes Jerry's case tragic is how quickly his masculinity appears to be slipping away. Just two years ago, O'Connell was an informal spokesman for the gender. Someone other guys looked up to. A rugged leader among men.

Jerry was a guy's guy. The type who fit in with just about any red-blooded group of American men. Listening to an interview with O'Connell was confirmation of this. His relaxed and congenial mentality kept our short male attention spans engaged without annoying the holy hell out of us.

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Sure, O'Connell keeps up on his sports, especially the holy grail of masculine entertainment that is pro football. And sure, Jerry's still into beer like most of us, but changes are already appearing on the horizon. It won't be long before Jerry chooses recorded episodes of "The View" over the beloved ritual of Sunday football.

There's still hope for Jerry at this point. His fate lies in the hands of his wife Rebecca. Unfortunately for guys everywhere, her hands are currently gripped tightly around his balls, and those clenched fists don't appear to be getting any looser. Now Jerry's womanly evolution seems to be accelerating at an alarming rate. Even the manliest gifts for guys might not save O'Connell from rapid decent into womanization.

Bludgeoning your beefsteak in the kitchen is fine if you're preparing dinner. Otherwise, a guy shouldn't have to run around his own place of residence to find a suitable spot to beat the bishop. And rarely is the kitchen a suitable spot for such a deed. Can you really blame the poor guy? It's punishment enough for a man to be constantly denied sex. But for O'Connell, who is in the presence of a "Sports Illustrated" cover girl day and night, denying him sex and whack off rights verges on cruel and unusual.

Time will tell whether Rebecca can loosen her suffocating grip. If she doesn't, Jerry will be ordering wine coolers instead of beer before even Rebecca knows what she has done. By then, Jerry will be too far gone. For guys everywhere, one can only pray that this young man realizes the treacherous path he is on before it is too late.

Who Says these Guys Didn't have Balls?

Posted April 17, 2009 2:34 PM

From Cold-Blooded Assassins to Cunning Political Diplomats, these Chinese Men had the Right Stuff

Who says it takes cojones to rule an empire?  These ruthless Chinese guys used all that pent up frustration to either rule or come darn close to ruling the Empires under which they were born. How did they do it?  Let's just say these neutered usurpers managed to get their names etched into the history books with the levels of deception and cunning that would put Machiavelli to shame.

 

Still, for all that power, none of them had enough clout to edit out the sterile details of their past. If history is all about learning lessons, then these Chinese attendants teach us that Asian Empires knew no scorn like that of their surgically altered sopranos.

5. Li Fuguo

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Alive during the Tang Dynasty, Li Fuguo used his skills managing the royal stables to persuaded his way up the political ladder.  In 759, Li Fuguo convinced Emperor Suzong that the Emperor's highest-ranking commander - Li Xian - was planning to usurp him.  The rumor was believable enough to prompt the Emperor's exile of Li Xian. In turn, Suzong promoted Li Fuguo to the esteemed position of ministry of defense.

Later, when Li Fuguo learned of the Empress Zhang's plots to have him killed, he beat her to the punch and successfully plotted her assassination. The Empress's murder caused a wave of anxiety throughout the palace, and most attendants fled in fear for what was to come.  Emperor Suzong - who was ill when the Empress was killed - died without the care of his palace servants.

 

As you can imagine, all of this was the beginning of the end for Li Fuguo.  Keeping title and power when Emperor Daizong rose to power, his arrogance had gotten the better of him.  Li's appetite for power made the Emperor distrustful of Fuguo's pledge to serve him, and Daizong plotted his eventual assassination.

 

4.  Zhao Gao

This guy was the actual motivation for the Chinese decision to stop snipping their male attendants nether regions.  With no title and less influence, Zhao had the gall to commit a crime punishable by death as a young man.  He was only pardoned because the Emperor recognized Zhao's resourcefulness in the art of massacring his enemies.  Zhao Gao wasn't just a cold-blooded assassin, he brought creativity and passion to his work. The process Zhao used to kill his victims was later popularized throughout China, becoming known as the 'five pains'.  Sounds like a kung-fu move? This was worse.  Zhao's trademark style was to cut off the nose, arm and foot of his victim first, then he'd finish the job by cutting his victim in half at the waste.

 

Zhao must have resented having his testicles taken from him at such an early age, because he murdered the Emperor responsible - Li Si - and continued to massacre his family line, killing member's of the Emperor's kin as far removed as three generations.  These bloody political moves did not go unnoticed, and Zhao's entire family line was also later executed as retaliation.

Whoever said testosterone explains male violence never heard of this Chinese assassin.  Zhao was living proof that personal resentment breeds more violence then male hormones ever could.

If you don't believe Zhao's violence was a result of his history, consider this: his "five pains" method of torture included the victim's front row ticket his own castration.  Just the finishing touches to Zhao's sadistic, angry, and generally screwed up existence.  Imagine the scorched earth this guy would've left behind if he'd been fully equipped? Now that's a scary thought.

 

3. Li Lianying

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Zhao could have learned a lot from the quieter, and ultimately more successful, Li Lianying.  Li lived during the Qing Dynasty - around the time of the mid 19th century - and got in good with the Empress Dowager Cixi - who was the de facto ruler of China for much of his life.  For the forty odd years that she ruled, Li Lianying carried the title of Head Eunuch.

Despite his easy going demeanor, Lianying proved to be a cunning politician.  He was a powerful figure in Chinese court affairs during his early lifetime, and he later served as the Empire's only access to the Empress.  Lianying used the role to his advantage, amassing a fortune in bribes from wealthy lords requesting audiences with their ruler.  If Zhao was the eunuch from hell, Lianying was the opposite - a trustworthy, docile servant, loyally devoted to his Empress.  The fact that his service to the Empress also made him obscenely wealthy surely didn't hinder Li's lifelong devotion to cause and country.

 

2. Zhang Rang

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A member of the Han dynasty around the turn of the 1st century, Rang's biography reads like a warning to those whose expectations reach beyond their physical shortcomings. Zhang's politically skilled life was ultimately what led to his demise.  His skills in the courtroom landed him a head role overseeing the Han Dynasty court.  He established a powerful group of ten other court eunuchs.

All was well until the Emperor died and his son took power.  Suddenly, Zhang Rang was without the Emperor for whom he'd built his career loyally serving.  The new young Emperor saw the older Zhang Rang as a threat to his own rule.  It wasn't long before Zhang Rang was under the chopping block, literally.  Rang left this world much the way he entered it - with a severed appendage.  Except this time, the appendage was his head.  Rang may have been the smartest eunuch of this group, but he failed to realize that no emperor with his avocados intact is ever going to trust a guy they themselves were responsible for castrating.

1. Gao Lishi

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In the world of ball-less power struggles, survival is what wins you the top spot. Gao Lishi mastered survival, crafting it into his own personal art form.  Of our five frustrated political tacticians and resentful practitioner's of death, Gao Lishi was the only one who died peacefully, succumbing to old age at 78.  Gao held a position in Chinese politics over the span of Empress Dowager Wu's rule and over the course of three other Emperors.

 

How was he so successful?  Lishi was exceedingly careful, often holding his tongue when he disagreed with a powerful leader's decision.  Lishi crafted what became a vast network of political alliances across multiple ruling lines - a tactic which allowed him to stay alive when power shifted hands. Whatever he did, Gao was damn good at it.  He stayed in royal palace life his entire life, making smart moves whenever a controversial or unstable time appeared at the horizon.

His loyalty and subservience paid off, and Gao Lishi lived a long and prosperous - albeit platonic - life.  Though his story is not as sensational as the other eunuch's on this list, I'd bet every one of them would have happily traded places with the comfortable and long life of Lishi.

Ironically, Gao's loyalty was the indirect cause of his demise. He was reported to have spat up blood and collapse upon hearing that Emperor Xuanzong and the newly appointed Emperor Suzong had died months within one another.


10 Tiny Animals that Could Kick Your Ass

Posted March 27, 2009 1:30 PM

You think you're the toughest guy in the room? Get in the ring with one of these vicious animals and let's see how tough you really are. Remember, appearances can be deceiving.

10 tiny animals that could totally kick your ass:

box-jellyfish.jpg10. Box Jellyfish - Weighing in at 4.5 pounds, this translucent jellyfish from Australia carries a heavyweight title: "world's most venomous marine animal known." It is capable of killing more people than sharks, stonefish, and crocodiles combined. Finisher: Watch the tentacles. The box jelly fish has 5,000 stinging cells on its tentacles and getting within 10 feet of the fish could be fatal. But the pacifist box jellyfish doesn't attack. You'll only die if you try to rub elbows with it.

amoeba.jpg9. Amoeba - To quote the Flight of the Conchords "with poisonous gasses, they'll poison your asses." In other words, don't mess with the amoeba. That primitive blob packs a powerful punch. Finisher: Research shows that some amoebas harbor bacteria for deadly infections including Legoinaires' Disease and cholera. Amoebas slinking across your contact lens can cause extremely painful eye infections and even blindness.

670px-Mosquito_2007-2.jpg8. Mosquito - Everyone thinks they know how to beat the minuscule mosquito. Just grab the fly swatter. But this pest is responsible for deaths worldwide. Finisher: Mosquitoes do more than just draw blood and leave itchy red bumps. They spread fatal diseases, including West Nile, Dengue fever, and malaria. (Picture by Alvesgaspar.)


Thumbnail image for poison dart frog.jpg7. Poison dart frog - Ugly and brown, pick it up. Vibrant blue or yellow, almost irresistibly cute? Leave it be. Poison dart frogs get their name because indigenous Amerindians poisoned the tips of blowdarts with this frog's toxic secretions. Finisher: It releases batrachotoxin that blocks neuromuscular transmission, resulting in muscle paralysis or death. (Picture by Rolf Kolasch.)


Thumbnail image for blue ring octopus.JPG6. Blue Ring Octopus - No bigger than a golf ball, the blue ring octopus hides out in tide pools in the Pacific Ocean from Japan to Australia. You don't want to come across this blue-ringed beauty. Finisher: Deadly venom tetrodotxin. It blocks sodium channels in the body, leading quickly to cardiac arrest. (Picture by Jens Petersen).


Thumbnail image for Black_Widow_11-06.jpg5. Black Widow Spider - Every guy knows not to mess with this lady. Clocking in at only 1.5 inches in length, she's the deadliest spider in North America. Finisher: If prompted, she bites and injects her victims with venom. The venom travels through the bloodstream, causing swelling and intense pain. One knockout punch from this little lady and you're headed to the emergency room. And you thought your wife was mean. (Picture by Chepyle).


bombadier beetle.jpg4. Bombardier Beetle - Even Napoleon's army couldn't handle this beetle - when crossing the Pyrenees, his soldiers ended up with burns on their skin from this feisty little bugger. Finisher: This beetle comes equipped with an incredible weapon - a pseudo flame thrower. When the beetle is in danger, a chemical reaction takes place inside its body, and it will fire liquid through its anus, up to a distance of 30 cm. Watch out, the bombardier beetle has incredible accuracy. Forget the guard dog - where can we get an ass-kicking, flame-throwing bombardier beetle? (Picture by Patrick Coin).

lion fish.jpg3. Lion Fish - Truly magnificent, the lion fish almost begs you to touch those floating fins. But don't. The lion fish is one of the most venomous fish on the ocean floor. And it doesn't like to be touched. Finisher: This is not Nemo. When hunting, the lion fish corners prey and uses quick reflexes to swallow it whole. When threatened, they face their attackers in a head-down position and use their deadly spines as a weapon. (Photo by Jens Peterson).

800px-Gila_monster2.JPG2. Gila Monster - If you live in the Southwest, you might be familiar with the gila monster. As far as lizards go, the gila fits into the heavyweight category. This slow moving lizard is like your lazy friend who never gets off the couch. It poses little threat to humans. However, the gila monster is the only venomous lizard native to the United States and earned quite a reputation around town. Finisher: This lizard is as tenacious as a pit bull with venom as toxic as a rattlesnake. If it bites, it holds on for dear life. The venom can cause excruciating pain and weakness. Best to leave this little lizard sun bathing on its rock.

YellowtailRockfish.jpg1. RockFish - This creature looks like your run-of-the-mill bass. As dainty and feckless and it might appear, it's truly a bad ass. Nicknamed the scorpion fish, it sports a mohawk of sharp, poisonous dorsal spines. Finisher: Many, many poisonous spines. Get stuck with one of its spines and your fishing trip is over.

Ready to start shopping? Check out our wide selection of gifts for guys at GuyVille.


Back From The Brink!

Posted February 19, 2009 8:29 AM

Oh man, this is EVERY guy's worst fear. I've had a heart attack, I'm in a coma, and my fate rests in my wife's hands. Is she going to pull the plug, and move on with her life, or is she going to give me every opportunity to survive. This just happened in California. The North County Times just did an article on Mike Connelly, 56, from Vista California. After a 96 hour ordeal, the family tearfully ordered that the plug be pulled. Connelly's heart had stopped, and after repeated attempts and an incredible 10 minutes later, they were able to get it going again. Ten minutes is a long time. Nobody expected that he could recover from that.

So, just as the order was put in by the family and scripture quoting was finished, he began to respond to his name being called.

I can only try to put myself in his shoes. And of course, if this was my wife making the final decision, it would sound something like this. I'm in a coma...I hear her say, well, Guyville Guy was a helluva guy. We'll miss him. Joe you make the funeral arrangements, Grandma, you order the food for the wake, and we can have this guy in the dirt by 10am on Thursday. I just want to make sure it doesn't mess up my trip to Hawaii, because I made those plans a long time ago, and I am NOT changing my itinerary. You see, this is the precise reason why you have to always think about how you treat your spouse. If you treat her like dog crap, this is what is going to come up and bite you in the ass. It will either be this, or you'll get bit by a snake on the golf course, and by the time you get to the hospital, you'll be completely paralyzed. Some intern doctor will come in the room, his pre-pubescent voice cracking and say, "Well, this guy isn't ever going to be the same, your choices are--" to which your wife, if you've been a prick, will whip up some fake tears and blurt out, "Oh, just pull the plug. He'd have wanted it anyway, no one deserves to live like this. Boo hooo hoooo!" Now you'd be screaming to yourself, "I'm fine, I just can't move is all. Give me ten minutes, and I'll get it together! C'mon man!"

So the moral of the story is...be kind to your wife. Buy her flowers...don't sleep with the housekeeper, and she'll give you at least two weeks on the respirator. It seems like a great insurance policy to me.

Happy Valentine's Day! Go Get Some Love!

Posted February 14, 2009 7:57 AM

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Valentine's Day is one of those bitter sweet holidays that many love and many hate. If it's a young couple in love and they are celebrating their first Valentine's Day together, then it's an occasion to be celebrated, well thought out and a memory that will be cherished as long as they are together. Phrases will follow that relationship that begin, "Hey, remember that first Valentine's Day we were together?" Valentine's Day is a great occasion for the hopeless romantic. However, that same couple that has been together for ten years or so has probably lost a little bit of that February 14th magic. Maybe because they've been there, done that in years past...or more than likely when you hit that level of comfort that comes with couples with a long history, it's simply a matter of familiarity. What I mean by that is, quite simply, "she's heard all my b.s. already and there is nothing new to share, so why go all out on this lame holiday that suckers schmucks like me into buying more crap that she doesn't need?

The answer may come in a well thought out and nicely written card. Lovers never tire of hearing what draws their partner to them. Sixty years can go by and you can write a simple card to her about how amazing her eyes are, and how they guided you into her arms right from the start, and she will be touched. So, it's not necessarily about running out to the grocery store, drug store, or flower mart to shove some daisies in her face just to let her know that you didn't forget. No, it's about getting in touch with what made you fall in love in the first place. So, this morning as you wake up and make each other coffee, don't 'dis the day and act as if it's a pain in the butt. Instead, look into the eyes...look far and deep, and share a kiss that is more than just a peck. Always remember that all important first Valentine's Day that made you fall in love in the first place.

Last Chance For Great Valentine's Day Guy Gifts

Posted February 9, 2009 3:23 PM

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Let's face it. It's February 9th and it's really the last chance for you to buy him his personalized bad to the bone Valentine's day gift and have it shipped to him in time for his eyes to light up and plant a big one right on your lips. We put some of our hottest sellers on sale at 10% off in our Valentine's Day section and we've made some pretty good suggestions. Stuff you may have missed, however, our Tequila Personalized Humidor complete with a live bull! Okay, that last part is, well, bull but he will absolutely love this humidor with all of its testosterone glory.

Does he have a genuine clay composite, really magnificently designed and on top of all of that, personalized Poker Set? If not, then porque estas esperando? That's Espanol for, "what the heck are you waiting for?" Guys poker night is a disappearing phenomenon that must be stopped immediately. This might be your chance to save humanity, one gambler at a time. If a guy is going to gamble then at least let him do it in the comfort of his own home...losing everything but the deed to the house to his dearest friends.

And Valentine's Day wouldn't be complete without a thoughtful gift like our Personalized Wine Glasses. It's a romantic holiday and these are really thoughtful, and yes, manly (enough) gifts for the guys you really care about. So pour the Two Buck Chuck and make a toast to him for all the things that make him so special to you...leaving the toilet seat up, of course, is never one of them. But we'll forgive that as we sip on our cab, pinot noir, and never ever merlot! From all of us to all of you, we wish you a happy and safe and wonderful Valentine's Day!

Valentine's Day gifts for men

Posted February 6, 2009 12:29 PM

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It's that time of year again, and I can already hear the guys perusing this blog saying, "Has Guyville Guy lost his mind? A Personalized Key Chain Locket is on his "strong recommend" Valentine's Day guy gifts list? To that I respond, "Easy pal, or I'll have to sick my mini-toy poodle, Spike on you." All right we admit it, it might seem a bit, well...sentimental, but isn't that what Valentine's Day is all about? It's not always about thumping your chest and asking for Licensed NFL and MLB Signs, right? RIGHT? Take a hint from a guy who is clearly in touch with his gay, er, effeminate side. It's not. Hey, we were yelling and screaming during the Superbowl. We just watched an awesome Lakers/Celtics overtime game last night as a matter of fact...and there was beer and bratwursts damn it! We get it. But let's face facts, this holiday has never been about him...(um, that means you, sir). It's about her. Always was, always will be. So if that's the case, then put this on your list of gifts that she can buy for you. Let her know that you'll keep a picture of you both, always near you wherever you go. Tell her that...and then drop me a comment in the morning and let me know how it worked out for you. Sometimes you've just got to try to think one step ahead. It doesn't always have to be about instant gratification. That's what separates us from monkeys. Although...judging from a lot of you out there...we've still got work to do.

Oh, and until that stimulus check gets approved and a rebate, or whatever it's going to be shows up in your mailbox, we've got you covered with our Valentine's Day gifts for Him on sale until Feb. 15th for 10% off! Oh, and don't worry...there's some manly gifts on that list, just in case you weren't feeling the touchy, feely, sentimental suggestion I was doling out. Now get out there and pound some Jagermeister, damn it!

Christian Bale Goes Bonkers on Set!

Posted February 3, 2009 9:03 AM

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He...could...go...all...the...way! All the way ballistic, that is. In this audio clip posted on the TMZ website, Bale can be heard absolutely berating the Director of Photography for walking in the background behind his co-star during filming. I listened to this clip four times and shook my head at the absolute tantrum this joker (notice the play on words) pulled. You might listen to this and wonder how he could get away with such reckless abuse of another human being. Well, he does it because he can. I mean, what are they going to do, fire Bale or fire an easy-to-replace DP? Replacing Bale would cost millions of dollars. Replacing a DP would cost nothing. So, give a douchebag like Bale that much power and just sit back and watch what he's capable of. You thinking about a career move into the entertainment industry? You might want to re-think that after investing two minutes of your time listening to this tape. Sadly, Bale isn't the only A-list actor prone to tantrums. It happens more often than you think, and mostly without any repercussions to the offending actor. Except...now, in the age of the internet, Bale's jack-assery will make the rounds to millions of households. Truly, that is the only thing that can keep guys like this under control. The fear of his beloved fans hearing what he is truly like when (he thinks) the camera isn't rolling. Kudos to whomever had the wherewithal to put this fantastic clip online. Does Bale really think he's a superhero? My guess is, he'll pick on the wrong person one day, and realize that he's no Batman. I only wish that the DP he picked on would have sacrificed his job and socked Bale right in the eye. Well, one day it'll happen, and I sure hope the cameras and audio are secretly rolling once more when it does.

The Ten Commandments of Fatherhood (Part 5)

Posted January 23, 2009 8:57 AM

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(continued from the Ten Commandments of Fatherhood (Part IV)

COMMANDMENT NUMBER 3: THOU SHALT RELATE TO YOUR CHILDREN

Now the first two commandments have incorporated an awful lot of marital tales and advice and this is, after all, a book on fatherhood not marriage. Being a parent often involves people being in some sort of committed relationship either with the wife that bore your child, or a new wife or girlfriend or if you are gay, then your partner. Whatever the case may be, there is still a balance to be struck and if there is a child or children involved in your lives then this should all be relatable material. If you're not with the person who gave you this child and if you are single, then save this material for when you are in a relationship. The hardships and difficulties are always there and you will always need to find your balance.

RELATING TO YOUR CHILDREN

On the surface this seems easy. It's my kid...I can relate to her. It's your kid, but can you remember growing up? Do you remember wanting to watch cartoons, but getting to do so seemed like such a privilege. Do you remember wishing that your folks had told you more stories? Read you more books? Let you eat more Fruity Pebbles? Told you they loved you at least once or twice? We all have issues relating to our children and it manifests itself into feeling obligated to do thing "the kid wants to do" and not necessarily what you want to be doing. Let's face it, do you really want to go to the place where they paint the clay figurines? Are you dying to hit that awesome Monkey and Me gymnasium class again? And are you seriously pumped about going to that Sunday dance recital when you know that all your buddies are watching da Bears battle it out with da Skins for NFL dominance? My guess is that your answer is no, no and oh, hell no! Is this relating business making a bit more sense to you? Now, if you're like most of us dads, you are proud, you've got your video camera ready to catch those pinnacle moments and you're okay with the notion that every other Saturday you're going to be at some strangers house celebrating their kid's birthday soiree. But, how do you do these things and really relate to your kid and not go to that nasty place of, "Man I sacrifice a lot of things." This is not as easy as it seems. Too often we find ourselves distracted on the computer (an easy excuse escape. You ever use the, "Man I got so much work to do still tonight." So you can escape into cyberspace and get away from it all?). We find ourselves watching our seventeen favorite television shows that we have Tivo'd - a never ending cycle of being behind in our viewing. And lastly there was the image that I'll never forget at work one day, when Oliver was sitting at his desk at 7pm zoning out whilst listening to his ITunes. I said, "Oliver, get the hell out of here and go home man. What are you still doing here?" His response was, "Art, I've got four kids at home. I like the peace." His plan was that he'd show up at around 8pm just in time to give good night kisses.
Ideas for relating: These wouldn't be the commandments if we didn't offer some potential solutions for you.

(Up Next: The Solutions! Stay Tuned!)

MLK Day, Obama and A New Beginning

Posted January 20, 2009 6:48 AM

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This isn't meant to be biased in any way about the incoming president vs the outgoing president, and it's not about policy, taxes or partisanship. This is about a new beginning in a time in our lifetimes where a new beginning has likely never been more welcomed. Even if you can't stand Bush, and even if it were McCain who was preparing his speech, you'd have hope that there would be a new beginning. We need one. Simple as that. With that being said, it is kind of interesting that our Nation's first black president will come to power on the day after we celebrate the accomplishments of a black person who had likely the most profound effect on civil rights in our country to date. I have no idea what Obama's speech will be about. Will it be about the audacity of hope? Will it be about the impossible coming true? Or will it be about his plans for the future and how he will incorporate all of us to be a part of it like never before? At the end of his first term what will our homes be worth? How many miles per gallon will your car get, or will it be running on hydrogen cells or algae? Will he prove simply a great orator, or will he take action, be bold and somehow unite the countries who seem to scoff at us now? Can he somehow unite the red and the blue states in his own country? Will Obama ever find Osama? In 2012 will there be a peaceful Israel and (pick a middle eastern country)? Will it prove prudent to sit down with our nation's enemies, or will it prove dangerous and naive? Is his experience as a "community organizer" going to end up being his most profound ability and important experience in trying to organize the world? Will you be able to buy a Ford or a Chevy? Will the icebergs stop their rapid retreat?

There are so many questions out there. The moment is coming in less than an hour and a half. Whether you voted for the man or not, it will be an historic experience today. We hope for his safety. We hope for a great turnaround to this rotten economy. We stand here as witnesses to history, and hope that the new president of the United States of America will be able to connect in some way to each and every one of us. We hope for a better future for our children. We hope that the spat of 'end of the world' films coming out will just be the fleeting 'end of the world' mentality that everyone has been feeling, and perhaps we'll see a resurgence in romantic comedies. We hope for peace and an end to a very long war. We hope for more relaxation and less stress. We hope for more laughter and less anguish. We hope for a future with no smog. We hope for the possibility of loving everyone of all walks of life. We hope.

Valentines Day Gifts for Him

Posted January 15, 2009 12:59 PM

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I know...she's hot. I'm tired of getting in fights at the clubs defending her honor from guys trying to hit on my girl all the time. "Go get your own honey!" She makes a good point in this picture too, guys, don't just settle for buying chocolate for your girls this year! Chances are if they are cruising this site, they are going to hook you up with the coolest in Personalized gifts for men for the big day, and you're going to feel pretty lame if you give her a store bought box of chocolates to go with your store bought card that is tossed into a store bought bunch of wilting carnations!



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If she's half as cool as you think she is, then she's going to cruise over to our Personalized Licensed Sports Signs section and hook you up with some of the coolest signs you've ever seen, and you're going to love it, and then you'll instantly feel like a tool when you give her a subpar gift that required no imagination. Let's face it, imagination = an investment of your time and an investment of your time = you care. You could make her an origami swan out of 4th grade construction paper, and she'd likely cherish it because you took your time to make something. Note...don't give her an origami swan! I'm just making a point. The bottom line is she's perusing this cool site to give you a cool gift, we're simply imploring you to do the same.


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Now, if sports isn't your bag, that's not a problem. She knows you inside and out. Perhaps your a Grilling Guy. We've got her covered in getting you exactly what you'll love this year. Psst, a little secret from us to you, she's not going to pay a ton, but the idea is that you'll be so blown away by the presentation of our Welded Heatbacker Steak Brand that you won't care that she didn't blow hundreds of dollars on you. It's personalized, it rocks, and that's what we're here for.

So consider yourself warned. Buy her something cool, because that's exactly what she's going to do for you this year. We're the place to go this year for Valentine's Day gifts for men and she'll have hundreds of great guy gifts to choose from. So forget the chocolate and paper mache...have fun shopping and drop us a line if you need any suggestions. That's what we're here for. Oh, and happy Valentines Day!

The Ten Commandments of Fatherhood (Part 4)

Posted January 11, 2009 7:18 PM

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(continued from the Ten Commandments of Fatherhood Part III)

Those four pesky marriage busters!

a. You have no life, because you didn't keep your balance. You fell off the hose, big guy. You have no life because you didn't understand or accept that there would be changes. You needed that guys' night out every single week so you could keep it together, but did you offer her a girls' night out? I'm betting you didn't. Guess what? For three hours you can feed, bathe and put little pie pie to sleep. You want certain things, you give it up on the other end. She'll come around, I promise you.

b. My wife changed, there's no joy in her eyes - the answer of where the joy went resides in two teeny tiny words and a big word. SHE - IS...EXHAUSTED! Let me screech to a halt because I can feel you saying to yourself, "This guy is playing for the wrong team. He's backing her up every time." WRONG...and stop calling me an ass-kisser - I have eyes and ears in the back of my head. The truth is I have been there and I implemented these colossal commandments and I live by them. Now if you've attempted to create proper balance in the past and have offered things, or if it simply hasn't turned out how you wanted it to, there are a few items to take into consideration. If it's soon after the baby was born, say the first year, then she's dealing with hormone issues, likely has a baby attached to her boob and her nipples are killing her, is postpartum, isn't getting any sleep and hasn't since her second tri-mester, is trying to get back to work with her job as we're almost all dual incomes these days, and the list goes on and on. You've made sacrifices too. You haven't slept much yourself. Try shaking up your shifts, and make it equal. If Mom pumps her milk then try to take an entire night or at least three quarters of an entire night and feed the baby yourself. Sleep deprivation is a killer! My wife was dust by nine am before I even got to work. Balance, balance, balance! What does she do, or does she dread doing at this point in her life? Take it off her plate. Make a simple three-dollar investment in massage oil or body lotion and get after her feet. Think that's crazy? Try giving her a foot massage every day for a week. Then drop me an email and let me know if that did any good for you.

c. I don't want to be that asshole who stayed...Guess what, you're a bigger asshole if you leave. You think that grass is greener too, doncha? I know you do. I know you see those twenty five year old girls at the office and you'd love to give them a go. You're older, wiser, somehow even maybe a little more distinguished and better looking...your wife has heard all your old bullshit before, so your stories don't entertain her like they used to. But these girls are fresh, they're hot, they look up to you...and they aren't afraid of that ring on your chubby little finger. Guys give in to this too often. In fact dealing with all the stress at home the idea of having split custody and half of your life back so you can be a full time adult half the time is quite possibly becoming a fantasy. Don't go down that road. Get on the hose, get balanced and put that energy into good use at home. I haven't met a small kid yet that hasn't been somehow traumatized by the split of their parents. Listen, Dad, you are God to your children. You are larger than life, you're what they look up to, aspire to be like and your departure for half of their life until they are eighteen is beyond devastating. Don't downplay it in your mind. You are Superman, Spiderman and Aquaman and Michael Jordan all piled up into one balding, graying, pudgy alpha male. Try an exercise. A female intern came up to me in an elevator after I'd changed into my gym clothes at the office. She playfully touched my leg and said, "You have really great legs for an old married guy." You don't have to be a moron do you? Hello Pandora, oh, and how's your box? In a stroke of rare genius, I went home and said to my wife, "You know, you've been looking great lately. Have you been secretly working out?" Well, I knew she hadn't...she knew she hadn't, and secretly she looked exactly the same to me, but you should have seen how she puffed out her chest, sucked in her tummy and said, "Really?" That ended up begin a very, very special night. It's sort of like the guys who occasionally go to strip clubs and then go home and make passionate sexy time with their wives. There might be something to that. So in review on this excuse. Asshole = you leaving.

d. We fell out of love, now I wonder if we were ever in love. Note to you buddy boy. You were in love. Your love has evolved into a "you don't do enough, and I've got to do it all" fiasco. Remember your trips before the baby came? Remember the first time you kissed each other? Did you see the film, "Knocked Up?" They weren't even in love! The bottom line is that you likely were in love have somehow felt emasculated at some points in your relationship and now with a screaming, beautiful blob of madness, you are completely out of balance. You will likely always love your child. I've never met a parent male or female who has said (or at least confessed) that they don't love or no longer love their child. Never once. No, the suffering and sacrifice comes at the expense of your marriage. Oh, and by the way, even if you're not officially married, for the sake of this book, if you've conceived a child together, consider yourself married. The fact that you don't have that piece of paper doesn't make you any less married, any less bound, any less responsible, or any less a part of the team. Here's a solution to this problem, and believe me I have been there and used this excuse in my head. When things were at their absolute worst in my marriage and in another stunning moment of clarity that seemed beyond me, I found myself calling an extremely expensive spa and resort. Now frugal is usually my middle name. I've also overheard people mumble, "tightass, cheap-o and jesus h, is he going to whip out the calculator to split this bill?" So that should paint a scenario of my normal personality for you as I called the reservation clerk, stuck out my chest and said with some authority, "How much for your most expensive suite?" - the reply was, "That's our Shangri La presidential suite, Mr. Altounian and it's thirty-five hundred per night." Long pause as I gather myself and continue with slightly less authority, "How much is your second most expensive suite?" Well, the second most expensive suite was seven hundred per night. In a very 'unlike me' moment I booked it for three nights. I didn't spare any expense with the spa selections either. I booked us hot stone massages, cold stone massages, mud baths, seaweed wraps and a bunch of other gooky crap I can't remember. In the real world, in the place that we men reside, a trip like this that cost me roughly five grand for three nights (I threw down on a convertible Bimmer rental...that part was for me) isn't exactly something that we'd plan for ourselves. I can think of five hundred other ways I could spend that money. But the truth is, it was one of the best trips of my life. We went from marriage is on serious, jagged, hanging off a cliff rocks to - I'm looking at you again. I'm seeing how beautiful your hazel eyes are. I want to take you back to the hotel room after we finish off this two hundred dollar bottle of wine and show you who you fell in love with and why. That my friends...is getting back on that god-forsaken rubber hose and rediscovering your balance! Answer to the question...you fell out of love, not sure if you were ever in love. Answer = do something that she's always wanted to do...no matter how simple or difficult and see how great it makes you feel too.

Up Next...COMMANDMENT NUMBER 3: THOU SHALT RELATE TO YOUR CHILDREN (stay tuned!)

The Ten Commandments of Fatherhood (Part 3)

Posted January 9, 2009 9:54 AM

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(continued from the Ten Commandments of Fatherhood Part II)

COMMANDMENT NUMBER 2 - THOU MUST ALWAYS KEEP YOUR BALANCE

I'd love for you to get on a balance beam. If you haven't got one, chances are you have a thick garden hose. Stretch it out across your front yard, take off your shoes and try to walk all the way across it. It will likely take you a few times to get the hang of it. Nothing comes immediately and practice makes perfect as they say. The same is true of becoming a new father. One of the biggest demands to parenting is finding the perfect balance between your newfound responsibility to your child, your time commitment to your job and your wife, and at least partial retention of the independence that made your life exciting and fun before that 8 pound beauty was brought into your world. So many parents absolutely freak out and lose it those first two years. When my wife was pregnant with our daughter, Samantha, everyone told us, "Having a child is so wonderful. It's so perfect, in fact, that you'll never remember your life before her." Hmmm...well, in reality, that wasn't entirely true for me and likely isn't true for most men. The best advice I got was from a single father who had a three year-old daughter and he told me, "Having a child is the single hardest, greatest thing you'll do in your entire life." A couple of years later I understood his meaning entirely. It is precisely both of those things. My wife will claim that, "she doesn't do babies very well." When she says this I'm always amazed to hear other women respond with total agreement. They don't either! My first piece of advice is, DO COMMANDMENT 1 BEFORE PROCEEDING TO COMMANDMENT 2. Scarier still is the amount of small children - like two to four years old whose parents are split up. It's close to forty percent! For many of them this is their second child and it's the straw that broke...well you know the expression. I know some of these guys. I ask the question constantly, "What happened? What went wrong." You want to hear the four main answers? Enjoy...

a. I have no life.
b. She (my wife) changed. No sex, no time, no joy in her eyes anymore, and I'm always the bad guy.
c. I love my kid more than anything in the world. But my wife and I have absolutely nothing in common and I don't want to be the asshole that stays married for the kid.
d. We fell out of love. Now I'm wondering if we ever even were in love.

Sometimes it's a combination of all four things with some others sprinkled in. Here's a commandment key for those four pesky marriage busters.

(to be continued. Up next, those four pesky marriage busters)...

The Ten Commandments of Fatherhood (Part 2)

Posted January 8, 2009 11:56 AM

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(Continued from The Ten Commandments of Fatherhood Part 1)
New Dads will truly have to write this history themselves. NOW. TODAY. It's a pressing issue. If you've spent much time in the presence of parents with young children you may see a disturbing trend. Both parents adore their child/children, but they've grown impatient with each other. "I changed the last diaper, so it's your turn to change this one" can manifest itself into, "I just don't love you anymore" extremely quickly. We've all seen it. The divorce numbers are staggering.

So how do we circumvent this unhappy ending? How can we truly parent on a fifty-fifty basis successfully and without laying blame? Clearly we both earn the money and are both responsible for keeping the roof overhead. So what do we do? The answer is quite simple.

The solution to this problem lies squarely on the shoulders of Dad. Dad, if you take the initiative, though it's truly not in your nature to do so, but if you take the initiative to change baby when she's dirty, empty the diaper genie when it starts to get ripe, toss that ragamuffin in the tub when he's been playing in the sandbox, you'd be well on your way to creating marital bliss. Instinctively you know what needs to be done, but because it's been programmed in you for eons that it's Mom's job, you either wait until she handles it, or wait until she nags at you to do it, and then you're both unhappy.

Have fun co-parenting your child. While you're taking this new-found initiative, throw the dirty dishes in the dishwasher too. It may sound funny, but you'll discover a strange thing begin to occur - Mom won't be so exhausted all the time and she'll show you an appreciation the likes of which you haven't seen since your honeymoon. You'll begin to feel great about giving her a necessary breather AND you'll realize that you are indeed an excellent father. And most importantly, you'll be creating a lifetime, lasting bond with your child like you could have never imagined. Granted, this is not the Dr. Phil show, however, we are at a time when we are writing history as we go. We are still in a learning phase as to how to go about co-parenting on an equal basis, but if you embrace the responsibility, Dad, instead of trying to hide from it, you, as the patriarch of your family will be light years ahead of most - for now anyway.

Up Next - Chapter 2:

COMMANDMENT NUMBER 2 - THOU MUST ALWAYS KEEP YOUR BALANCE

(to be continued)...

The Ten Commandments of Fatherhood (Part 1)

Posted January 7, 2009 9:10 PM

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The following blog will be an ongoing Guyville series on the trials, tribulations and joys of fatherhood and hopefully a humorous education offering some fun insight into how fatherhood and the roles of the patriarch have changed in the last couple of generations. My qualifications to write this are simple. I've been married for over ten years. I have procreated. I have ridden the ride and during my ten years of marriage I had suffered a bit at certain pinnacle times during our history together. Ultimately at a point where my marriage appeared to be history I began to live these commandments, slowly and steadily and years later I've come to a place that I didn't know could exist for me. And that's a really really awesome place on any given day (which is, in all honesty, about eighty percent of the time - let's face it, anyone who is euphoric on a daily basis is Ned Flanders, and nobody wants to be Ned Flanders!) It wasn't always this way as I was clearly always a man's man. Everyone understands what that means and I had to go through, and am still discovering along the journey of marriage and fatherhood - that there are changes and sacrifices from our end (yeah, you Captain Cocksure). These commandments that I hand down to you will be a great guide and reference for you if you are considering having a child, are almost there with a baby on the way, or if you've been a dad for years.

FATHERHOOD COMMANDMENT #1: THOU SHALT BE INVOLVED.

Now at first sight, this might seem like a really simple commandment. Change some diapers - hopefully not too many, make some cool car engine sounds in your throat while you fly a pink or blue plastic kiddie spoon with some apple goop on it into your kid's mouth, basically just split the duties and everyone is happy, right? Well while that's the right idea, we are still in a relatively new evolving phase of time right now. In reality the idea of 50/50 parenting is less than thirty years old. Ask yourself how involved was your father? Even if he was off the charts on top of his game, if you were born anytime before 1975 it is really likely that he changed less than ten percent of the diapers and handled less than twenty percent of the child rearing. My Dad proudly reminds all of us kids that he never changed a diaper and we turned out all right.

Here's some further philosophy on co-parenting in the twenty first century...let's paint a real scenario for you now...

So the two pronounced pink lines were clear as day on the pregnancy test. You popped open the bottle of Martinelli's and celebrated with tears of joy, and mutually agreed not to tell any family members until the end of the first trimester... Well at least the first month anyway. Once you successfully navigate your way through the first trimester, it's time to celebrate with all of your closest relatives and friends, go through the maze of new genetic tests the doctors' put you through, not to mention the gestational diabetes scare, out-do the Jones' baby room at least a good three months before the due date and cap it all off by having the baby shower soiree of all baby shower soirees. WHEW!!

At last your pride and joy is delivered, more healthy and beautiful than you could have dreamed. Congratulations. You've done it. You are parents. You have joined an elite group and suddenly being exhausted from a hard day at work just isn't an option anymore, for either of you. Maternity leave will unfortunately be short and sweet, and once Mom is back to the grind, the interesting question raised will most likely be, "We both work full time, so why is it that the bulk of parenting responsibility is still on Mom?"
The answer is that we as a society have not quite made the transition into true co-parenting yet. A mere fifty years ago, Dad brought home the bacon and Mom took care of the kids. The roles were clearly defined for each individual. But as times changed and the cost of living blew through the roof, it became impossible for most families to survive on a single family income. However, fifty years isn't that long of a history, and the majority of men are still reluctant to embrace the true responsibility of co-parenting. Perhaps it's the poor advice coming from their fathers and grandfathers, or because it's still new, men just don't know what it is they should do.

(to be continued)

Happy New Year, Guyville Sale Style!

Posted December 29, 2008 3:30 PM

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As promised, and we always keep 'em, we're blowing out our entire inventory of The Guyville Party Guy section. From Tuesday, December 30th until January 5th 2009 (doesn't that sound weird?) we will be putting this entire section on sale for 20% off! So feel free to check out our stupendous line of Personalized Mugs! Look at our fabulous Coasters, all personalized of course, with extremely cool guy themed designs. If you're compiling your list of 2009 New Years resolutions, you're probably committing to losing weight, and doing more outdoor activity to help get you fit. Well, we like that idea and support you in that crazy endeavor. But just in case you get hot and thirsty doing all of that outdoor activity, we've got you covered with our Personalized Coolers.

We think that New Years represents a party atmosphere, and we want to raise a glass and celebrate with you. Enjoy our plethora of Bar gifts and remember to drink and then cab it, or get someone else to drive. Nobody wants a lousy DUI to start off the new year, yet thousands of idiots out there will get 'em. That's why we always either have a party at our own home, or find out what the neighbors are doing. If we can't walk to the party, we usually don't go. So lift a personalized glass, toast to prosperity, world peace and happiness, and be smart and safe, and have a great, great time!

The Holidays Aren't Over Yet

Posted December 27, 2008 12:45 PM

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We're nearly through a most satisfying, gift giving holiday season with only New Years Eve and New Years Day remaining. Some of us are back at work already, and many of us are still enjoying a relaxing vacation, ever spiteful of that soon-to-be-arriving moment that is the one that represents the official end of this blissful time. The Wall Street Journal had an interesting article that had some celebrities 2009 resolutions. My favorite belonged to Frank Wilczek, 57, the Nobel Prize-winning particle physicist and author from Cambridge, Mass.

PROFESSIONAL: I'm writing a physics murder mystery. The idea is that two men and two women from Harvard and MIT collaborate and discover dark matter. It's clear that they should win a Nobel Prize, but according to the rules of the prize, only three people at most can share. PERSONAL: I'm looking forward to getting better acquainted with my Wii. I've been mucking around with Wii Sports. I like the boxing and bowling and tennis. INDUSTRY: We have the LHC [Large Hadron Collider, a subatomic particle collider in Switzerland], which will explore the frontier of high-energy physics. There's a whole well-known agenda featuring unification, supersymmetry, looking for the Higgs particle, perhaps shedding light on the question of dark matter. The most important work in the area is yet to be done.

So this guy invented possibly the most complicated and potentially innovative device in the history of mankind, yet his personal goal is to learn to be better at his Nintendo Wii. That, in a word, is awesome!

Whatever your resolutions are for the coming year, we sincerely wish you achieve them all. If you need advice as to how you can accomplish some of the more difficult ones, then feel free to drop a comment here and I'll see what I can do to help. HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Merry Christmas To All!

Posted December 24, 2008 6:25 AM

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Whether you still believe that Santa is on his way or not, it's early morning on the 24th, and not a creature is stirring, though I am hearing some pretty good snoring in the other room. As you can see from that picture of my house, it's chilly here, beautiful, but chilly. It's the kind of morning where you put on a pot of coffee and make up a nice hot batch of hot cocoa, while starting a BIG fire in the fireplace, after that is done the holiday music goes on followed by the Christmas Tree lights. No need to light gingerbread scented candles as we cooked most of last night and the lingering scents still hang heavy in the air in a really good way. It's Christmas Eve morning, and clearly my five year-old isn't the only excited one.

From the bottom of our hearts, we want to wish you a most wonderful holiday season, no matter what you celebrate. This has been a trying year for many people, and we want to sincerely thank you for making Guyville your retail center for the guys this year. There are other places to shop and visit, and you chose us and that makes us warm and fuzzy and excited to bring you new and wonderful gift choices for the coming year. Let's face it...somebody needs to be on the cutting edge of personalized gifts for men, and we didn't get that "Leader in Personalized gifts for men" moniker for nothing. We invite you to partake in our after-Holiday season sale which will be taking place very soon, so check back often to see what we have up our sleeve.

Also, not to forget, you've gotten through this holiday season unscathed, however, February 14th is coming up soon, and we got some great promos and specials coming your way. So eat, drink and be merry...tomorrow you don't have to work!

Time Left for Holiday Gift Shipping

Posted December 17, 2008 10:16 AM

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So time is tick, ticking away as the ever approaching pitter pat of reindeer feet on the rooftops draws nearer. If you are a last minute shopper and you're worried that if you buy a gift from our Gifts For Men by Guyville it might not get to your door in time, the good news is that we're offering a 20% discount on our shipping for all gifts that are express shipped from now until December 18th (Use Promo Code: GVHOL 2008). So, procrastinate away, my friend. You still have time. Granted, you might want to get on it. So, what are you still reading this for? Get your tush on over to the Store and see the plethora of fantastic guy gifts that he will love this holiday season.

You need a nudge in the right direction? Here are a few oddball choices that you might not normally think of.

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While a picture frame might not seem like the most original gift idea, our Leather and Pewter Picture Frame is rugged and masculine, and something he definitely doesn't own. We're Guyville, after all, and we're the epitome of masculinity. Case in point...






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Our Tequila Design Personalized Humidor. Take your time and do some shopping. We'll help expedite your shipping needs so you can get everything you need drop shipped right to your door before the big day. But get on it now. Go on...click away, my friend. Buy in good health and enjoy knowing that you can shop til you drop without ever leaving the couch!

Online Holiday Shopping Picks Up

Posted December 10, 2008 3:38 PM

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The LA Times reported that shopping numbers have returned after a dismal start to the online holiday shopping season. From Nov. 1 through Dec. 5, online shoppers spent $14.92 billion, which was essentially flat compared with the year-ago $14.90 billion. Given the current status of the economy, however, many are happy with any growth over 2007. Here at Guyville, we can proudly report record sales this holiday season. With products from $15 to $550 we have a plethora of anything he could possibly need or want this holiday season. Add to the fact that we offer free shipping on orders over $100 and you have to ask why anyone would rather go to the mall then shop for their guy gifts from the comfort of their own home.


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If he's a golf lover, then visit our personalized Golfing Gifts for some new ideas for links essentials to add to his (second) greatest love. From Personalized Putters to Accessory Bags for the game or for his life needs in general. With a combination of incredible value and well crafted gifts for men, we hope to cater to the needs of our customers for many years in the future with exciting things that he really wants. Remember Guyville for not just the holidays, but also for his Birthday, Valentines Day and Fathers Day.

For more great guy gift ideas, peruse our virtual aisles at the Gifts For Men by Guyville and you'll see why we are truly the leaders in personalized gifts for men.

Why He Loves Personalized Gifts for Guys

Posted December 4, 2008 7:55 AM

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Everyone who visits Guyville always tells us, "Personalized gifts for men, what a brilliant idea." Clearly it's not a new idea as I still have the personalized "Steven A" wallet that my Grandfather "Pop" used everyday, and he passed on 24 years ago. We have definitely seen a huge surge in demand for personalized gifts for men, and frankly, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to realize that buying a product that is personalized for about the same price as you would pay at a department store for something generic right off the shelf, is always the way to go. Other things go into the equation also, such as the quality of the product (very important!) to the way the gifts are personalized and how well that process is done (equally as important!).

Take our Personalized Genuine Money Clip and Wallet pictured above. It's a bargain, most likely less expensive than anything you'd find at any mall in the USA, and it's personalized with his initials so he'll feel a sense of pride of ownership when he carries it with him throughout his day.

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Personalization has historically been used to commemorate special events like weddings and anniversaries, but we know that it translates beautifully to everyday, special items he uses like Money Clips, Golfing Gifts, Poker Sets, Gentlemen Accessories, heck even Grilling Gifts are a hot new item for personalization!

Clearly the demand for personalized gifts for men is on the rapid rise, poor economy and all. We have heard the cry of our fellow men and his need for personalization and we've answered our call of duty. If you need ideas of what to get him that he'll really love this holiday season, then take a few moments and visit our Gifts For Men by Guyville, where you'll get tons of ideas from our plethora of high quality, and of course, always personalized guy gifts.

Holiday gifts for men Equals Personalized Poker!

Posted December 2, 2008 10:33 PM


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As the holidays continue to approach at blazing fast speed, we understand your need to get your shopping done on time and under budget. We also know that you are not looking forward to spending a ton of time at the mall this year, or let's be honest, any year. We feel your pain and we have some quick and easy shopping solutions for the men in your household this year. Irish Whiskey...er, we mean, Irish Whiskey Personalized Poker Sets. If he's a fan of Texas Hold 'Em or any other type of poker playing, then our Personalized Poker Sets will amaze him. From the great quality, and heavy duty clay chips to the fantastic, personalized and colorful graphics that decorate the sturdy box it comes in, these Poker Sets are second to none in quality.

Our sets will give him and his boys everything they'll need to have hours of fun trying to blitz each other for all they've got, including 300 clay composite chips, five dice, two decks of cards and a dealers chip. If you want to get him a special gift that will in all likelihood be his favorite of the season, then give the gift that gives back (if he wins, of course), one of our famous and fantastic Personalized Poker Sets. If you're stumped for other gifts for the non-poker playing guys in your family then take a cruise around our Gifts For Men by Guyville and you'll understand why we are truly the leaders in personalized gifts for guys!

Guyville Celebrates Cyber Monday

Posted November 30, 2008 1:55 PM

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So you're probably wondering what celebrating Cyber Monday means for you. We have an answer for you, and you're going to love it. We're putting our entire category of Posh Wallets, personalized, of course, on sale for 20% off! If you aren't aware of exactly what Cyber Monday means, it's basically the equivalent black Friday, except it's online, and we know that means, everyone is back at work, where they should be doing that nasty 'w' word thing, you know the one that starts with a "wo-" sound and ends with an "urking." And if you think about it, it makes perfect sense, right? We're stuck for 8 to 10 hours working for the man. We'd all like to be out doing other things, but since we're strapped to our desk, and our computer, hmmm, let's check out Guyville real quick. One things leads to another, and before you know it, and without any hassle, your Holiday shopping is done.
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We will follow up our awesome Wallet sale with another spectacular 20% off sale of our entire section of Pocket Knives and Utility Tools. That sale will run from December 8th until December 14th. We cordially invite you to peruse our virtual aisles at the Gifts For Men by Guyville so you can personally see and appreciate why we are the leaders in personalized gifts for men.

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Posted November 26, 2008 1:36 PM

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Tomorrow we feast on turkey throughout the nation. My heart goes out to the birds, and I'll give thanks to them too as I attack the dark meat with great vigor. We here at Guyville wish you a wonderful and safe holiday weekend. We need to really celebrate our great country tomorrow, especially as we watch the horror of what is currently unfolding in Mumbai, India right this very moment.

You might have seen this great video last year, but we love it, so we are putting it up on Guyville for your holiday enjoyment! As Thanksgiving rolls around every year, we are stunned at how quickly each year rolls by. Didn't we just open holiday presents last month? It felt that way anyway. Yet, if you look at what has happened this year, then it feels as if it's gone on forever. Here's an example. We hit record highs for the DOW earlier this year...now, record lows. That never happens in a one year period. Also noteworthy, it felt like we actually saw McCain versus Obama for a good four years, though it was only several months. So everything is perspective, I guess.

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Anyway, remember, if you drink...drink responsibly. And do it from one of our super cool mugs for crying out loud! Have a great one, and we'll see you all soon...virtually of course!

Most Unusual gifts for men

Posted November 24, 2008 10:35 AM

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As holiday season charges towards us like a 1988 Mike Tyson uppercut, we want to make sure all of you are ready. Our Classic Welded Steak Brand, complete with Branded Box rightly deserves mention on our Most Unusual gifts for men list this year. It also is rapidly becoming one our more popular items. If he's a tough to buy for guy, he will love this gift. Henceforth, his awesome one-of-a-kind steak creations will have his stamp on them. He definitely doesn't have this gift, of that you can be sure, and it's a bargain to boot.


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With our current economic woes, we felt compelled to share a great and most unusual gifts for men choice with our Rawlings Business Card Casefor all of the business minded, baseball loving men you know. This unique case is priced well and as is our trademark, is personalized as are all of our gifts. The Rawlings Card Case, looks, feels and smells like his little league baseball glove.



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Talk about unique and unusual guy gifts this holiday season, the NFL Get in the Game Sign has become wildly popular this NFL season. As we rapidly approach the next Superbowl, honor his passion for the game by putting his name right on the back of his favorite team's jersey. If he's a rabid fan who loves his team, this will be an unforgettable gift for him. The quality of this gift is fantastic and so is the value.

We hope these unusual gift suggestions will set you on the right path during this holiday season. For more gifts for men ideas, feel free to peruse the virtual aisles of our Gifts For Men by Guyville and you'll understand why we are truly the leaders in personalized gifts for men.


Big 3 Bailout Solutions

Posted November 21, 2008 9:08 AM

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I just sent the solution to our domestic automaker problems straight to Obama myself. All of this talk about our Government swooping in to save the day with a cool $25 billion going straight to these failing automakers is nonsense. It is, however, problematic because if all three fail it doesn't only bring down those companies, and their employees which is scores of thousands of people, but it's their suppliers as well. Those who manufacture parts, plastic, seats, after market parts, and so forth. Now you're talking about jobs going away in the hundreds of thousands and it will happen over night.

Grim thought, right? I have the solution. It is simple. So simple, in fact, that it is certain to work. I propose that on Obama's website they offer an instant rebate of $5,000 for any auto purchased at any Big 3 dealership. That's right, you want a shiny new Mustang GT? After you negotiate your price, get whatever dealer kickback and manufacturer rebate, you slap down your Government rebate coupon of $5,000. Now, let's put this idea to practical use. You might be in the market for either a Nissan Altima nicely equipped or a Chevy Malibu similarly equipped. Both are in the $22,000 dollar range. Now, if you were able to negotiate the $22,000 down to $20,000 then you slap down your additional $5,000 off rebate coupon, suddenly you have a loaded Malibu for $15k! You think that won't spur auto sales right now? Having credit trouble and can't qualify for a $15k loan? This will also solve that problem. You can currently purchase an entry level Chevy Aveo, which are in the classified ads currently for about $9950. You put down your fancy $5,000 rebate coupon and suddenly you now own a brand new car for $4950! How many of those gas sippers do you think you'd see on the road once this goes through? The last time I saw a new car under $5,000 it had a Yugo badge on it in 1987.

So, let's put the numbers to a quick equation, shall we? Let's say we sell 1 million cars in the next 12 months with this plan. 1 million cars plus $5,000 rebate per car equals a total of $5 billion dollars. So, this is a win win situation. We come in at 20 billion dollars under the 25 billion dollar request and we've suddenly moved a million cars which will certainly stimulate our economy. Unless someone can tell me why this won't work, I'm going to continue preaching it as the solution.

Great Gift Ideas for Men

Posted November 19, 2008 9:07 AM

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My father-in-law used to stick his big, fat wallet in his boot. I used to laugh at him. I laughed so hard thinking that his reasoning, saving his back, was so lame. Who gets a bad back from sitting on their wallet? I laughed all the way to the chiropractor. Turns out the old fart was right. Big, overstuffed wallets sitting in one of your back pockets all day puts you out of alignment in a big way. This awesome Personalized Watch Money Clip is great looking and really effective in saving his back. If you are looking for great gift ideas for men this holiday season, this should be strongly considered.

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As we approach the NFL playoffs, we can think of no better way to honor his love of the pig skin then this really cool, get in the game Personalized NFL Pub Sign. No matter which team he screams his head off for, we have it, and we'll personalize it with his name front and center as owner of the establishment. We can't think of a better way to let him know that you feel every thrill of victory and agony of defeat right there with him!




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Philly just won the World Series. Honor his passion for American Pie with our awesome, Personalized Louisville Slugger® Walker Finish Baseball Bat. When we suggest great gift ideas for men, we always try to put ourselves in the place of the person unwrapping the gift. We know how we felt when we first unwrapped our Sluggers. We know he'll love this gift. Take it from the guys who know what guys really want...this is a can't miss gift item. Unless he hates baseball. (Blasphemy). If that's the case then refer to the first two gift ideas for guys in this blog.

For other great holiday gift ideas for men, peruse the virtual aisles of Guyville and you will understand why we are the leaders in personalized gifts for men.

Luxury gifts for men

Posted November 16, 2008 10:09 AM

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It's that time of year again. Whether you are ready or not, December is a stone's throw away from today, and it's coming fast and furious. Why wrestle with the stinky guy in front of you in a line that goes on forever? Shop the virtual aisles of Guyville and get your man some great gifts this season. Let's start with the luxury gifts for men choice, this awesome Men's Accessory Case. It's beautifully constructed, will help keep him organized, and, of course, it's personalized for that added touch and for a price that won't break the bank. Yeah, we've got you covered.

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Yes our 24k Collar Stayclips are dipped in 24 karat gold. Not 14 karat...not 18 karat, but the best 24 karat gold money can buy. All of that and they aren't even a hundred bucks. Not bad, eh? These are truly a luxury gift that he doesn't have, but will absolutely love, especially if he's no stranger to a fine suit.






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All right boss, I know you're thinking to yourself that this awesome Custom Heatbacker Steak Brand is not a luxury gifts for men item. You are probably right about that. I did sneak it into the mix, but only because this is such a clever and original guy gift idea!! And on top of that, most people in the world consider eating a steak like the one pictured a luxury! Granted they don't live in this country where you can find steaks on every street corner, but you know what I mean. Steak + Steak Brand + friends and family = priceless night of fun.

I hope you find these off beat suggestions helpful in your search for the perfect gifts for him this holiday season. Enjoy Guyville as much as it enjoys you!

Carroll Shelby Gives Back

Posted November 15, 2008 7:28 AM

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Back in 1991, when Carroll Shelby lie on his hospital bed awaiting his heart transplant he vowed to give back to children in need of heart and kidney transplants when he was well enough. Staying true to his word, he created the Carroll Shelby Children's Foundation. He is now auctioning off his one-of-a-kind 1968 Shelby EXP500 CSS "BLACK HORNET" in an event to be hosted by EBAY on December 2nd. Bids can be submitted on ebay.com on that day. All of the proceeds for this fantastic vehicle will be donated to his charity. Get your bid in as the auctioning will be over on December 12th. The global economy may be down, but classic cars like this are an investment that go up over time. How many times can you drive and enjoy your investments? How does that Microsoft stock look gleaming in your garage? What does it feel like to scream to 100 mph on PCH in your Fannie Mae or Freddy Macs? You get my point, right? Classic cars are hard to come by, and this vehicle has absolutely no peer. There are rare cars and there are some cars that are one-of-a-kind...meaning there is only one. This is one of those instances. Break the piggy bank and drive your future million dollar car. Besides...don't we all want to help the children?

Good luck! "Psst...Honey!! Can I get a loan?" If you would like to see what awesome guy gifts will look good adorning your sleek new ride, peruse the virtual aisles of our Gifts For Men by Guyville, where we have absolutely every unique gift idea for him you can imagine!

Personalized Unique gifts for men

Posted November 8, 2008 9:03 AM

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'Tis the season to be frustrated, fa la la la...Shopping can be hard. Do you want to know why online shopping is on the rise (current economic woes not withstanding)? It's because there is something inherently wonderful about getting great gifts for your friends and family online and delivered to your doorstep without you ever having to drive to the mall, fight for a parking spot, wait in lines, etc. Heck you can stay in your robe and knock it all out in about an hour without having to get up off the couch! Add to that the opportunity to have all of your holiday gifts for your guys personalized, and you are in business.

We have some unique gifts for men suggestions that might be a little off the beaten path, but we think you'll appreciate them. The Personalized Domino Set is a gift that brings the once popular game back in a big way. The stainless steel pieces and game set is gorgeous too.

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In the spirit of throwback, we love this Personalized Mach3 Razor and Stand. This is how his grandpappy used to do it, and let's face it, all of the fancy electric razors never get the cheeks as smooth as the oldsters. This beautiful gift idea will also be a welcome and handsome addition to fancify any and all bathrooms.



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Honorable mention in our Unique guy gifts blog is the Personalized Charging Station. Listen, not many guys have this item in their bedroom, or office but absolutely EVERY guy should have this item! If he's forever searching for lost keys, lost wallet, lost phone, lost mind, this gift will blow him away. He'll never be late for work again...at least not due to lost stuff. It won't keep him from running out of gas, however, but we can't help him with that.

We hope this list of unique gifts for men helps! For a few hundred more great gift ideas, visit our Gifts For Men by Guyville, where you'll find everything you need for this holiday shopping season!

Guyville in US Weekly

Posted October 22, 2008 1:41 PM

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Guyville's gifts for men has officially hit the big time. Fine, we're exaggerating, but we find our cool print ad in US, one of the most widely read publications, pretty exciting. Whether we sell a thousand of these handsome, personalized glassware units next week or fifty thousand, we'll be ready as we always are. So keep an eye on next week's US Weekly - 11/3/08 issue on sale 10/24/08. We're also putting twenty selected items on sale in our Gifts For Men by Guyville to really kick off holiday gift giving. I know it doesn't seem like it, but it is holiday shopping time. In light of the current economic woes, we think you'll love not only our 20% off sale items, but our pricing structure in general.

Here is a bit about our "Great Gastbyesque" Personalized Drinking Glasses. They are unique. They are well constructed, with a hefty and durable base. They, like all of our guy gifts, are personalized. If you can't personalized it, we don't carry it. That rule may get broken someday, but for now you can be sure that all of our hundreds of gift items can be uniquely personalized with his name. No where else will you find such a selection at more aggressive prices. Okay...enough tooting of our own horns. You go shop now, and then you can toot our horn for us. Deal? Can I get a 'honk honk?"

Joe The gifts for men Giver

Posted October 20, 2008 9:43 AM

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Haven't we heard enough of Joe the Plumber the past two weeks? Yeah, yeah, we're fighting for you, Joe. We're going to lower your taxes, Joe. We're going to furnish your home and pay off your credit card debt, Joe. Hey Joe, we're going to clothe your kids and buy you a Mercedes Benz too. Bla bla bla...whatever will buy your vote, Joe. My good friend put it best when he said, "One of them quite possibly represents more of the last eight years, and the other will inspire me as he rapes me with taxes." Thank goodness all we really know over here is guy gifts. Personalized gifts for men, well, that we can do and do well, regardless of who emerges victorious in the upcoming election.

We'd like to actually do something useful for you, Joe the every-man-plumber-father-taxpayer-regular guy. We'd like to do what we do best and that is show you some of our favorite, Joe Regular Guy Gifts.

Joe Gift #1: The Personalized Lockback Knife: This is an extremely popular gift for it's usefulness, sleek design, and of course, it's personalized.

Joe Gift #2: Democrat or Republican steak brands. Now you can make your statement and enjoy spirited debates over finely cooked steaks. What can be better than that?

Joe Gift #3: Personalized House of Cards Poker Set: When things are the toughest for folks financially, playing a casual game of poker with the guys takes on an entirely new meaning, especially when the stakes are for baby's new pair of shoes...literally!

Why we can't predict who is going to win in this most tumultuous and bizarre election year, we can at least offer up the latest, greatest, and most useful Regular Joe gifts at our Regular Joe Gifts For Men by Guyville.

Flask Weather Finally!

Posted October 13, 2008 8:32 AM

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It's October, folks. As promised, we have our guy gifts recommendations for the fast approaching holidays. We'll make more as the clock trudges forward, but for this blog, we want to talk about what warms the cockles of our heart, FLASKS! Flasks soared in popularity in the 18th century, but originated in the middle ages as people used gutted fruit to store their liquor. Desperate times create amazing ingenuity, right? A coconut would work in a pinch. Makes sense to me. The hip flask was noted for its compactness which was exceedingly useful during prohibition. It fit nicely inside a trouser pocket or a lady's garter belt.

Now that the history lesson is over we invite you to take a look at our top three flasks here at Guyville.

1. The Personalized Croco Leather Flask: This awesomely styled flask not only looks unique, but it also holds 5 ounces of his favorite libation, making this a perfect gifts for men choice.

2. The Green Camouflage Flask: In the 18th century girls would sneak gin to their men on British war ships in their petticoats. This Camouflage flask brings about those memories once again.

3. When the aliens finally land on earth, he'll be able to share his Scotch with them by busting out this futuristic, modern triangular flask. This flask is cool, and most importantly, it holds 6 ounces of his favorite fluid and that's a good thing too, because those aliens can really hold their liquor!

So there you have it. Our top three choices for cool guy gifts in the cool Autumn air drinking season. For more great gifts for men choices, check out our Gifts For Men by Guyville.

The Last Great Bachelor is Gone

Posted October 10, 2008 11:12 AM


Let's face it...I don't care what Howard Stern looks like, he can bang whatever 15 on a scale of 1 to 10 that he wants. This has been true for years. He knows it, you know it, and the 15's out there that pine for him know it. That being the case, what is it about Beth Ostrosky that has been able to captivate him and take him away from single-guy-who-can-bang-whoever-he-wants-bliss? None of us really know what happens behind his closed doors and truly it doesn't really matter. Beth might dress him up in Barbie dresses tailor made for six foot five dudes for all we know and it's irrelevant because his on screen/radio persona is all guy all the time, and we at Guyville can get behind that the same way we can get behind most of the women that strip on his show.

Here's the situation, Howard, we need you to do nothing other than stay your course. It's the same course that you've kept your entire career, and in this pinnacle moment in this nation's history, we need nothing that you do to change even a half of an iota. We wish you all the best in your wedded bliss. We hope this lasts forever, bla bla bla. We simply need you to continue being you. We might even need you to kick it up a notch or two in the debauchery department just so we know you haven't lost your touch. Believe me...the economy is crumbling. I can buy Ford stock for the same price as a doughnut. I can name my own price for a lap dance at my local titty joint, but the one thing that absolutely must not change for me/us/guys is one ounce of edge to your show. In fact, I'm going to need someone to shit in a bag, light it on fire and throw it at Ba ba booey next week.

We guys don't want to believe you've been defeated, or settled. Believe me, you are our rock of Gibraltar. You can Tivo "Dancing with the Stars" and Hoff's "America's Got Talent" all you want, you're still the (figurative) John Holmes perpetually for us - (clearly the alive/pre-AIDS John Holmes, but you knew that). We also saw some of our other All Guy All the Time fallen heroes at your wedding. We saw Billy Joel there. We saw Rob Zombie there, and can we bag for a second on that wuss whipped Jerry O'Connell who was forbidden to come to your wedding by his wife, Rebecca? Is he allowed to fire up his Playstation for five minutes while she's on the can, or does the "no playing video games while I'm awake" rule that out too? What a puss. I'm going to tell myself that not only would Beth let you play video games whenever you want, but she'd let you do it while you're on the crapper, after you've just had sex (without cuddling afterward) and she'd be serving you a beer and Pringles while you're at it. Yup. That's why you did it. Beth is off the charts.

Thanks for listening, Howard. You're the best, and Lord knows we need you now more than ever, buddy. Way to keep it real.

-Your Friends here at Guyville

Runnin With the Devil - Sans Music

Posted October 2, 2008 1:29 PM


We're taking a break from guy gifts for the moment to share with you a most hilarious video. This recording of David Lee Roth singing Runnin' With the Devil without music had us on the floor and we wanted to share it with you. Hats off to GiggleSugar.com for posting this in their blog and commenting on it. I love how some of his screams are full hearted and some are half-hearted. It all sounds great in the song with the music fully mixed, but here, listening to it completely isolated I hear myself saying, "Damn...I could have been a rock star. I should have hit the gym more and practiced those Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks and I could be soakin' in a jacuzzi with my soul mate right now." Of course, no disrespect intended for the great DLR. It's just...well, without the music, more than a little of the magic disappears. "I'm only gonna tell ya one tyyyyymmmme....ahhh, yeah!"

So, go my friends, go and run with the devil for a hair over three minutes. We hope you enjoy as much as we did. We'll get back to the gifts for men blogs soon. We promise.

Fall Must Have Guy Gifts

Posted September 27, 2008 2:56 PM

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Fall is upon us now, even though it's 97 degrees outside of my house at this very moment. Assuming that's all going away within the next few days, however, we guys have to be ready for what fall brings, so I bring to you a gifts for men list of five fall essentials. Here they are in no particular order:

1. Our very own personalized Duffle Bag. This bag is tailor made for the gym, and it's personalized so we'll always know it belongs to Freddy Anderson Thompson, or F.A.T. for short. The facts are the eating holidays are coming, and F.A.T. needs to hit the gym now, not wait until January 1st and have to work off yet another fifteen extra l.b.'s.

2. The Personalized Charging Station. Men are usually, er, how can I put this delicately? Pigs. Yup, there it is. We're little piggies, and we need a blanket. The charging station ingeniously keeps all of our accessory essentials in one place. An absolute must have gift idea for him.

3. The Personalized Louisville Slugger Bat. You've heard of Mr. October? Well the playoffs are upon us, my friends. He needs to have and hold this item in his hands as he watches every 99 mph fastball whiz past Manny Ramirez.

4. The Personalized House of Cards Poker Set. When the weather turns cold, and the guys can't play slow pitch softball outside, they'll need to turn their manly attention elsewhere and we've got the perfect answer for him. He will love fleecing, er, playing with his best buddies as they Texas hold one another until the wee hours.

5. The Utility Knife with Flashlight. What a fantastic must have guy gift idea. Somebody has a big brain, and we like big brains. In a world of hurricanes, earthquakes and uncertainty, it's nice to have a tool with a light on it, and we can't think of a more useful gadget to have around the house.

So there you have it. 5 must have gifts for all the guys this fall season. We'll have another list right around the corner when winter and the holidays kick fall off the calendar. Until then...enjoy your shopping at Guyville, the leader in personalized gifts for men.


Daytime Commercials

Posted September 24, 2008 1:27 PM

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There is a fine line between blogging for dollars and just plain old sitting at home like an F.L.B. (Fat Lazy Bastard) watching too much television. This is why I absolutely don't watch daytime television why I'm "working" anymore. It's just not right, and I'll tell you why. When you're "working" while the television is on and you lift your head up every now and again to tune into Judge Judy or The People's Court or that awesome, straight shooter, Judge Mathis (I love that guy! He came from the streets, you know) it not only distracts from what you should be doing ("working") but it also depresses you. I've come to realize it isn't the programming that's depressing, it's the dang commercials. In one 2 minute commercial break I actually saw an ad for the breathing Nebulizer, a spectacular colon cleaner, a super-dee-duper fast wheel chair and it was topped off by some Larry H. Parker rip off guy telling me he can get me millions if I was injured at work. Man I wanted to crawl in a hole after watching these things. I don't know what a damn nebulizer is, but I sure as heck know I don't ever want to.

I just needed to vent. And now...a little guy gifts treat at the ole Gifts For Men by Guyville. You know, I haven't mentioned it in a while, but just so you don't forget...we really are the leaders in personalized gifts for men.

What Men Really Need

Posted September 23, 2008 9:52 AM

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Forget what you think you know about what men really need. Sure we like our bellies full and our...well you know the rest. You already understand that we don't just want, but truly need a big screen plasma, LCD, or DLP big screen (note: minimum 42" in size). You know that cars and bikes (no not, bike-cycles, real motorcycles) are not just a right, they're a right of passage for guys. You probably also know that films like Reno 911! Miami, Borat, Stripes and Caddyshack are absolute must see/must own films.

But if gifts for men are on the agenda, then what men really need is a little bit of organization in their busy lives. Let's face facts, there is a ton of sports on TV pretty much 24/7, add to that waxing his car, bowling league, slow pitch soft ball, late night showings of Hellboy II and eating desert, and you realize that the small things in life, like organization of his watch, keys, coins, etc are almost an after thought. Guys aren't pigs by choice, it's simply that there are only so many hours in a day. Adding daily organization on top of other important tasks such as lifting our significant asses off the couch nearly seems impossible! In order to help with this, we highly suggest our Men's Black Accessory Case. This will greatly help with organization as all he'll have to do is lift items from his pocket into the handsome box, and in the morning, lift items from handsome box and lower them into pockets. For gifts for guys, it's a real no-brainer, like a 12" meatball sub versus a 6" Veggie Delight. For other fantastic personalized guy gifts ideas, give our Gifts For Men by Guyville a test drive. You won't regret it!

Chevy Volt - Less Than 2 Cents Per Mile!

Posted September 16, 2008 3:21 PM

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Jalopnik was all over the GM's centennial celebration and the unveiling of the New Chevy Volt due out sometime in 2010 (they/we hope). I also learned that the Volt will have a top speed of 100 mph, which, let's face it, will really suck when you're traveling through Montana and the big rigs are blowing past you at 120 mph making you look foolish. I once had a GMC Jimmy that was brand new and electronically limited at 90 mph. I called the dealer screaming obscenities as semi after semi blew past me like I was standing still. Things are different now, however, and nobody should need to travel faster than a Randy Johnson (in his prime) fastball. The Volt will also be able to run off its electric motor for the first 40 miles, which means you could conceivably go months without ever having to get gas if you're simply commuting to work each day.

GM says:
The car will cost "less than purchasing a cup of your favorite coffee" to recharge, and use less electricity annually than a refrigerator. The Volt should cost less than 2 cents per mile to drive on electricity, GM said, compared to 12 cents a mile on gasoline at a price of $3.60 a gallon.

We've been all over the car news lately, and though we specialize in gifts for men, we can't help but be drawn to any new news that incorporates four wheels and a motor. We are guys after all.

Ultimate Guy Grooming

Posted September 13, 2008 8:52 AM

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This is an exciting day for guys. While I have heard people refer to me as metro-sexual in the past, I always took that as a compliment. Probably because I'm comfortable in my heterosexual skin - (well, that and my wife is smokin' hot) - but I met some guys on the web that have the same grooming virtues as myself as I was stumbling around online today at Iconoculture.com. The GroomingGuys have not only made male grooming a priority, they've made it a way of life. We offer advice in the gifts for men department and these forward thinking guys offer advice in the grooming for men department. You'll find advice in their grooming tips section to cover stuff like, "Pluck You" Ingrown Hairs, "The Grooming Bill of Rights" and "Five Tips to Be More of a Gentleman." I had never heard the rule that if you shave, don't touch your face for a while. It makes sense too. You've just shaved your face, so all that baby skin is vulnerable waiting for you to test the softness factor. Then, one by one, you have your six kids rub their grimy, nose picking fingers over it to check it out, meanwhile all of that newly exposed skin is at higher risk for infection/break outs/grow an alien arm or potato out of it. Again, makes perfect sense, but something I never knew. Check these guys out and embrace your inner metro self. Your babes will thank you for it.

Forget Gas This Car Runs on Air

Posted September 10, 2008 2:45 PM

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Yes, this awesome car runs on compressed air, and you could see it in the U.S. as soon as 2009! We learned from Gas 2.0 that this awesome Zero Pollution Motor's (ZPM) vehicle, is currently being produced by India's largest automaker, Tata Motors. Ease up on the boob jokes, please. Tata anticipates 6,000 of these vehicles on the streets in India by the end of the year. So how does this vehicle that produces zero emissions at less than 35 mph and half of the CO2 of a Prius over 35 mph work? Can it really go over 800 miles on a single fill up, exceed speeds of 95 mph, and refill in less than three minutes at the service station? Sounds too good to be true, but apparently isn't, and uses technology that isn't all that complicated either.

One of the things it does is uses compressed air to force the engine's pistons up and down instead of using gasoline (traditional combustion engine) which injects small amounts of fuel which produces explosions to move the pistons. It uses a small portion of gasoline in a tiny 8 gallon tank which in essence will create more compressed air (not power the engine). One of the challenges will be passing stringent US safety standards as this vehicle will use mostly aluminum parts and will weigh about half what our cars of that size weigh right now. Assuming they figure all of that out. We can't wait to see it come to market. Imagine telling your buddies. Yeah, I don't use gas anymore. Gas blows. I mean really blows. My car runs on air...or maybe it's hair...not sure the 'h' might be silent. Now imagine Ron Burgundy saying that. Everything sounds better coming out of Ron Burgundy's mouth.

Listen, we're just a guy gifts blog, but I can't think of a better gift for the holidays than a new air car. You hear that, honey? AN AIR CAR!!

Looking For A Few Good Jews

Posted September 8, 2008 2:29 PM

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Listen we're not making this up. The Associated Press has an article about small town, Dothan, Alabama where Larry Blumberg is apparently looking for nice Jewish families to move into his corner of the Bible Belt. Blumberg is part of an organization that is looking for Jewish families to move to Dothan, an overwhelmingly Christian town, and if the Jewish families stay for at least five years, they won't have to pay back the whopping $50,000 that they are offering. The issue at hand is that the older Jewish folks are dying off and the younger generations are moving away. Dozens of synagogues have closed as a result of this. I actually think this is a cool way for this group of folks to entice people to move into their hood. Blumberg's group is touting a great quality of life, a low cost of living, small town charm and it's only about 80 miles away from Florida's beaches.

Local Rabbi Lynne Goldsmith wasn't sure what to expect when she took over the congregation at Temple Emanu-El, but she found that the old South stereotypes were non-existent and it has proven a wonderful place to live, and she has been accepted with open arms. Hmmm, fifty thousand bucks? Do half Jews like me with agnostic wives count? We've got some awesome gifts for guys that we could buy with fifty grand!

Politicians and Their Cufflinks

Posted September 3, 2008 11:34 AM

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Say what you will about politicians, and mostly the adjectives that precede the nouns that describe our country's leaders historically haven't been all that flattering. For example, you may have heard many of them described with adjectives like, "gigantic" which would then be followed by nouns that rhyme with glass-hole. You get the picture. Emotions are running at an all time high with the recently completed Democratic National Convention and the current Republican National Convention. People are more passionate than ever about their political horses and may the best people, not necessarily parties, win. One thing we have noticed, is the propensity for not only perfectly starched shirts, but we've also noticed in both conventions, that nearly all of the politicians are wearing cufflinks!

Lest you think that cufflinks are strictly for wedding parties, we noticed that these folks are taking their best fashion steps forward and look like a million (after tax) bucks. We've always been a fan of the old cufflink and hope that you take notice of the personalized element that are available for our entire line of cufflinks as well as the diverse styling. Listen, we're not saying you need to run out and put your name on the ballot to run for Congress, we're just suggesting you look the part. Who knows, perhaps you can be the next "come outta nowhere" Vice Presidential nominee.

The Republican Convention Gets Underway

Posted September 2, 2008 4:56 PM

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Well, it took a while but the Republican National Convention finally begins today. Say what you will about politics, but I don't recall an election getting so much attention in my entire lifetime and that spans quite a few decades. People are excited as the drama unfolds on a daily basis. Talk around the water coolers from state to state has become fascinating and suddenly millions of people are Googling names like Sarah Palin and Levi Johnston. We won't use this blog to discuss our personal opinions on either party or either candidate. We are, after all, a gifts for men site specializing in personalized guy gifts. We still find all of this fascinating and terrific. While we can't quite put our finger on whom is getting the leg up on whom - we do believe that few people were talking about Obama's historic night when McCain chose the little known Governor of Alaska to become his Vice Prez a mere day later. So if shock value was what he was going for, I believe he achieved that goal.

So enjoy the Maverick and Barracuda show tonight. We will do the same and see what other coffee talk comes out of this crazy election end of the year. In the spirit of all this fun, we bring to you the Republican and Democrat Steak Brands. These gifts will elicit smiles, needling and fun conversation. When you are done peeking at the brands, go visit the rest of our Gifts For Men by Guyville. You'll understand we are the leaders in personalized gifts for men.

It's Back To School Time

Posted August 31, 2008 6:18 AM

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If you could turn back time, you'd likely want to turn it back three full months and start summer all over again, but just think of all you'd miss. You wouldn't see who would win the world series. You'd miss what's sure to be an awesome NFL and College football season. Possibly more important that all of that, you'd miss the fall lineup on NBC. So, in order to help you grin and bear the cooling temperatures, and less provocative clothing that is forthcoming, we put a bunch of really awesome gifts for men on sale in our Guyville Store. We figure that will at least soften the blow a little, and let's face it, you're going to need some new personalized guy gifts that are going to be essential at college, high school, or your new job.

If he's going away to school, he'll need our personalized Sports Duffle Bag, that will hold a ton of his important items. He'll also need a personalzied iPod Holder. Let's face it, pretty much everyone - both kids and adults have an iPod, so let's at the very least personalize his so no one dares try to take it and claim it as their own. Also on sale this week is our Personalized Silver USB Flash Key Chain, our Leather Wrapped Personalized Alarm Clock for those guys like me who can never get out of bed, and we have a lot more in our Sale Section.

The truth is, we hate the end of Summer too. But we know there is going to be some cool stuff to watch on TV, and we're going to rush the coolest fraternities...and if coach puts me in the big game, we're gonna win state...no doubt in my mind. Yep, I'll go pro making millions of dollars soaking it up in a hot tub with my soul mate. You shop our 20 percent off back-to-school sale from 8/29 until 9/7...I gotta practice throwing this here football over them mountains over there.

Texas Schools Consider Drinking Age

Posted August 26, 2008 2:15 PM

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M.A.D.D. thinks it is ridiculous and there are both pro and con arguments on whether or not Texas should drop the drinking age from 21 to 18 years of age. An article in Chron.com is fascinating to us because we can't quite understand the logic of the pro side to dropping the drinking age to 18, since the issue at hand is that there is a big problem with underage binge drinking at the big universities. What the heck? What am I missing here? There are too many kids drinking and doing stupid things, so what we should do is drop the legal age to 18 so more kids can get drunk, only this time it's legal. According to this article UT in Austin says maybe. Texas A&M says not now. And a West Texas school says sign it up.

The argument they're trying to make is that if we lower the age it will somehow de-glorify drinking, and kids will do less of it if they could do more of it around adults. Did someone just rent the movie "Idiocracy" and decide that's the direction we should go? This argument not only doesn't make any sense, it's humorous. Here's another quote from the article: "In Texas, the president of the University of the Incarnate Word, in San Antonio, has signed the initiative. So did Pat O'Brien, president of West Texas A&M in Canyon.
"I am not encouraging teenagers to drink; that is not why I signed it," O'Brien said. "We have a drinking problem in the nation on college campuses. The current law does not resolve it."

Uh...okay, so the current law doesn't resolve it therefore, let's try something, anything, different. How drunk were these guys when they signed this thing? Listen, I'm not saying I didn't do a little underage drinking myself, and boy did I curse having to wait to be 21 to go to a bar when all my older friends were going every weekend. But I also drive quite a bit. I knew that the decisions I made in life were far different at 21 then they were at 18! I'd rather not be sharing the road with teenagers who have been LEGALLY drinking and trying to decide whether or not they're cool to drive home!

Look kids, we here at Guyville aren't haters. Far from it. When you hit the magic 2 to the 1, we'll be here ready to celebrate that first shot of gut rot Wild Turkey 101 out of one of our many cool shot glasses. We'll toast to many future years of you shopping in our gifts for men store, and most importantly we'll toast to your long life.

Drunk in the U.K.

Posted July 24, 2008 7:34 AM

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U.K. - The Financial Times reported that the drinks industry has apparently called on the government to investigate Britain's binge drinking culture - apparently they are unsure as to what might be the cause of it. There is new research that links cheaper alcohol to rising consumption. Also of note is that since 1970, alcohol is much more affordable than it used to be, and perhaps that is the reason more Brits are taking to the sauce.

C'mon, now. Have any of these guys reporting ever actually been outside of the U.K.? People drink to get drunk because it's freezing all the time! When it pours every day that ends in "y" then you better bet people are going to go to the local pub after work every single day, meet their friends, get sloshed, and stagger home. It's the only way to make that crappy weather palatable.

We embrace our perpetually cold English brethren and support you in your everlasting pursuit of drink. We do this by sending you straight to the flask section of our Gifts For Men by Guyville, so you can not only party, but you can do it in style by finding your favorite personalized gifts for men, and wear it in your inside pocket proudly!

Playing Busy At Work

Posted July 22, 2008 10:05 AM

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That's right we said it, we know what you're up to at work. You've got a plethora of Post-its surrounding your desk with a thousand to-do's. If your boss ever cared to look closely at them, he'd see that they are filled mostly with jibberish and scribbles. You might be able to fool that goof ball, but you aren't fooling us. We like College Humor's article about Slacking off at Work, and man, we can relate.

Well, we want you to be able to sell your charade. Heaven knows you've paid enough dues for that crummy paycheck, you deserve some time to yourself. So, here's a couple of added tips:


1. Whenever you see your boss, pick up the phone and repeat after me: (breathe heavy, as if you're giving it all you've got, Captain) "I want those reports on my desk right away. If you don't do your job, then how can you expect me to do mine?!" Your boss will be so happy that his minions are hard at work.


2. Angle your computer screen down, so only you can see that you've got College Humor and The Superficial opened up on-screen.

Lastly, visit our Guyville Personalized gifts for men store. You're going to need to load up your desk with all sorts of cool office items to really pull off the "Playing Busy" charade to the highest level.

Guys Who Look Like Kenny Rogers

Posted July 9, 2008 10:32 AM

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Let us here at Guyville be the first to tell you that looking like Kenny Rogers isn't a gift from the heavens. It certainly is no accident either. You think these faux Kenny Rogers wake up in the morning with that perfectly feathered hair? You think that perfectly trimmed beard with just the right amount of salt and pepper just happens naturally? No chance. The brilliant "Men Who Look Like Kenny Rogers" website pays homage to these guys who engineer that perfect look and do it with style. We take our ten gallon cowboy hats off to all of ya'll Kenny Rogers(es) out there. You guys rock! Keep in mind, since we are a gifts for men store specializing in personalized guy gifts for even the most discriminate and hard to buy for dudes out there, we have a few shaving kits we'd like to suggest. That's only if the Missus complains of 25 years of your perfectly groomed itchy, scratchy beard of wonder.

For a plethora of other gifts for him, please visit our Guyville Store.

Happy 4th of July!

Posted July 5, 2008 11:07 AM


So what did you do on the 4th? Our Guyville family brings to you a terrific and pretty inventive pool trick that went swimmingly well on the first take. Okay...well, maybe not the first take, but we got it done before the fireworks show, so that ain't bad!

This video represents everything that we love about this holiday. It doesn't cost anything beyond some margarita mix, some wine and perhaps a little beer, and the company of great family and friends. In a world where tragedy, war and impending economic collapse loom around every corner, it's no wonder that the simple things in life are forever cherished. From our family to yours, we at Guyville hope you had a 'blast' this 4th of July. Next up...the 2008 MLB All Star Game!

If you're looking for some great gifts for men, look no further than our Personalized Gifts For Men by Guyville for all the guy gifts you'll ever need!

Picking the Right Bat For Him

Posted July 1, 2008 1:30 PM

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So, he has a big baseball collection. He's had the cards since he was eight years-old and by now they're worth five times what the house is worth, especially since real estate in its downward shift--wait, let's just call it what it is...its downward spiral. So we, of course, being a gifts for men store, want to add to his awesome collection by suggesting our line of Personalized Bats, which in honor of the 2008 All Star Game we've decided to put on sale at 20% off our normal (already awesome) price.

Since these Sluggers are for his collection, we also wanted to give you some pointers as to how to buy a baseball bat for him that will serve a purpose other than adorning his collection. There are tough questions to answer here, such as, wood or aluminum, getting a feel for the pine, etc. etc. Enjoy the sale! It ends soon! If you need other guy gifts suggestions, please visit our personalized Gifts For Men by Guyville for endless ideas.

Guyville Guy's Personalized Leather Caddy

Posted June 30, 2008 5:31 PM

We'll probably be sorry for this later, but we let our (unofficial) team mascot in the gifts for guys department go crazy! Guyville Guy, (we don't employ him, he's just a really really good customer) went crazy and put together his very own gifts for men video, this month touting our Personalized Leather Caddy. Guyville Guy is crazy, he's funny, and he sounds a tad bit like Christopher Walken...actually he sounds like a hybrid Christopher Walken with some Woody Allen sprinkled in when he gets excited.

We look forward to more of your stuff Guy. Thanks for putting this one up. Oh, yeah, and when you're done watching the video, feel free to peruse some cool, personalized gifts for men at our Gifts For Men by Guyville.

You Can Afford a Celebrity Car

Posted June 28, 2008 11:50 AM

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After reading a recent top-ten list on celebrity cars we can all afford, I decided to blog on it. Guys love cars. I'm no exception to that rule. I also found myself in some disagreement as to what they consider a "celebrity car." I personally don't find the Ford F150 full size pick up truck a high profile ride. Though I know there are umpteen ways to trick it out with rims, faring, lowering kits, etc. Still, not a show stopper in my book. They were right on the money with the Toyota Prius, however. Sure, it's a cheap car to make, but the technology is topical, and important, and hell, Larry David made the car a co-star on his TV series, so the cool factor runs high with the hybrid that gets nearly 50 miles per gallon.

One of the cars that I know is a possible "celebrity ride" drives me nuts, and that's the Chrysler 300 Series. It's like the engineers at Chrysler said, "Hey, let's make a car that sort of looks like a cheap-o version of a Bentley and we'll confuse everyone! Plus we'll make it for under $42k fully loaded! We're brilliant!" Well, you don't fool me. I smell that jalopy coming from a 1/4 mile away. Try taking that hunk out on the slalom and see how it does. Can you tell, I'm not a big fan?

Well, as a gifts for men site, you guessed it, we also have a recommendation for ya in our personalized guy gifts store to go with your celebrity ride. We love this Personalized Supple Leather CD Case to keep his CD's scratch free and awesome...like his car. For more great gifts for men ideas, please visit our Gifts For Men by Guyville.

George Carlin Has a New Venue

Posted June 23, 2008 12:08 PM

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The big Daddy of comedy has a new venue - he's making 'em laugh in heaven. He'll be joining George Burns and Sam Kinison for a 9pm set at the Comedy Store in the sky later on tonight. We'll all be morose in the coming months and years, but we'll be thankful for the 14 HBO specials, the 23 comedy albums, 3 books, the TV shows and, of course, we'll be nostalgic whenever we catch "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure" on DVD.

Carlin broke all the rules with the 7 dirty words, even going to jail for a bit before being exonerated by a judge who smartly remembered why the first amendment is the first amendment. We'll miss you, George. Hell we already do and you just did a gig last weekend in Vegas. It all seems unfair and surreal to think that we'll never hear any new stuff coming from your gravely and perfect voice. All we can say is, "be excellent to each other and...party on dude!" Meanwhile we'll do what we always do here at Guyville and drown our sorrows in some retail therapy.

Why Guys Love Leather

Posted June 18, 2008 3:43 PM

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I could try to give you some interesting psychological reason why guys love leather and why rawhide makes great gifts for men, but why bore you with facts? The truth is there is something about a good fitting leather jacket that makes us happy. The plush leather seats of a new car that puts us on that proverbial cloud nine, which by the way, is why men generally keep their cars clean - we're trying to preserve that smell indefinitely if we can. So we've decided against getting into the specifics of the whys and focus on the even more interesting, what to do about its.

Well, being that we're a gifts for guys store, we're going to simply tell you which personalized leather guy gifts to get him. How about that? The Personalized Leather Ipod Nano Holder is a guy gift favorite, and we can understand why. It's well designed, great looking...and well, leather!

Staying in the music family, and a perfect gift for the guy that's old school, we really like the Personalized Leather CD holder. Away with those nasty, black plastic and nylon holders. Just because he's fighting the iTunes and digital music revolution doesn't mean he has to look bad doing it.

Lastly, we really like the Personalized Leather 5 Watch Box. It seems silly to spend so much money on a watch and just toss it all over the dresser like it's loose change. We know buying gifts for him is difficult, and we're here to help. If you want some other great and original ideas, please visit our brand new, Gifts For Men by Guyville.

Lakers vs Celts - Game 6 Tonight

Posted June 17, 2008 10:38 AM

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We need to do some things before tonight's epic battle between the Lakers and Celtics game 6. First of all, we need to take a big deep breath. Let's face it, nobody wants this to end tonight...well, except maybe the fans in Boston. Even they might secretly be rooting for game seven battle royale. This has brought back so many great memories of past match-ups, that we want to make sure we are amply prepared. Ladies, if he isn't armed with these important armchair quarterback guy gifts, then something is wrong, and don't worry, we most certainly can rectify the problem for you. First of all, he'll need his Gold Rimmed Sports Mug...and make it personalized. It'll serve as a proper container for either his beer...or his hot toddy.

Next, he's going to need his Rawlings Mini Baseball Bat, because when his team chokes in the fourth quarter he's going to need something to break over his knee, and the big bats really smart when he does that.

Finally, we'll need to supply another on the gifts for men list that he'll need, and that is the personalized Irish Pub Sign. Let's face it...there's no way in heck these Lakers pull off winning two in a row in the Garden, whoops...my bad, history got the best of me there...I meant to say in the Bank North Garden. For more great gifts for him ideas, please visit our Guyville personalized guy gifts store.

Golf Gifts For Dad

Posted June 10, 2008 11:20 AM

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Father's Day is right around the corner now, but it's not too late to grab some fantastic, personalized gifts for him. As much as we love lists, we're going to share our top three favorite golfing gifts for Dad to make your one stop shopping for guy gifts easier this time around.

Golfing gift number 1: The Personalized Mallet Putter. Not only is this putter incredibly beautiful when it's displayed, but it will be a conversation piece for those who enjoy it every time they see it.

Golfing gift number 2: Personalized Golf Balls. Not only is this great fun for him when he tees off, but he'll love showing his opponents that they've just accepted an 18 hole bet against, "The Masher" or "Mr. Longshot" or, well, you get the point.

Lastly on this list, we would like to recommend the Personalized Golf Ball Coasters. This is a win win for both the golfer and his missus. Perhaps now, with these fancy coasters, he'll actually use them to protect your table for a change.

For many other fantastic gifts for men, please visit our Gifts For Men by Guyville. You won't be sorry.

FATHER'S DAY NEARLY UPON US

Posted June 3, 2008 4:51 AM

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Sure we're excited about our new Gifts For Men by Guyville. Why wouldn't we be? Nowhere else on the web can you find better gifts for men and we know this...we've been out there. Thus the need to build a 100 percent hacker safe store with great customer service so we can provide a shopping experience you will truly enjoy. All right, enough patting ourselves on the back. We rule...moving on. We'd like to make some suggestions for your gifts for Dad this year. Without further ado, we recommend:

Number 5 on our list: The Personalized Leather iPod Nano Holder It's sexy, sleek and personalized!

Number 4 on our list: Our Personalized Travel Cooler. Ice and beer never looked cooler.

Number 3 on the list: The Personalized Leather Watch Box. Why do we let him toss those expensive watches all over the counter, or bury them in the drawer? Those days are over.

Number 2 on the list: It is baseball season after all - protecting the table never looked as cool as these personalized, leather Home Plate Coasters

And now the moment you've all been waiting for...Number 1 on our guy gifts list for Father's Day is...

Our very own, extremely sturdy and high quality, Personalized Poker Set. Let's face it, poker hasn't just made a comeback, it's here to stay. He'll love this gift, and you'll be the big hero this year for Father's Day gifting!

St. Paddy's Day Gifts

Posted February 19, 2008 2:26 PM

It's almost here...a day that offers all citizens (including the ones with true Irish heritage) to consume as much alcohol as humanly possible without being considered a drunk. Well the true meaning of St. Patrick's Day is a day of feasting in honor of the St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland. Why March 17th, why not? Well actually, because that is the day in which St. Patrick died. I love it, a patron saint dies and we turn it into a day of boozing. Anyway since most of the feasting and boozing will take place at tens of thousands of Irish pubs we can't think of a better way to transition into these awesome Personalized Pub Signs.

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One Small Step For Man, One Frog Leap For Mankind

Posted January 10, 2008 10:38 AM

Today's Leapfrog Day! And if it wasn't before than now it is. It's everything leapfrog you'll ever want to see. You already know about the game leapfrog, jumping over your friend while they duck down and then doing the same for them and on and on until you get sick of it or mess up and fall in a tumble of limbs. What you might not know are the many other uses of leapfrog. In hockey and soccer it is a slang term used for scoring 4 goals in a single game. LeapFrog Enterprises is a company that makes educational toys for children. Pretty exciting. Some better ones though? Leapfrog is a variation of the doggy style position where she angles her body downwards or lies flat and he straddles her legs. In the words of wikipedia: "This position allows for vigorous thrusting."

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2008 CES Kicks Off Panasonic's New Works

Posted January 7, 2008 10:37 AM

The 2008 Consumer Electronics Show is under way in Vegas again and all the big R&D toys are coming to the stage. This mornings keynote unveiling, information courtesy of Engadget, kicked off with Panasonic's new 150-inch plasma TV. The monster has a resolution set at 4 x 1080p, essentially 4k by 2k. The presenter, Panasonic's AVC President Toshihiro Sakamoto, calling it the "Life Panel."

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Funny Friendships, Really Funny.

Posted January 3, 2008 10:58 AM

Friendships are an amazing thing. A friend is someone you can trust, look to for help, screw around with, and screw with in general. Usually the first three take precedence in the friendship, but every now and then you've got to screw with your friend. You guys are close enough to take a joke between each other, maybe something that you notice about them that they don't quite notice, maybe something they notice about you, or maybe you just make something up to mess with them. There are many routes to take, but as the friendship grows stronger so must the prank. Watch the progression of friendship, it begins here:

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Welcome To The New Year!

Posted January 2, 2008 10:25 AM

It's 2008 and we're all still here, guess that means you DO have to go through with those new years resolutions. Yes it sucks, but just think what a better person you'll be after the couple weeks/months that you actually stick with it! Okay fine, maybe you'll stay true through the whole year and good for you, but honestly can the majority of us say we will? Yes, we can say that, but no not honestly. Maybe that's due in part to what we're telling ourselves we're going to do to change ourselves, like "oh i'm going to eat healthier this year" or "I'm going to workout so I can look good" or maybe you thought you'd resolve to help others and the environment, go "more green." If it was the latter then you're on the right track, if not then resolve to find out more.

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A More-Than-Perfect Resolution

Posted December 27, 2007 10:27 AM

Alright guys, we know we're perfect and better than women (the only people that really judge our "faults") but if you actually do have some things to work on then this is where you'll find them. These are the ONLY situations where you should even CONSIDER making resolution for the new year. Men are too evolved to ever lack in any areas, but we can still continue to evolve and maintain our supremacy for decades to come.

Resolution #1: Directions. We're perfectly capable most of the time, but sometimes other men know more than us. Listen to them. They're still men.


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Election Selection

Posted December 27, 2007 10:01 AM

The elections are going to be here sooner or later and knowing your candidates will be a deciding factor when voting... obvious yes, but how many people actually take the time to look into things? Well we decided to put together some campaign ads made by and for a couple of the top contenders. Aside from these videos though be sure to browse the lesser candidates for some pretty good laughs. But here these are:

Mrs. Hillary Clinton everyone, let's give her a round of applause, then maybe she can make those decisions.

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Oh Boy Those Crazy Canadians

Posted December 26, 2007 10:21 AM

We all know that there are some differences between us and our cousins up north, like how we talk, how we lock our doors, our crime rates, etc. So of course new contrasts are going to continue to spring up among so many others. One of those is how government manipulates the people using fear. Many support the idea that governments use fear to enact urgency in people so that bureaucrats can get things done quickly and with little opposition, because who's going to say no when their life is on the line? Not you or I that's for sure. It's obviously a very powerful influence, so how are others using it?

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The 6 Million Dollar Ache

Posted December 20, 2007 10:14 AM

Steve Austin, astronaut. A man barely alive. Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic man. Steve Austin will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster... All words you'd hope to hear after getting caught on the back hand of this little game. It's called Nut Tappers. Pretty self explanatory obviously, but let's explore why it's funny, there is a reason.

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Last Minute Guy Gifts

Posted December 19, 2007 10:29 AM

It's coming down to the wire now with only a few days left to pick up some gifts. Whether it's been a tough time figuring what to buy or you're just running up on gift giving a little late, you don't need to worry. There is an easy gift to give that can't go wrong. Gift cards. You can pick up gift cards and certificates for just about any business, but Amazon.com is by far the most versatile with gifts from hundreds of stores and new and used options for just about every one. That means great deals and great selection all at the same place. You can even have them emailed to the recipient.

Fun In The Office.. Or Really Anywhere

Posted December 19, 2007 10:14 AM

You've surely been in a situation like this: you're having a conversation with someone that is telling a story about what another person was saying. Then they start in on something that that person said which was a bunch of bull, so what do you do? You give a couple ghost-faps and share a laugh. What happens when you or someone else gives the fap to the person they're conversing with?

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Information For You. And Anyone Else.

Posted December 18, 2007 9:35 AM

Congratulations Americans, the polls are in and apparently we're all more conceited! A study by the Pew Internet and American Life Project said about 47 percent of U.S. adult Internet users have looked for information about themselves through Google or another search engine. Now that could just mean that people are curious about what information is available about themselves online where any person can access it, but what it does mean is that we want to research ourselves. The internet knows all so why wouldn't it know all about you and I?

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Smovies For Breakfast Make A Healthy Christmas

Posted December 17, 2007 9:20 AM

Welcome welcome, guys and gals of all ages. We have for you the next step in Christmas movie recommendations. That's right, now when you read a review you'll have the trailer right there to get your own take on it too, though our word is really all you will ever need. Ever. We do hope that you enjoy the trailers, it should make for easier gift selections for the guys. Enough of the jibber jabber...go ahead and check em out. Let the show begin!

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9/11, What?

Posted December 13, 2007 10:46 AM

There's been another terrorist attack on America, land of the free home of the brave. At approximately 10:23 pacific standard time a small uhaul truck, determined to have been packed with 300 pounds of weapons grade enriched uranium explosive, drove to a park west of downtown Los Angeles in the holy place we know as Hollywood. Millions have perished with the numbers steadily climbing as more people are brought to hospitals; who by the way were not nearly ready for such a massive influx of radiated patients and are now calling for support from the surrounding counties and states to help them in this time of need. This is an exclusive breaking news story so you won't find it anywhere else. Like anywhere. So don't bother looking, just run outside and panic and scream.

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Guy Gifts For The Maladjusted Jokester

Posted December 13, 2007 10:36 AM

Welcome to the land of Guy Gift Ideas! We have a large selection of ideas (secret ones) that we're posting here to share with you and all the world. Today's selection for the guys consists of some fun/kinda disturbing sometimes gifts that he's sure to enjoy. Some of the items are probably better suited as stocking-stuffers, but overall these are best considered to be the guy version of something that's cute. Take a look and see if some of these gifts fit the guy you're looking for.

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Best Cartoon In The Universe

Posted December 11, 2007 10:44 AM

Really more than a cartoon, Futurama is a collection of characters and situations that will have you rolling on the ground. Developed by Matt Groening and David X. Cohen you might be wary(?) but it won an Emmy, recognition by even the people who have not and will never watch it and proof enough that it is a good show. In fact they even came out with a new Futurama movie, Bender's Big Score. It's awesome through and through with the best ending anyone could ever hope for in a movie.

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Geek Week Gifts

Posted December 11, 2007 9:56 AM

As holiday shopping continues in full swing we present a solid round up on interesting gadgets from the guys at ThinkGeek. Now don't be frightened off by the name, these are some geeks who know where it's at. They've got a selection of gadgets and gizmos that any guy would be envious of, are envious of if they've visited the site before. This particular gift selection we've collected features gifts for the office guy, along with a few geek extras that are definitely worth checking out. And ruining our office guy gift theme, but hey sometimes you just need to get up on stuff.

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Video Game Gifts For Guys

Posted December 10, 2007 10:54 AM

If you haven't read Guy Gamer Gifts then make sure and do so, but check out the latest in sweet selections we've thrown together for you guys. We've got game gifts up for all the big systems, Xbox 360, Playstation 3, Wii, and of course the PC. And you can be sure these are all top games to get, all provided to you free of stress. The only thing you need to keep in mind is that most every title is offered for more systems than we're able to show so don't make any hasty decisions because of what you see at first. Other than that just kick back and enjoy the guy gift ideas that make your life easier.

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Guy Gamer Gifts

Posted December 10, 2007 9:49 AM

Every guy has some kind of system. If he doesn't/you don't then find out which you're gonna get so you can check out these top games to get for guys. The games run all over the map but they do have a couple things in common. First off these are among the top games to get. Second they have amazing graphics, while thirdly any and all guys will have a great time digging in and playing this collection of supreme titles.

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Absinthe Ban Lifted In US

Posted December 9, 2007 11:22 AM

That's right, you guys really just read those words. The United States has lifted its ban on the production and sale of absinthe with wormwood and companies are rearing up and readying to start pushing their products. It's not the same as traditional absinthe in that it doesn't have any thujone in it, an ingredient thought to be responsible for the drinks psychotropic effects, but that actually has no such effect, meaning you still get the real deal.

So far there are St. George Spirits and Lucid being the two main distillers of absinthe with wormwood in the US. We're sure there are some more out there already or will be soon though. Keep looking, but really just rejoice at the fact that ABSINTHE IS FINALLY LEGAL HERE!!!

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Digital Jingles Every Which Way

Posted December 7, 2007 9:09 AM

mp_greatestgadget_f.jpgTis the season... for a history lesson! Not really though, more of a comparison between then and now concerning some technology that people used to get along fine without. That's right, telephones. In 1959 we had the Western Electric 500 telephone, then came touch tone, then cordless and now of course we've wireless.

Wireless phones have turned each human into an epicenter for communication, receiving calls from any location at any hour. Unlike the WE 500, which by 1955 had only innovated beyond 5 new colors, there are a plethora of cell phone and pda choices for you to pick from. Since phones and other gadgets are such great guy gifts we thought a cell phone selection would make for some good holiday shopping.

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It's Your Choice Dawg

Posted December 6, 2007 10:05 AM

Alright guys this is a warning as well as a hook up: video games kick ass. Even better is that they've gone into a realm of gaming that is constantly mind-blowing. For instance the new game Assassin's Creed for Xbox360 is honestly so amazing it's definitely the number one game worth getting (make sure you get the console to match). Then there is the Wii, today's technology with a classic touch. If you have other consoles and not a Wii you are seriously missing out plus apparently the Wii is good for your health. At the very least play some Metroid on it before you start to say you don't like it. As for the PlayStation 3, well it's just an insane piece of hardware and tech (with a price tag to match). Gran Turismo 5 Prologue is amazing if you like racing games, but really other than that it's just a matter of you deciding whether you'd rather have an Xbox360 or the PS3, but one thing to remember: Halo 3 is Xbox.

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Extravideoaganza

Posted December 4, 2007 10:45 AM

The Internet as a whole is ridiculously awesome. There is so much information and communication operating on a global level, all of it available at the click of a button. Given this global reach it's no surprise of the magnitude of junk that is also available online. One are that seems to be exonerated from the junk category are online videos. Maybe it's because of You ube, but nonetheless people are either watching videos or staring in them, no matter how bizarre the topic. One of the most impressive things about online videos is the sheer number of them. You can find funny videos, morbid videos, disgusting videos, informative videos, as well as lots and lots of completely worthless ones (just skip those..except for that one (just so you know what to skip)).

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A Newsline Special

Posted December 3, 2007 11:33 AM

There are many problems facing today's youth that are twisted and upsetting, even more so because of how little we know of them. Societies predators have adapted well to hide among us, appearing innocent until the situation presents itself for them to strike. This problem facing today's America, is bro rape. And even though it's guyville instead of broville, that doesn't mean that we aren't sympathetic to those bros in need. As many people as possible need to lend them the care they deserve. That's right, we're calling for all of you to be predators.

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Fitness Redefined As Fun

Posted December 3, 2007 9:48 AM

The Wii Fit is here! To buy that is because it sure isn't being released in the US of A anytime soon (next year?). What's up with that? Doesn't the entire world know about our country's weight problem? And here we are thinking the Japanese are all knowing in the business world (they are).



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Tis The Season

Posted November 30, 2007 1:14 PM

It is the season indeed and that means time to buckled down on what your guy gifts are going to be. The options are in the process of being amassed, making it easier for you to choose the route of gifts that are "just him" gifts or gifts that you can enjoy too. Whichever you choose though, make sure that it's still a gift that he'll really enjoy. And that doesn't mean it has to be something useful, just something that can be picked up every now and then for him to have some fun.

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Manhunt

Posted November 29, 2007 11:37 AM

Just like the hunt for gifts, the first Manhunt is just a taste of what you're in for this Christmas. Either one of them a perfect guy gift in itself, the first having been banned in several countries and this second one supposedly being better/worse. Better if you're a twisted mother that likes to actually kill people (but not really). Supposedly there is a crack that opens Manhunt 2's violence and gore up to where it was originally going to be. Check it out if you're looking for that great gift. It's one of those go big or go home kind of things, why else would you play it?



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Gifts And Comics That Appreciate

Posted November 29, 2007 9:52 AM

With so many stand up comedians today it's sometimes hard to sit down and try out someone new. I can't tell you how many times I've sat down to watch some Comedy Central Presents (Mitch Hedberg and a couple others are good though) just to change the channel after the first five minutes of watching some jack off try and be funny. They're all too concerned over making it big and showing just how funny they can be on tv. It's all too rehearsed. They need to have a game plan obviously but once they're up there they need to go with things a little better, say the things that come to mind however "not funny" they may appear. I want real comedy, real people. We all should.

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Yea, Work Sucks...

Posted November 28, 2007 9:38 AM

A video not made by the guys over at derrickcomedy.com fails horribly at capturing opposites. Honestly nothing they say in any way relates to what a real life opposite day experience is like. I mean you would think that an opposite day would be filled with people saying things that are funny and not confusing, but they didn't do just the opposite. And don't imagine for a second that it might actually be fun to try and have your office celebrate, this is actually way easier than it looks, though it is really dumb and stupid and probably never worth a shot. Don't try it.

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Guy Gifts All Around

Posted November 22, 2007 10:22 AM

If you're still wondering what gifts to buy him this holiday season just remember that black Friday and cyber Monday are right around the corner so it's time to start making some decisions quick. Hopefully these gifts for men lists that we have been putting together are giving you ideas on what to buy your man. We're doing our best to find the cream of the crop, but if you're looking for something that our lists haven't revealed, drop us a comment at the bottom of this blog and we'll research it. Anyway here's today's list:

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Black Friday Should Really Be Ten Days Earlier...But Still On A Friday...

Posted November 21, 2007 9:06 AM

The first big stop on the shopping countdown is only a couple days away and some game planning is in order. It's not like you're going to be alone out there and it won't matter how much Sunday (?) night football you've been watching, you're not going to get through the line without some kind of structure. We've got five rules that should help at least a little in there (rabies shots aren't listed but that should have happened a while ago, get in the game).

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Kick Back, Relax, And Enjoy The Gifts

Posted November 20, 2007 9:52 AM

That's right guys, it's time to lay back and enjoy the touch of another. Whether it be your wife or girlfriend or massage therapist or, what with the massive shopping about to take place, massage furniture/appliances. Now if you've never had a massage before you'll need to know there are different massages to choose from. Some types include swedish and deep-tissue, Swedish being a lighter and more gentle massage, both of which are very common. With all of the options for massage available though you really have a lot of ways to choose from. Enjoy!

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Guy Gifts For The Office Space

Posted November 19, 2007 9:33 AM

Got a bad case of the Mondays? Yeahhhh.. I'm gonna go ahead and have you take a look at these and cheer up a little then.

We know work can be a drag sometimes, but that isn't because it's crappy (not a guarantee). Instead think of it as a loss of the self. It makes perfect sense. You start the job, you like the job, you're there for however long, you start to get annoyed with the job... what comes next. You find some way to get some more of your "self" back in the workplace.

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Catch 'Em In The Kitchen

Posted November 16, 2007 12:46 PM

Contrary to popular sexist beliefs guys do spend time in the kitchen. If not the kitchen then they sure better be outside barbecuing or something. Every person should know how to cook no matter who or what they are. It is an essential life lesson, preparing your own food. Doing so usually means having at least a little of the right gear though so this year you might consider helping a guy furnish and advance his kitchen and cooking.

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A Man For The People

Posted November 15, 2007 9:53 AM

Actually THE man for the people. People magazine recently published this year's list of sexiest men with none other than Matt Damon heading it up. Starring in freaking awesome movies like any and all of the The Bourne Trilogy as well as the Ocean's Trilogy. He won an Oscar for best writing (as a screenplay written directly for the screen) with Good Will Hunting and was nominated for best actor in a leading role for that same film. He has also been nominated for Emmy's and Golden Globe Awards, even winning one of those. So with all of his acknowledged accomplishments and now the title of sexiest man of the year awarded to him by people the question still lingers, why is Matt Damon such a douche bag?

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Business Time With The Conchords

Posted November 14, 2007 9:57 AM

There are plenty of comedians out there, but one of the funniest types are those guys that sing their humor. Demetri Martin is one comedian that has really nailed singing as well as presentational comedy when he busts out his big drawing pad. Zach Galifianakis also does bits in his stand up with a piano. With both of these comedians and surely a great many more out there that have an original style with their music and humor it is always fun to happen on a new comedian that does things good. In this case it is actually two comedians, the two members of Flight of the Conchords.

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Perfect, A Post-Rock Future

Posted November 13, 2007 9:18 AM

Post-rock has made a huge impact on today's music. A genre name that has fallen out of favor, but continues to describe the style nonetheless. The genre uses musical instruments commonly associated with rock music to create rhythms, harmonies, melodies, timbre, and chord progressions that are not found in rock tradition. An easier way to look at it is the use of 'rock instrumentation' for non-rock purposes. If not already a fan, the music is perfect for any guy that likes to have good music always running in the background and really any guy with a taste for brilliantly composed music.

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Unique Gifts for Guys...Who Like to Get Their Drink On

Posted November 9, 2007 12:39 PM

Just something a little different, but who's exactly the same? Getting a unique gift may be a little more expensive or a little more obscure and hard to find (exactly why this is here for you), but when you aren't quite sure what to get you can be guaranteed that something your friend/man/husband hasn't seen or heard of before will make him happy. Obviously keep the gift within his likes and dislikes, but other than that run free. Give it a go and see if some of these gifts are the gift for him.

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PSA: Don't Be A Fool

Posted November 7, 2007 9:52 AM

Every guy wants to be able to get lost in the wilderness and survive off the land. Some might be able do so with proper training and experience, but one thing that you can't do is survive alone in the wilderness because you watch Man vs. Wild. You just can't. Star of the show Bear Grylls might be able to pull off survival (having a film crew follow you around is the same as surviving alone apparently) but it takes a little more cajones and, more importantly, knowledge. What it all boils down to though is that no matter what day profession you have or how religiously you watch the show, watching Man vs. Wild will still be the equivalent of tugging one out on a patch of grass.

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The Countdown: Housewife List

Posted November 5, 2007 9:38 AM

Hello guys and, more importantly, gals. This is the beginning of this year's Guyville Christmas list for guy gifts. It is still November, but we wanted to start getting some ideas out there so all of you responsible early Christmas shoppers can go ahead and begin your search, that is of course if you haven't already finished. Being a list for guy gifts however you'll find that this one is primarily centered around electronics, awesome.

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Ingenious Designs Of Past Times

Posted November 2, 2007 1:29 PM

Today we're gonna give it up for guy ingenuity. With everything that happens in the world, both unique or seemingly not, perspective is essential. And with all of the records of these happenings we have at our disposal (i.e pictures, video, audio, etc) that perspective gains a new power, the power to create a masterpiece. Whether it's something intense or dramatic or funny, though all of those are a matter of opinion, it takes an innovative mind to recreate an event in an different image.

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Stealing Has Never Been So Funny

Posted November 1, 2007 10:00 AM

Ladies and gentlemen, guys and girls, (children shouldn't be reading this) welcome to the wonderful world premier of pickpocketing. He's got panache. He's got style. He's even got...everything you own? This folks is the master thief of magicians Bob Arno. Originally hailing from Stockholm, Sweden he now travels all over the world performing comedy routines centered around his lifting audience members.

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Psychology One-Oh-One: Guys

Posted October 31, 2007 10:00 AM

Good morning guys, class is now starting for the psychology of guys and boy is this gonna be quick. We'll start off with some basics and wrap everything up with a video and then questions and comments. So to begin we'll start with a quick compare and contrast between men and women. Biologically speaking our bodies are very similar concerning functions and general makeup, however there are some glaring differences, mainly our minds.

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Darko Choco Definitely Rockos

Posted October 30, 2007 10:15 AM

Chocolate. The gift of the gods, there is not one person in the world who doesn't like chocolate. Some people may say that they don't like it, but really they are just kidding themselves. They don't like Hershey's chocolate or Nestle chocolate or any of that other crap candy. No, real chocolate isn't a candy, it's an explosion of taste bud love that can actually be good for you. The secret? Dark chocolate.

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This Guy Knows Halloween

Posted October 29, 2007 10:12 AM

Halloween is coming up fast and some of you guys are probably realizing that you still don't have a costume. You've only got two days to whip one out, so what are you gonna do? No worries guys because we have THE solution. Not for you guys though. Bummer. The solution is for your ladies though. That's right, whether they already have a costume or not, they need to go and get one from the best costume shop in the world.

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Halloween Screams And Shivers, On Film

Posted October 24, 2007 9:26 AM

Movie time for fright night (not the movie, definitely not scary though there was that scene from his bedroom to his neighbors..) is always a time to be sure. There are plenty of purely gory movies out there and plenty suspenseful ones too, but finding that balance between the two is what makes a great scary movie.

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Electro Funk Daddy Superstar Cookin

Posted October 23, 2007 9:37 AM

There are always things out there that you should and shouldn't watch and cooking shows are right there on the edge. The Food Network has some okay ones with Iron Chef and Emeril, though if I hear one more bam from him that's exactly what he's getting, but that's probably why they're on a television channel. No, the real cooks (pronounced cewks here) are on the internet cooking shows.

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These Bears Are Grizzly

Posted October 19, 2007 1:16 PM

When you hear someone say bears the first thing that comes to mind is an animal or sports team, that's it. Just grizzled fur and thickly muscled bodies that munch on nuts and berries all day. Or the sports teams, whether they're swing bats and hitting balls to the rim of the stadium or handing off and passing balls to each other. The funny thing about that is never again will those be your first thoughts.

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Eat Your Salad Fingers This Halloween

Posted October 17, 2007 9:36 AM

Halloween is gonna be rolling around here soon guys so it's important to get in the mood. You know, be a little festive. Whether that's giving little ghoul and goblin children candy, dressing up yourself, or throwing a kick ass Halloween party for all the friends, you'll be doing your part for the holiday. And don't even think of not doing something (Simpson's Halloween specials do count as something), this is America and we celebrate every holiday regardless of its ties to ancient evil-doers; but personally we think druids are kick ass.

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Geometry, The New Bar Smarts

Posted October 11, 2007 9:44 AM

Good morning class. I hope you guys are preparing for this weekends drinking extravaganza. That means no staying home. No, it's out to the pub for you and today's lesson is going to earn you some free drinks, hopefully. You'll be learning about a proposition bet using full-blown basic geometry that is almost sure to win it for you.

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Evil Gaming To Come

Posted October 1, 2007 10:28 AM

Video/computer games hold a dear spot in any guys heart, but the ones that settle in the deepest, darkest parts are always the most intense kind of fun. If you've played F.E.A.R. First Encounter Assault Recon or Condemned Criminal Origins, you'll have some idea as to where we're at, but Clive Barker's Jericho is going to take the cake. Hitting the shelves October 23, this purely evil video game is going to consume your soul.

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Zombies Shmombies We'll Still Be Here

Posted September 24, 2007 10:30 AM

Alright guys we've all wondered what the apocalypse would be like, whether it's a giant meteorite or an alien invasion or (fingers crossed!) zombies. There's been enough movies to give everyone as many ideas as they'll ever need, not to mention whatever your imagination might have dreamed up. Either way none of us is planning on getting bit and turning undead, which is why we need to be prepared for when it does happen.

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Bravo Law Enforcement! You Suck!

Posted September 19, 2007 9:49 AM

You guys have all had to deal with them at least once and if not, you're just lucky and you will soon enough. Police. The necessary force for maintaining order and peace, they protect us from the bad people that threaten the livelihood of innocent citizens. They have been an essential piece of a well functioning society for as long as society has existed, driven by the fact that some people do not want to submit to the greater authority. This disobedience can range all over the map from murders to drugs to simply trying to be heard as a human being. We should notice that that is where the discrepancy lies.

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Our Landlords Rock

Posted September 18, 2007 9:59 AM

Every guy out there knows that renting, whether it be an apartment or house, always brings along a little human baggage. We are of course talking about the landlord, that shadowy ghost who seems to dominate your mind at the beginning of every month. Just how much though depends on what kind of landlord they are.

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David Blaine is magical

Posted September 6, 2007 1:23 PM

Big Poppa David Blaine is taking street magic to a whole new level. Call him crazy, call him stupid, but one thing about him will always remain untouchable, he's stupid. But if you thought his previous stunts were intense, this new one will leave you speechless. He hasn't revealed any details (yet) but he's started preparing and training for the most dangerous and death-defying challenge of his career. It will be airing live in May of 2008.

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Apple owns like no other

Posted September 5, 2007 11:22 AM

Steve Jobs held a special event today presenting Apple's productions and plans concerning the iPod and the digital music movement. Apparently Apple is owning, or at least beginning to, in sales of music. How about throwing out some facts and figures, courtesy of Ryan Block over at engadget, so everyone can get an idea: 600 million copies of iTunes distributed, over 3 billion songs purchased on iTunes, and 95 million TV shows purchased. Freaking amazing, but I guess it makes sense seeing as 32% of the music sales last year were solely digital.

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Be an angel and play Halo 3

Posted August 24, 2007 9:36 PM

It looks like it's going to be an early Christmas this year guys, three months to be exact so start saving up. The finished Halo 3 code was released by Bungie Studios to manufacturers to start kicking out the retail versions. It's got all the crazy graphics and weapons and storyline that's come to be expected from Halo, but with a surprise addition, a versatile multiplayer map editor called the Forge, which lets you tinker with everything save basic level geometries. According to Brad Shoemaker over at Gamespot the Forge is one-part level editor and one-part Garry's Mod from Half-life 2, which sounds like it'll make for some insane raging multiplayer showdowns. The expected release date is September 25th and can be bought in-store just about everywhere. However if dealing with a mob doesn't sound too enticing you can also preorder Halo 3 online. Take a quick peek at the madness you're in for.
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Size DOES Matter - Baseball Bat for King Kong

Posted August 13, 2007 8:44 AM

Know someone who has everything? I'll bet they don't have this:

Baseball Main

For $480, you can give someone the biggest bat in the locker room. And no nasty side effects, either...

Wood-Joy.com Giant Baseball Bats

Bucket O' Brew Teases Me Mercilessly

Posted August 13, 2007 7:21 AM

I've received flowers a few times. They make my eyes water. Because I'm allergic, and because, let's face it, it's embarrassing. By the time the 500th person has walked by my desk, winked and said "Oooooh, you have a secret admirer." I want to set the flowers on fire in the parking lot.

Now, if someone would send me a few beers, that'd be great. And now you can: Bucket O' Brew will send a bucket of suds to anyone in...

Dang.

They only deliver in Boise, Eagle, Meridian, Garden City, Caldwell and Nampa. In Idaho.

Oh well. It sure sounds like a good idea. Everyone e-mail Bucket O' Brew - bucketobrew AT qwest DOT net - and tell them you want them to deliver in Washington State, will you?

Pb 768 X 495-1

7 Reasons 'Geek' is the New 'Cool'

Posted August 7, 2007 2:13 PM

Bill Gates rawwwwwks man! Why? Because now I'm cool. Why? Here's the reasons, in no particular order:

  1. Earning potential. Duh. I may be broke now but one of these days my stock options will vest...
  2. Great conversation. Forget about the stammering stereotype. Geeks are chock full of fun anecdotes. I broke the ice with my future wife by showing her a binary star system.
  3. Great genes. All those brains to pass on...
  4. Better companionship. Sure we like sports just fine. But ballet is cool too! And seeing weird foreign countries, or trying foods we can't identify or pronounce.
  5. Your own IT department. Face it, you live at your computer, too. We'll make sure it always works.
  6. We're great with kids. No kid can resist a dad who can explode a balloon in a microwave, or tell the entire Lord of the Rings as a bed time story.
  7. Sex appeal. Not only is pasty the new tan, but we read a lot of, uh, instructional stuff. Plus we have better imaginations. We spent our high school years dateless, ladies. When we hit 45 we won't be looking for a comfy chair - we'll still be chasing you around the house.

Stick that in yer beer cans and drink, all you ex-high school jocks.

Chuck & Larry - Offensive?

Posted July 30, 2007 11:32 AM

There's a big hullabaloo over “I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry”. Is it offensive/hard to understand? Is it fine? Is it really clever? Is it just a lame movie?

We thought we'd ask you, our readers:

Reservoir Dogs 15th Anniversary Edition

Posted July 27, 2007 4:18 PM

The Denver Egotist noticed a new version of Reservoir Dogs is coming out, with nifty cool packaging.

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The package does not include an ear, as far as I know, or uppers for the depression I inevitably fall into after watching this excellent, but pitch dark, movie.

And Reservoir Dogs is the ultimate guy movie, no question.

Buy it on Amazon, if you want to: Reservoir Dogs On Amazon.

And may I suggest a nice flask for your whiskey? It'll make the movie go down easier.

National Tequila Day

Posted July 22, 2007 9:41 PM

267 reminds us that the 24th is National Tequila Day. Gotta admit I haven't had straight tequila since the Great Tequila Shooter Massacre of , but 267 has some cool infused versions of the stuff that might be worth a look.

267.com

9 Year Old Steals Car From His Kidnappers

Posted July 19, 2007 12:05 PM

This kid rocks!!! Assuming this isn't a new urban myth...

Robbers held up a 9-year-old child and his mom as they drove through Haikou (China). They pulled the mother out and threw her to the curb, then drove away.

Two hours later, the police received a report that a small boy had crashed a car into an agricultural vehicle:

"Yang, a witness to the second incident, said: "A small boy got out of the car with his hands shaking and said: 'Some people stole my mom's car, and I drove it away when they weren't paying attention'."

[ Ananova ]

Guyville Contest: Worst Guy Gifts Ever

Posted July 18, 2007 7:49 AM

OK everyone, looking for a little input: What's the worst gift you've ever received? Bring out the ties, the socks, the leopard-print undies and any other horrific tales you've got.

The best worst will get a spiffy Guyville shirt as, uh, a gift.

And of course you'll all get the honor of ending up on Guyville, complete with a link if you send us your site.

E-mail your submissions, with a photo if possible, to contest@guyville.com.

Swiss Army - It's Got it All

Posted July 17, 2007 6:30 AM

41689C7A7Hl. Aa280 Really it's not about quality or quantity...it's about both. That little red Swiss Army Knife is still the handiest guy gift around. If you're going to throw down on one though, make sure it's got all the bells and whistles like this awesome Victorinox.

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Rockin' Ultimate Hoodie

Posted July 6, 2007 2:02 PM

0706 Hoodie Tg 275 The Ultimate Hoodie has a management system built into it's threading to allow you to listen to your MP3 player or IPhone without having a tangled mess of wires to slow you down. Everyone loves hoodies as they make both a fashion statement about your youthfulness (even if you're old like me) and they are functional.

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Never Too Late To Plan For Holidays

Posted June 29, 2007 4:42 PM

All right, I know it's really really insanely early, so instead of showing you or telling you about exactly what gifts for men you should be buying, we're simply going to show you the gifts for guys you should NOT be getting. Enjoy this hilarious 30 second video. Free...as in on the house.

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No More Cats! I Mean Cat Hair

Posted June 26, 2007 3:54 PM

41Aeserjsjl. Sl210 Let's face facts, guys, we're never going to win the battle of getting rid of her pesky cat, or even convince her that the cat would be happier as an outdoor kitty. Some fights you just have to leave alone. My favorite anti-cat story was when a fed-up boyfriend, angry at one of the many cat misbehaviors decided to exact revenge and did so by defecating (apparently 3 days worth) into the 9 pound kitty's litter box. The boyfriend was thrilled when, in a panic, his lover took the cat to the emergency kitty hospital with a bag filled with the oversized fecal matter and cried that poor fluffy must be extremely ill to have so much number two inside that tiny little body.

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Practical Gifts For Guys

Posted June 19, 2007 3:21 PM

Or practical gifts for anyone. I love this Jeff Foxworthy video on gift giving. It's hilarious and true, and though it is a Christmas theme, I can't wait until December to share it with you. It's all about giving practical gifts, and hey, don't we all need extra light bulbs and canned goods?

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Not All Wallets Are Created Equal

Posted June 15, 2007 12:08 PM

41Q8St9G4Dl. Sl210 Wallets are a tricky thing to buy as a guy gift. Every guy has different needs and not unlike women, they carry a variety of things. Some guys have more credit cards than others and some carry 50 pictures of their kids. Tops on the wallet list is this awesome Tommy Hilfiger Men's Wallet. If you're a vegetarian, this will suit you just fine because it's made out of soft polished lamb.

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Free Beer For Father's Day?

Posted June 14, 2007 12:06 PM

T 20859 Well, kinda sorta. Technically there isn't any such thing as free beer. But the spirit of this vintage "Free Beer" sign is a beer lover's must have item in the bar area. Looking for the perfect gifts for him before it's too late, then click on our Guyville Store button and shop til you drop.

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A Father's Day Must Have Gift

Posted June 11, 2007 3:13 PM

21Nj9Dje2Bl. Sl210 The Weber Baby Q Portable Gas Grill will most likely be the greatest fathers day present you could give dad this year. At only $115 it has all the tools to actually replace dad's big and clunky grill. It's small but mighty and has 189 square inches of primary cooking space. It uses propane, but not the big, clunky containers, this one needs only 14.1 ounce container (think small fire extinguisher size).

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Guyville Challenge? No Thanks

Posted June 11, 2007 8:19 AM

We're happy to take on challenges like throwing a football or doing a slam dunk. But dressing in medieval armor and pounding each other bloody seems like a bit much.

I will not participate in a sport where I walk out on a field knowing for certain I will get hit with a piece of rattan. Incredibly bruising video after the break:

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Gifts For Chicks?

Posted June 9, 2007 8:59 AM

51Acwvxlkzl. Sl210 Well, just this one time. See I was mostly confused to find out that the World Food Feed Bag was a top 3 seller on Amazon and then I discovered what they actually do. You see we really love the idea of feeding the world, and clearly this is for a great cause. The sale of one bag will feed a child for an entire school year. Awesome to spread the wealth as we are the richest nation in the world. As Bono famously said, we don't know how lucky we are that every time we want it we simply turn a handle and we have clean, drinkable water at our fingertips.

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Solar Lights - Because the Sun Rules!

Posted June 8, 2007 1:42 PM

41Plqfl2Bml. Sl210 Yes the sun is hot...and it's powerful, AND I just decided to spruce up my yard and for the princely sum of $99 bucks I got this awesome Strathwood Chelsea Solar Light (set of 12). These things are selling like hot cakes, and not the lousy wheat laced hot cakes, the really great tasting and fattening Swedish style hot cakes. You get it. They're a top 60 seller at Amazon...so you know it's good - and I hear it's made from real panther too - (an Anchorman reference, oi, now I'm explaining my jokes).

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Nothing Like A Cold Beverage

Posted June 4, 2007 3:55 PM

41Yb0As213L. Sl210 Nothing makes a guy more upset then when he's on his recliner watching the big game and asks his beloved for a cold one only to hear the heartbreaking reply, "Get it yourself you fat mongrel." Which in itself is not remotely upsetting. The upsetting part is when it's followed by, "All the beers are in the garage anyway. They aren't cold." Now that will bring tears to a grown man's eyes.

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Jump On My Hog!

Posted June 2, 2007 6:40 AM

11M4Ut36Lfl. Sl75 Get your minds out of the gutter! I'm talking about Harleys! If you can't afford the Soft Tail or the Fat Boy, or even the Sportster, fear not...your wife probably won't even let you think about buying it anyway. Imagine the tune "You'll shoot your eye out" from a Christmas Story but the lyrics sounding like this, "You'll end up roadkill, you'll end up roadkill." Yeah, forget about it, no Harley for you. Instead we bring you the next best thing.

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Good News For Star Wars Geeks

Posted May 27, 2007 7:32 AM

Starwars Genius George Lucas is posting 250 clips from all six Star Wars Films that will be posted at www.starwars.com for any and all S.W. geeks to edit, tweak and mess around with any way they see fit. It’s an interesting turnaround from the fierce protector of intellectual property "Lucas" that we’ve all known and loved for 30 years now.

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I Must Have One

Posted May 21, 2007 8:45 PM

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Next to a genuine Hitori Hanzo, this t-shirt is now my must-have Father's Day present:

Spoilt t-shirt. Make folks who haven't read Harry Potter yet cry.

The Right TV Choice For You

Posted May 21, 2007 3:56 PM

51Sz7Tj9S2L. Sl210 Televisions, sports cars and surf and turf, now these are things that men are interested in. In the market for gifts for him? Fathers day is rapidly approaching and if you haven't yet figured out the whole cyber world of gifts for men, then we're here to lend you a hand. Men.Style.com posted a recent article about Flat-Panel TV's that was very informative. I can summarize some of it for you here.

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What Mom Wants For Mothers Day

Posted May 8, 2007 6:08 PM

Hpim0010-1 Ah, Mothers Day...the day where we show our love to the one who gave us life. How can we tell this all important woman how much she means to us? Because truly, mom is number one and she should be revered, however, in the same breath, we don't want to blow too much money on a present...because let's face it pretty soon it'll be her birthday, then ten other birthdays from other family members, and then Christmas will be here, and Valentines Day again...it's exhausting. The truth is, what mom likely really wants is for you to make her a nice dinner at home and maybe give her some lovely flowers.

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Poker - A Legal Issue...

Posted May 4, 2007 3:17 PM

Poker

...but still a great game. Even though all of the gaming sites were banned by Congress last September as college kids racked up huge debt loads on their cards as the lure proved too much for them, the debate continues as to whether or not poker is a game of luck or of skill. The Wall Street Journal Claims:

"By making the case for poker as a skill, aficionados hope to roll back the law, and win the game newfound freedoms in states where wagering is currently banned."

As lawmakers and poker professionals continue the debate of whether this gutty game is a game of chance or skill, I share with you a story...

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Real gifts for men...Kids

Posted May 3, 2007 12:18 PM

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Here's a story we've just heard about that is very funny, but at the same time has us seriously doubting this person's parenting skills...

So I’m getting ready for work in my bathroom and Samantha (4 years old) is getting ready for school in her room. We can’t see each other, but she’s only about 8 feet or so away from me. Out of the blue I do a Mickey Mouse voice (one I’ve never done before) and say (high pitched and LOUD) “Hi Samantha! It’s Mickey Mouse!!” She immediately starts screaming and bursts into terrified tears. “AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!” and goes tearing down the hallway. Now..it’s not immediately apparent to me what has happened, because scaring her wasn’t my intention. So I thought she fell, hurt herself and I chased after her, “Honey, are you okay?” - “ahhhh, Mickey Mouse is here somewhere and he scared me...ahhhhh mickey mouse scared me! where is he?!”
So I told her it was just me pretending, nothing to be scared of and I hugged her. All was fine until...

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Riding the Segway

Posted April 27, 2007 4:48 PM

9030461047282358 It's not that I'm not on board with new gas-less ways of getting around, but I just can't get my noggin wrapped around this Segway concept. I really want to get behind it, but you know they're pretty pricey (in the thousands) and other than wanting to rip around the golf course and do donuts, I can't quite imagine myself loading up and heading off to work on the insane streets of Los Angeles on one of these bad boys.

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Pepper Spray - Still A Cool Guy Gift

Posted April 22, 2007 8:02 AM

B0007Vm960.01-Avdtrh6Imv3Ol. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 V23275613 It never fails, every time I see Mace pepper spray I automatically think of Ron Burgundy's fight with Veronica Corningstone where he sprays himself in the eye. If this ends up being one of your gifts for him items, make sure he doesn't do that. This particular Mace product is not available for sale in New York or Massachusetts - and as we've all heard from Brian Fantana, "So you know it's good."

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The Guy Gift Must Have

Posted April 11, 2007 5:18 PM

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You'll occasionally see gift ideas for men that may not initially strike you as being super flashy. Let's face it, you can only say so many wonderful things about the Wii and PS3. They're great. It's tops on the gifts for men list. We get it loud and clear. But then there is a gift like the Porter Cable Variable Speed Orbit Polisher. Those hard water stains on his black car will stand zero chance of survival when this device (originally intended as an orbital sander) gets its polishing pad on the hood.

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Tiger Needs A Good Luck Charm

Posted April 8, 2007 8:42 AM

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So, it's Sunday morning. Nobody realizes this but I've managed to sneak a pair of the coolest Golf Ball Cufflinks as good luck charms into Tiger's golf bag in Georgia. It wasn't easy either. First off, try getting into Augusta while the Masters is going on. So if my favorite golfer in the world, who can nearly hit it out there with our very own Guyville Guy can put together an extraordinary round today and win this fantastic golf tournament, you'll know it was these awesome good luck charms.

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TV Still Coming To the Net

Posted March 27, 2007 10:40 AM

Logo Who doesn't love a little Jack Black? Even when he takes roles that aren't necessarily right for him (anyone see "The Holiday?") he still has that X factor that appeals to us. It's likely because we just want to see how he's going to make an ass out of himself this time. I'm all for it, and I've even seen "Envy" twice...and I think we know that wasn't his best work - most have said those awful three words that are just a killer..."Un-Watch-Able." Whatever with all that. I love the guy, and I love the new project he's E.P.ing (that's fancy H-Wood speak for Executive Producing). Viacom's VH-1 network has recently launched, Acceptable TV which has a compilation of short, original and edgy programming as TV continues its surge towards the net.

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The Ritual - A Drop Will Do Ya

Posted March 23, 2007 4:05 PM

Ritual I am one of those guys who unfortunately eats like a garbage disposal. A normal meal for me consists of meat, garnished with pork, complimented with a side of ground beef cheese potatoes. Yes, I like everything that smells, tastes, feels and rhymes with meat. Even a side of squirrel sounds good on occasion. With that said, I've had some pretty ugly episodes in the bathroom. After my morning coffee my family pretty much bitches, pisses and moans while holding down the button on the can of air freshener for an obnoxious period of time as I unload the prior day's ingestion. Big babies. Now while I'm not the least bit offended by my own smell, I am also a peace loving man, and that is where this fantastic guy gift, The Ritual comes in to save the day. Please, allow me to be clear before you continue reading...if you are in the market for gifts for him...The Ritual is a must have.

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Random Grooming Thoughts

Posted March 22, 2007 2:30 PM

B000C230Na.01-A285Osz7Wvwqmv. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 This just in...A conversation amongst several of my good, red-blooded male friends at lunch today somehow went from the topic of hot females that we noticed at a restaurant to the NCAA games that were set to begin, to who is the better bowler and then we somehow switched gears to discuss how Magic Shaving Powder is a great product to use, um, down there. I guess we've crossed all boundaries, but Carl asked me if when I recommend gifts for men, why I shouldn't suggest that a great gift for her wouldn't be a well groomed hrmh sack.

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Great Gifts For Him - Stay Out Of Jail!

Posted March 20, 2007 2:16 PM

B000Jjgus8.01-A3Unw6H4Ekn71M. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 I suddenly realize that my everyday life is blog-worthy beyond just writing witty gifts for men reviews for your pleasure. After rolling a satisfying 196 in my bowling leauge last night, I was enjoying myself immensely and happily buying drinks for my boys on team Thunderstroke after we thoroughly destroyed the Cheesycakes. I was all smiles on my long drive home too. Now I'm very careful with my drink consumption as it's a long drive from bowling alley to home. I kept myself at a cop safe 72 mph so as to not risk getting pulled over. This strategy has kept me out of trouble for the past three bowling seasons, and again, I'm always careful not to overdo it with the sauce.

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Another St. Patrick's Day Gift Idea(s)

Posted March 14, 2007 2:55 PM

B00005Jm1F.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 You've meditated, gestated, and likely regurgitated ideas for gifts for him for St. Patrick's day, his birthday or whatever holiday is looming close enough for you to seek our guidance. Well, we here at Guyville have a little sumpin sumpin for you. If you're a fan of the site you've likely already seen the Guyville top ten greatest guy movies of all time. We would like to take it a step further and offer the top five best GUY COMEDIES of the last five years. None of them are on our original list, but these five definitely are must haves for the old DVD collection at home.

1. Borat - Cultural Differences For make Benefit...bla bla bla. The title is irrelevant as those five beautiful little letters that spell that wonderful name B-O-R-A-T is all that's necessary.

2. Old School - "Ear Muffs, Jackass!" Which also brings me to think that both Jackass and Jackass 2 deserve honorable mention on this list.

3. Anchorman - The Legend of Ron Burgundy - Oh, this movie just like a fine wine and just keeps getting better and better every year.

4. Wedding Crashers - "I'm gonna go ice my balls and spit up blood." I cried when I saw that scene, but it was one of at least twenty, er, crying scenes in the movie.

5. 40 Year Old Virgin - "know how I know you're gay, you read this entire blog."

As you can see the choices are somewhat crass, lacking class, showing a little ass and absolutely perfect. Don't forget to visit our Guyville Store for more great gifts for men.

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American Idol is Killing Me

Posted March 13, 2007 10:16 PM

B00026L90C.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 Yeah, I'm straight, don't even go there. Oh no you din't! Anyway, I'm sitting here on my derrier watching Sanjaya Malakrap sing on tonight's American Idol, if one could even have the courage to call it singing, and I'm wondering how far this horrific kid can go in this sacred competition. I was supposed to write a guy gift review, but I can't fathom gifts for him while I'm this pissed off. In reality I think there's like three good people in this top twelve. I'm a mediocre singer at best and can belt out The Doors as well as the next drunkard at the Karaoke bar down the street, but this kid Malakrud makes William Hung sound decent for crying out loud!

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Borat - The Guy Gift Must Have

Posted March 11, 2007 6:41 PM

B000Mmmt9G.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 "Hello, my name a Borat. I likey you...I likey sex. Meet my sister she the number 4 prostitute in all of Kazakhstan." We here at Guyville might possibly need to rearrange some things and figure out a way to add this to our Guyville all time top ten guy movies list. Once in a blue moon a film so guycentric and perfect comes along and this is one of those times. If you're looking for a great comedy that broke all of the rules and will likely be fighting lawsuits until your three year-old is a grandparent then this is the guy gift for him.

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St. Patrick's Day Gifts for Him

Posted March 9, 2007 3:25 PM

B0007N33Iq.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 This is as perfect as it gets as far as finding gifts for him goes this St. Patty's day. The Logitech Premium Stereo Headset Microphone fits the bill of being an extremely affordable gift for a not-so-huge as Christmas or a birthday holiday. It also makes me slightly crazy that while I was in a pinch doing some recording work on Garage Band and IMovie I desperately needed a microphone and needed it right away. I hoofed it over to the local Radio Shack and I bought this exact microphone headset and paid the princely sum of $39.99 for it.

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I Like It Black...Like My Cologne

Posted March 6, 2007 11:58 AM

B000Brlwea.01-A3Jht1U3Qmo9Eg. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 Okay, you may be asking yourself, how can we at Guyville possibly recommend a cologne as a potential "gifts for him" when something like a pleasant scent is so clearly subjective? Well, I too would agree with you, normally, but as a gift for my thirty hrmventh birthday, I was given a 4.2 oz bottle of Polo Black and holy cow...it is the finest scented cologne these nostrils have ever taken in.

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The Departed Wins The Big One

Posted February 26, 2007 6:06 PM

B000Nhpcs0.01-A1Iyin71Ujw258. Scthumbzzz V44285247 Aa90 All right, now we're talking people. If you paid any attention to the pre-oscar blog I wrote touting "The Departed" as the movie that probably wouldn't win, but should win, I was pretty much wrong and I couldn't be happier with the results. We heard all sorts of reasons as to why The Departed couldn't win simply because it wasn't as good as "Good Fellas" but the bottom line was, it was a great, film with a phenomenal cast and it was molded together by one of the best directors of our time. Kudos to Marty on his big win. He was beaming all night, and you could just feel it coming when his long time editor took Oscar home earlier in the evening and he had tears streaming down his cheeks.

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Gadgets For Men

Posted February 25, 2007 4:50 PM

B000G1Il3Q.01-A35D5On3677H9N. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 Here is a must have gadget gift for your guy at home. IPod, meet car, car meet charger, charger meet car and IPod. Now you can enjoy listening to your IPod in your car without getting those pesky tickets for having your ear-phones in. This awesome 3 and 1 Car Kit is a charger and an FM Transmitter with built in IPod holder. Simply plug the FM transmitter into the headphone jack of your mp3 player, tune your car stereo to the clearest FM frequency and listen to your personal collection of tunes. Okay, this is just a must have in the category of gifts for men. Normally it's around $70 bucks, which is a small price to pay to get your favorite music available and at your beck and call, but as of right now it's less than half that, currently on sale for only $27.99.

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And the Winner Is...

Posted February 24, 2007 7:18 AM

Images-2 Have you seen every single film that is up for best picture this year? What's that? You missed "Letters From Iwo Jima?" You didn't get out to see "Babel" or "The Queen" despite your best intentions? I bet you saw "The Departed" though didn't you? Of course you did. Why is that you suddenly ask yourself? It's because you're a red-blooded, scotch drinking, strip club frequenting guy. Own it, pal! You are what you are and ain't nobody can take that away from you. Sorry, I slip into Apollo Creed tones often when I want to express a point. The truth is, I don't think that "The Departed" is going to necessarily win. I just bring up the conversation because I know that seems to be the film that everyone really made a point to see. It doesn't mean it's the best, it just means it's Guyville's favorite.

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Impotence Ads Under Fire

Posted February 22, 2007 8:12 PM

Mk-Ai565 Edads 20070215201416 Is it inappropriate to request a dozen bottles of Viagra when being asked what would be deemed among the more perfect "gifts for men?" Well, whether it's appropriate or not, the drug makers are coming under fire for running their suggestive commercials during childrens' programming and other inappropriate time slots. The thing that I find really funny is that these ads seem to be starring younger and younger people. Look at the couple in the above picture, for example. This is a newer commercial for Viagra, the market leader in EDE or what I like to call erectile dysfunction ecstasy.

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Valentine's Day Gift Review

Posted February 12, 2007 8:26 PM

B0009Vxam0.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 The day is coming and it's coming fast and furious, ladies. With that in mind, we come to you bearing ideas for gifts for him that we think will dazzle you. Let's first start with one of the great gifts for men of all ages, shapes and sizes, this Professional Poker Set. It's not only top-of-the-line as far as quality, but it can also be personalized. Not a bad start. For the big spenders in the group, we have a great deal on a high quality Plasma TV. Let's be honest...a plasma is every man's dream. If you can come up with the Benji's, he'll be with you for life (that's a good thing, right?)

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Gifts For Him for Valentine's Day

Posted February 12, 2007 8:03 PM

B000Ige0Pw.01. Aa280 Sclzzzzzzz Nothing says I love you quite like a pair of soft, new boxers that say, "I love you" on them. In a pinch to find the right gifts for him and time is a wasting? Then get on your horse and give him a guy gift that will make him feel sexy and comfortable every time he slips on his Intimo Men's Boxers. Finding the right gifts for men can be an agonizing task and as each day passes, it doesn't get any easier.

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Anna Nicole - The End of Present Day's Marilyn Monroe

Posted February 10, 2007 4:56 PM

09Smith190.1 There's just something so unsettling and sad about her being gone that it almost doesn't feel right. Sure we made fun of her when she was thin and crazy and married to that hundred year-old guy. Of course we poked fun at her while watching her train wreck of a reality show. We laughed our asses off at her when she was 200 pounds and tried to make it with some loser in the bathroom on the Howard Stern show. But there was something innocent and sweet about her too. She was our present day Marilyn Monroe. She was apple pie and the all American girl that we had a crush on despite her looniness. I think deep down we all wanted to take her by the hand and show her the light. We wanted to save her somehow - as if somehow we had the answers for her and that if we could just get her away from it all we could show her the sane side of life.

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Mmm, Squirrel - The Other Other White Meat

Posted January 29, 2007 7:22 PM

Images Associated Press: Trenton, N.J. (AP) A warning has been issued to the residents of Ringwood, New Jersey to watch their consumption of squirrel meat as they could be contaminated with lead. A lead contaminated squirrel was apparently found about two months ago and it prompted letters to go out to residents that eating squirrels more than twice per week could prove harmful to your health. Children and pregnant women should consume squirrel even less. This prompts me to ask a curious and burning question...who in the heck eats squirrel?! I can understand looking at a bunny and thinking, damn, he looks like he might be kind of tasty, but who in their right mind looks at a squirrel and says, man, I gotta have me some squirrel at least three times a week or I'll go out of my mind? We like to suggest gifts for men, but this one has us scratching our heads.

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Valentines Day Gifts

Posted January 24, 2007 2:35 PM

B0007Wbee2.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 V1124474373 The history of Valentine's Day is a little vague, but here is what we know, or think we know...Valentine was likely a priest who lived and served in the third century in Rome. Once the Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made a better choice as soldiers than those who were married, he outlawed marriage for young men. Valentine, smelling an injustice, performed marriages in private so that young lovers could be together properly. Ultimately, Valentine was found out and put to death. Not so great as far as gifts for him went that particular year.

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I'll Drink To That

Posted January 21, 2007 9:26 PM

Chr Barbook How many times have you planned a party, bought the beer, bought the wine, purchased the food and wondered what alcohol you should get to set the party apart from all others? Or worse than that, you've bought the vodka and the bourbon, but you have no idea what to mix them with. You can jump online and Google a Mojito recipe, but ten sites will give you ten different recipes, and who really has time to try them all to see which one is correct? If only there was a website that posted not only hundreds and hundreds of drink recipes, but also filmed the bartender making them right before our very eyes. Now that would be something to tune in to.

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Stop Global Warming

Posted January 21, 2007 11:47 AM

B000Cphaag.01. Sclzzzzzzz Sl210 V1134511384 Okay, so we're not a political site, we're not a scientific site, we're not the voice of reason site, in fact, we're not much more than an entertaining product review site specifically for gifts for him. However, I'm on a tear after watching a DVD of "An Inconvenient Truth" a few weeks ago. The day after I watched it I read an article that a piece of a glacier larger than Manhattan had just broken off and was creating a big fear among experts that the fast moving piece of ice could wreak havoc with the oil drilling rigs that might come into it's path.

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Television Coming To The Web

Posted January 10, 2007 4:17 AM

B00026L9Ra.01-A18Uczvdsumltv. Aa90 Scthumbzzz This just in...Extra Extra, read all about it...Coming soon to computers everywhere. As reported in the Wall Street Journal, several television networks are hoping to undercut the role of cable and satellite companies by bringing their programs to the web. Amongst the companies paving the way are Nickelodeon, Showtime and Starz, reportedly having reached agreements with Microsoft to help make web meet TV. Talk about pure manna from heaven - these are the little gifts that men of all shapes and ages can embrace. Imagine, "Honey, bring me my computer and a piece of cake, I'm watching reruns!"

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Graphic Novels - The Gift That Keeps Giving

Posted January 6, 2007 4:58 PM

cowboys and aliens

Whatever happened to the great comic books and graphic novels that meant so much to us as kids? Did they go away, or did we just outgrow them? The reality is comics have never left, and though they've gone through many manifestations throughout the years, and continue to do so with mobile media, video ipods and web comics, they are here to stay. I recently got my mitts on the new "Cowboys & Aliens" graphic novel published by Platinum Studios and immediately was reminded why so many of our best feature films are born from comics.

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New Years Resolutions - Guy Style

Posted December 31, 2006 5:37 PM

Happy New Year

Here is a short list of New Years Resolutions that every guy can get behind. I believe that resolutions should be small gifts to ourselves that no one in the world can give us but, well...ourselves. The goals shouldn't be too lofty, or too hard, or put too much pressure on us to succeed should we fail, that way the disappointment won't depress us. The resolutions should be meaningful so we focus on getting them accomplished, yet in no way should the effort be more difficult than the reward. That said, here is what I'm focusing on doing in 2007.

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Donald Rumsfeld Is In My Dreams

Posted December 29, 2006 2:57 PM

Rumsfeld

And he hates me. I need some help with dream analysis, folks: I had a nightmare last night that I was back in high school or maybe college (or law school, the scene of many real-life nightmares for me), prepping for a standardized test. I went up to the professor to get my test form and it was, guess who, the Rummy himself. I got a test form from him, went back to my desk to take the test, and then realized that it was someone else's form. Not only that, but they'd already done the test! So, I brought it back up to him and asked for my form instead. He peered at me with those beady little eyes, took the old, used form, and then told me I already had mine. I went back to my desk (again) and searched everywhere.

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Gifts For Guys With Imagination

Posted December 29, 2006 12:19 PM

 

amexcard

Finding the proper gift for the important men in our lives that already have everything known to mankind is a fairly common problem that many of us face. We would gladly buy him a leather bra for his Ferrari, but alas he already owns three. We'd be first in line to buy him that Nintendo Wii, but he already made a few calls and got it and the PS3 before anyone else in the Northern Hemisphere. It would seem that the perfect gift for this resourceful and difficult to buy for fellow, would be a pre-paid Visa, MasterCard or AMEX. Anyone on the planet can use it to buy just about anything, so what would be the problem?

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ACURA RDX - 240 Turbo Charged Horses

Posted December 23, 2006 12:11 PM

RDXWe welcomed a new addition to the household last week. She is a beauty too. She is soft and smooth and brand spanking new. She has a throaty laugh, a wicked temper and like most women, likes to be in charge. When my wife first inquired about the new Acura RDX (yes it's to be her car), I thought, man that's a chick car all the way. Why not just throw in the towel and get a Volkswagon Cabrio. The lines of the RDX are sleek, yet somehow appealing to the target audience of 30 to 35 year-old female, small family demographic.

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Last Minute Shopping – Guy Style

Posted December 19, 2006 8:46 AM

Ah, yes, the holidays are here and Christmas, Chanukah and Kwanzaa wouldn’t be what they are without some last minute shopping chaos. If you’re like most guys, it’s conceivable that you have not even begun your holiday shopping yet. You know the lines at the mall are going to be out the door for the next week. You are acutely aware that you have to work every day until Christmas Eve too. “Big deal”, you think to yourself, “I manage to get it done every year and this year will be no different.” We here at Guyville would like to remind you that buying a three-pound bag of candy canes and a cheesy card at the local grocery store probably doesn’t go over all that well with your loved ones. Even that bottle of Cold Duck likely doesn’t impress them anymore. So if you’re stuck on coming up with a great, versatile and easy to shop for gift that absolutely everyone will love, try an Amazon Gift Certificate.

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Winning is For Losers

Posted December 17, 2006 9:06 PM

Chris Daughtry didn't need to win American Idol to get noticed. Cream always rises to the top and though he was always a fan favorite and while we cringed when he was ousted and outlasted by Elliot Yamin, we always somehow knew he'd find his way back to the top. While it seems hard to believe that he turned down an offer to be the front man for an already successful band, Fuel, Daughtry will ultimately have the last laugh.

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Buy - Sell - Trade - Tag It!

Posted December 13, 2006 6:07 PM

itaggit

No, it's not the recycler, but cutting edge new website, itaggit will thrill and excite collectors of all things big and small. From the high-end hobbyist and his priceless special edition GI Joe collection to the two-cent trinket collector, Itaggit gives users the ability to inventory their collections and manage them all while either publishing them to other itaggit users or keeping them private.

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Featured Product of the Week: Philips Norelco on the 'Cutting Edge' of Shaving

Posted December 12, 2006 1:37 PM

Philips Norelco Bodygroom

I have no idea what took the rest of the shaving world so long to create a product like the Philips Noreclo Bodygroomâ„¢. Let's face it, our women have been insisting on metro-sexualizing all of us for years, and keeping all parts of our extremities, torso and, er, twig and berries nice, clean and tight is part of the deal. I, actually, have been grooming since the tender age of eighteen as I turn into a shag carpet as each full moon approaches, or roughly once a month if I don't tackle the arduous task of doing a full body grooming.

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"Don't Debate, Exfoliate"

Posted December 10, 2006 1:38 PM

Spin Spa

Yes, we here at Guyville pride ourselves on our abilities to let men be guys. We can recommend trickle chargers for your ATV's, boats and motorcycles, we can talk about the top ten best macho guy movies out there as well as the top ten kick ass albums of all time, but we also have a sensitive side too. For this we'd like to talk about a great guy gift that even if you're a man's man, like me, might never think about or talk about and likely wouldn't buy unless you had an ulterior motive...like using it on your girlfriend, which, by the way, ain't a bad idea.

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The LA Auto Show - Christmas Comes Early

Posted December 9, 2006 11:32 PM

auto

The holidays wouldn't be the holidays without the Los Angeles Auto Show. This year there were more than 35 world and North American debuts. This is an unprecedented amount of new vehicles for a single show and with few exceptions, every manufacturer brought their A-game. We learned a lot at this show. For instance the Lotus cars are so teeny tiny that up close and personal they look more like go-carts than cars. I watched a six-foot plus two hundred and something pound dude try to get into the hard top Exige S and I have never laughed harder.

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English - The Forgotten Language

Posted December 7, 2006 9:08 AM

alpha

After we chewed up and spit out Michael Richards for his blatant and terrifying racist meltdown, we find ourselves wanting to delicately point out that we've noticed that English, the language of our country for the past several hundred years seems to be dwindling away as the melting pot of our country grows larger. Personally, I love interracial relationships and the possibility that if we are all diluted enough a few hundred years from now, racism will be impossible. I'm also half Russian Jew and half Armenian, a rare combination of two holocaust-surviving families, yet I still thought Borat was hilarious, so clearly I’m not supersensitive. That said, it appears that more and more instances are occurring – and perhaps it’s mostly a California thing – that nobody speaks English anymore. I had the cable guy come over here yesterday and I said, "I’d like the cable box to go over there, please." He looked at me as if I was absolutely insane. "I not understandy." He told me. I couldn’t be any clearer, "Put cable box there." Again I got that baffled look. This man spoke not a word of English. I was reminded of Sam Kinison at the 7-11. "Marlboro! Smokey smokey! You don’t speak English had you get the f’ng job?!" Come on, people, if you’re going to live here, at least try to learn some of the language. After I took an hour and some pencil markings to explain where to put the box, you should have seen his face when I asked him for a channel lineup card. I’ll I can tell you is that the look on his face was priceless. I’ve never seen so many lines on a forehead before. "A gwat?!" he asked irritated. I never knew there was a ‘y’ at the end of understand and a ‘g’ before the word ‘what.’ For this hard-working gentleman and many others like him, we’d like to recommend a fabulous book that would be a great guy gift for the non-English speaking man. We love that you’re here, now let’s all get on the same communication page, and it will be bliss.

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Gator Attacks Naked Man on Crack

Posted December 1, 2006 11:31 AM

gator

CBS news - Lakeland, Florida reported that a naked, 45 year-old man was rescued by four sheriff's deputies after being attacked and dragged into a lake on Wednesday. We at Guyville were initially unsure as to whether the man was on crack, or if he'd been bitten on his rear end as the headline read, "Gator Attacks Naked Man on Crack." He must have been high on crack, because how in the world could he survive an attack from a twelve foot alligator with one arm broken, another arm torn off, save for a single ligament, and both legs chomped on?

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All I Want For Christmas is a Plasma TV

Posted November 25, 2006 4:29 PM

Panasonic TH-42 Plasma HDTV

Gone are the days when those crystal clear gorgeous plasma TV’s cost the same as a sturdy three year-old Toyota with fewer than 70,000 miles on it. Plasma’s, LCD’s and DLP’s were the future and the future is now. Over the past two years we’ve been noticing that great quality picture plasma’s have been coming way down in price. We’ve seen some come down as far as the fifteen hundred dollar range for 42 inch screens. In the not-so-old days, Mitsubishi and Sony were the standard for best picture quality in the world of TV. That’s not the case any longer.

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Michael Richards Needs Help!

Posted November 24, 2006 4:24 PM

Kramer

Holy cow, I know everyone has been talking about this for days now, but that kooky, crazy loveable Cosmo Kramer just unveiled a side of him that no one wanted to see. Was he high? Literally, not figuratively, I have to ask the question…was the man high?

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The Spirit of Gaming

Posted November 22, 2006 1:18 PM

gaming

The E3 was quite an experience with mile long lines lasting for hours for folks just to be able to sneak a peek at the newest stars coming out for the holidays, Play Station 3, the Nintendo Wii, and the Xbox 360. There are countless blogs and opinions out there that will inform you that the Wii’s motion control sensing capability is better than the Playstation’s, which is why Sony only had one playable unit on the floor. The Wiimote is clearly the more advanced unit – at least during this beta test phase, however where they end up during actual distribution is still up for grabs. You’ll also likely hear that the PS3’s and the XBOX360’s graphics blow the Wii’s out of the water.

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Turn Your Vinyl Into a CD!

Posted November 21, 2006 3:59 PM

Van Halen

Don’t throw away those awesome vinyl collections! Do you have a milk crate full of awesome records from the seventies and eighties and you’re thinking about dumping them at your next garage sale for fifty cents a record? Don’t do it, man! Nothing is better than technology and the Ion Turntable with USB connection is an incredible device that will convert your awesome record collection into any CD or MP3 format and will work nicely with your MAC or PC or anything that has a USB connection. It even includes Audacity software for cleaning and restoring that awesome vinyl quality sound.

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Bald Isn’t Beautiful – It Sucks!

Posted November 17, 2006 5:31 PM

couple

Get your hair back, man! I started going bald at the tender age of sixteen and had to endure the wicked name calling of ‘bald bastard’ from my so-called friends as a junior in high school. I still have nightmares from those insensitive jack holes, but I was proactive and did something about it. I got a prescription for two percent Rogaine and happily forked over the fifty bucks a month that it used to cost because I believed in my heart that it would work for me.

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Have You Seen My Schwetty Balls?

Posted November 14, 2006 11:34 PM

Schwetty Balls

Schwetty balls is the perfect gift for a guy who worships golf, but understands the game and all of the humor surrounding it. We golfers take the game so seriously, yet it truly is just a walk around a lovely park spoiled by a little white ball.

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Death To Maisy Mouse!

Posted November 13, 2006 6:09 PM

Maisy Mouse

This is a plea for help for all Guyville guys out there who have kids under the age of five. Have you spent countless hours watching these ridiculous morning cartoons with your chitlins while BCS teams are going head to head? Have you tried to sneak in a quick channel change only to hear your young ‘un scream her head off in protest?

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Pedometers – Not Just For Girls Anymore

Posted November 11, 2006 6:47 PM

Omron HJ112 Premium Pedometer

Let’s face it, if you were to wear a pedometer, this would be the one to wear with the to ability display time, aerobic steps, distance in miles and most importantly, the Omron HJ112 Premium Pedometer also has the ability to track your calories and fat grams burned.

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Power Up!

Posted October 27, 2006 7:09 AM

Xantrex 851-0400 XPower 400 Plus Compact Inverter

Attention! Attention! This is a genuine Guyville giddy moment. There are certain products that we like to talk about and recommend and there are certain products that just don't make the grade. Occasionally, however, we feel it necessary to grab the bull (that's you, the reader) by the horns (that's a metaphorical term, since you don't have horns) and say, "You have got to check this item out!" This is one of those times.

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Space the Final Frontier

Posted October 25, 2006 5:50 PM

Swiss Army Classic SD + Fisher Space Pen Set

Everyone has those pinnacle moments of monumental importance when they need to jot down something and there is not a second to spare. You grab the first and only pen within eyesight range. Just as they're giving you that all important billion-dollar sweepstakes prize confirmation number...your pen dies!

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Happy Hour Every Day

Posted October 18, 2006 1:03 PM

Personalized Vintage Irish Pub Sign Personalized Vintage Irish Pub Sign

Forget about the singing bass signs that irritate the heck out of you, if you are looking to get great gifts for men this holiday season, then look no further than the Personalized Vintage Irish Pub Sign this year. Everyone either has a full bar, a half bar or a closet that holds liquor (for medicinal purposes) and by golly those all important guy havens must be identified! Imagine, your woman wants to put vases with flowers and a bowl of fruit to 'dress up' your bar area. Well, if you have your personalized sign above your precious liquids, she would know that to decorate your manly bar, that is clearly marked by your pub sign, with your first and last name as well as the year your bar was established, plus the all important 'proprietor' title on it, she would know not to pollute your guy-ville atmosphere with apples and flowers, wouldn't she? Of course she would. This area of the house is strictly off limits to anyone but you - and of course your special crapper - but that goes without saying. So spread some holiday cheer this season and get a unique guy gift that says, "Hey, you're a guy...and I know that. That is why I call you 'ma boy, dude, homie, brotha from anotha motha, and my mo fo.'" And if buying gifts for guys isn't your thing, then don't think twice, we'll personalize it for your girl. Chicks love beer too...and cosmos, and apple martinis, and some even like Wild Turkey 101. Now that's my kind of girl.

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Top 10 Guyville Albums - Volume I

Posted October 11, 2006 1:46 PM

van halen1.jpg
Here are the rules: No best of albums here. We’re looking for bands that came, saw, kicked ass and created sheer brilliance in one album. Everything is subjective too, so clearly this could be a top 100 list and anyone could make an argument for or against any of these choices.

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Top 10 Guyville Movies

Posted October 4, 2006 3:02 PM

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It's probably not fair to attempt a top ten list of the best guy movies ever made, but knowing how hard it is to find the perfect gift for guys, we can think of nothing better than starting a collection of the best testosterone inducing cinematic thrill rides for the buds that we love.

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Justin Timberlake Rules!

Posted September 27, 2006 2:14 PM

justin.jpg Yes, manly men, Justin Timberlake's new album, Future Sex/Love Sounds is like a throwback to when Prince was cool to listen to in the eighties. I'm talking Purple Rain and 1999 Prince, not the weird 'symbol' Prince.

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Not Just Any Whine Opener

Posted September 26, 2006 11:23 AM

wineopen2.jpg Why are those fancy wine openers such great gifts for guys? This particular wine accessory gift set being a unique and cool gift as it adds personalization as an added touch.

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Personalization Goes To New Heights

Posted September 20, 2006 4:09 AM

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This is pure genius. You know we guys here at Guyville generally rave about personalized gifts. Nothing says, “I love myself” more than a bunch of stuff with our own names on it.

Get enough of it together in the same house and pretty soon we begin to refer to ourselves in the third person. “Joey Johnson wants to get some beer from his Joey Johnson Personalized Beer Stein in Joey Johnson’s kitchen. Joey Johnson is gonna be right back.”

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Leather Coasters - Go Ringless!

Posted September 14, 2006 12:33 PM

leather coasters Why are we still not accustomed to putting a coaster down on that beautiful mahogany table every time we set our drink down? It’s baffling to me. Somebody finally has the decency to invite you over to their house and you think to wipe your feet before entering, you take the time to hang your coat on the coat rack, then you take your sweaty, dripping Corona and set it down on the host’s four thousand dollar antique table without using a coaster!

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Double Deluxe Duffle

Posted September 13, 2006 5:16 PM

dbag.jpg Guys and duffle bags can be a tricky thing. Every store in the world offers their version of what they think we, as guys would want to have included in the bag. To be fair, they usually get some of the important stuff right like the shoulder strap, the nifty side pockets, and a few other features.

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Meet Meat at Your Door

Posted September 12, 2006 5:46 PM

filet.jpg As a product reviewer I get many samples and gadgets and gift items sent to me to play with, try out, explore and yes, occasionally, eat. I have to admit I was feeling a bit giddy when I opened my dry ice packed Styrofoam cooler packed with several different steaks sent courtesy of the Great West Cattle Company (GWCC).

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Personalized Lock-Back Knife

Posted August 31, 2006 10:45 AM

How can you go wrong gifting a knife set to your closest buddy? In concept, you really can't go wrong, but if you execute poorly and try to get skimpy by gifting him a knife that was manufactured in some third world country then I bet the following scenario will ensue.

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The Art of Shaving - Groomsmen Kit

Posted August 29, 2006 2:38 PM

mens-shaving-kit.jpg I hate shaving…myself that is. Shaving others, well, I’ll spare you those details. The Art of Shaving – Groomsmen Kit touts itself as being the Rolls Royce of shaving products. There are four steps to mastering the art of the shave.

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How to Fix a Clogged Toilet

Posted August 29, 2006 1:45 PM

Everyone's been there. At your buddy / girlfriend's house. Just a tad too much paper, and the next thing you know, you're whimpering "no!! please!!" as the waters rise like the mighty Mississippi during the rainy season (less picturesque, though). Don't panic. Most bathrooms (especially in family homes) are equipped with everything you'll need to emerge with pride intact.

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How to Make a Toast

Posted August 29, 2006 1:44 PM

At some point during your life you'll have to make a toast. A toast is defined as "something in honor in which persons usually drink." It's also defined as "sliced bread browned on both sides by heat." But let's stick with the first one. (ed. Note: we do not cover 'how to make toast' here)

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How do I find good quotes to use for a toast?

Posted August 29, 2006 1:38 PM

Marriage

Marriage is a three ring circus: engagement ring, wedding ring, and suffering.
- Anonymous

Marriage is like a bank account. You put it in, you take it out, you lose interest.
- Irwin Corey

There is nothing nobler or more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.
- Homer, Odyssey, ninth century B.C.

Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice of partner.
- Amy Bloom

A good marriage is like a casserole, only those responsible for it really know what goes in it.
- Anonymous

I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry.
- Rita Rudner

Marriage is bliss. Ignorance is bliss. Ergo...
- Anonymous

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How To Put Together a Resume

Posted August 29, 2006 1:36 PM

You've probably heard the phrase "get a job" a good few thousand times since being able to remember words in your cerebral cortex. And now the time has arrived. You need a job (one where you're not on a lawn mower or making signs on cardboard boxes). The first component of the job search is the resume, a succinct summation of your life and work experience. Having a great education and work history helps, but presentation is everything. A crisp, tight, well-organized list of your favorite swimsuits will go farther than a sloppy page full of 20 years experience.

Your resume should include the following information:

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Guyville Facts of the day - Page 1

Posted August 29, 2006 1:26 PM

1. Harrison Ford has been in 8 of the Top 50 Grossing Movies Ever, totaling 2.03 billion dollars.

2. 'New car smell' is caused by phtylates, a plastic softener used in car upholstery

3. 60% of all babies are named after a relative.

4. The world's smallest country is Vatican City, which is 17 square miles.

5. A guy's life expectancy is estimated at 74. In 1900, it was 46.

6. 9% of American households had TVs in 1950. Today it is above 98%.

7. The sailfish is the fastest animal in water, which can travel at speeds up to 68 mph.

8. In 1921 there were 30,456 banks in the United States. In 1999, there were 8,675.

9. The United States has more prisoners than any other country with over 1.6 million. Russia is second with just over 1 million.

10. The hottest day ever was in Libya, recorded at 136 degrees Fahrenheit.

11. In 1998, South Carolinians scored lowest on the math SAT, averaging a score or 470.

12. An American will produce over 1,600 pounds of waste a year.

13. Chop suey was invented in 1896.

14. A gallon of water weighs 8.3 pounds. A gallon of gasoline weighs 5.8 pounds.

15. Women blink twice as much as men.

16. Impotence is grounds for divorce in 24 U.S. states.

17. Selling chewing gum in Singapore is illegal.

18. Roughly 2.3 Million Americans are on vacation every week.

19. Gabriel the Archangel is the patron saint of television.

20. St. Fiacre is the patron saint of cab drivers

21. Czechs drink more beer than any other nation, roughly 358 bottles of beer a year.

22. The highest toll paid for the Panama Canal was $141,344. It was for the cruise ship The Crown Princess.

23. Sugar Free Mr. Pibb has the highest amount of caffeine out of all sodas, even more than Mountain Dew.

24. Woodrow Wilson appeared on the $100,000 bill, which hasn't been printed since 1934.

25. James Garfield, Herbert Hoover, Harry Truman, Gerald Ford, Ronald Reagan, George Bush and Bill Clinton were all left-handed.

25 more.....

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How to Become a Movie Star

Posted August 29, 2006 11:41 AM

On the side of the telephone booth, on the cover of People and Premiere, on "Friends" and on the commercials during "Friends," there they are: the golden boys and girls of Hollywood. We all hear about them, their lives, their favorite foods and when they get parking tickets. Glitz, glamour, [insert other clichés here]. The one problem is although these 7-figure movie dealers are high profile, the large majority of actors stay not only off the radar, but just plain off. According to SAG (the Screen Actors Guild, the union all movie/television actors must join), in 1996, 85% of the 90,000 actors in SAG earned less than $5,000. That's $96 a week, before taxes. And a little more than ¼ of SAG members earned nothing under SAG contracts. So before you pack a bag and head to Tinseltown, let's get realistic.

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Shoe Care Kit - 7 piece

Posted August 29, 2006 11:35 AM

shoecarekit.jpg What's in a shoe care kit? A brush and a tub of greasy goo that somehow miraculously shines your scuffed up leather shoes? Some products you can't wait to review and then there's a product like this that you kind of put in the back of the closet and say, "I'll get to it at some point." I love it when I'm pleasantly surprised. It doesn't occur too often, but I always chuckle when it does happen. I waited until I actually had a few pair of my favorite dress shoes that were looking a little worse for wear. I decided to blow the dust off of all my old shoes and put this snazzy looking 7-piece shoe care kit to the test.

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Professional Poker Set

Posted August 29, 2006 11:34 AM

poker.jpg When given the call to review this top-of-the-line Professional Poker Set I didn't have to think too long or hard about the task. "I'm on the job!" I exclaimed, probably a bit too eager. Let's face it. Whisky, a keg, nachos, cigars, eight of my best pals and a dozen pizzas, who wouldn't want to review this product.

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Dalvey Telescopic Cup

Posted August 29, 2006 11:29 AM

Occasionally we run across a great 'guy' product that we absolutely have to discuss. The Dalvey Telescopic Cup warrants just such attention. At first casual glance a guy may notice the craftsmanship that is high end and attractive and well…just shiny and cool as is Dalvey's trademark, but upon closer inspection a mind can run wild at the versatility of what a retractable telescopic cup like this might be capable of.

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Dalvey Money Clip/Credit Card Wallet

Posted August 29, 2006 11:03 AM

cardandmoneyclip.jpg Ever get weird, unexplained back pain for no apparent reason? I used to, and it drove me crazy. Once I was on a long drive and the pain reoccurred and out of frustration a moment of clarity hit me. I reached into my back pocket and pulled out my ridiculously fat wallet. Suddenly it all made sense. My hips were cock-eyed because I wasn't sitting down squarely on my cushion. Once I pulled it out, I felt immediate relief when my butt cheeks were planted firmly in my seat. The worst place in the world to put a big, fat wallet is in your back pocket. What could possibly be a solution to this problem, you ask? The Dalvey Money Clip/Credit Card Wallet is a great place to start.

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Personalized Golf Academy Sign

Posted August 29, 2006 11:01 AM

perspubsign_golfacademy.jpg Do you have a buddy who is the 'golf guy?' Come on, we all know him. He's the guy that drops $500 on a single round at Pebble Beach when he's been unemployed for six months, and no, that doesn't include the hotel. Hell, it doesn't even include a cart or a hot dog! The golf guy is a person who knows no boundaries when it comes to the game. He always has a limitless budget and often times will choose a round of golf over sex. Actually he'll do the latter nine times out of ten. He's quick to give lessons on the fly to any beginner who expresses the least bit of interest in the sport. For this all around impassioned player of the greatest game in his universe, you have to gift him the Personalized Golf Academy Sign.

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Frazier Leather Valet Tray

Posted August 29, 2006 10:54 AM

GC263.jpg Upon simple first glance of this Leather Valet Tray one might think, eh, what's the big deal? Yeah, it looks pretty cool and because it's black leather it blends nicely with any furniture no matter what the color. While that is a nice aspect I have to always ask myself, what is the real usable benefit to a product?

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