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Would You Rather Be Dead or Have Laser Lithotripsy?

Would You Rather Be Dead or Have Laser Lithotripsy?

We've all heard the horror stories about the pain of a kidney stone, but yesterday morning's anecdote on the Howard Stern Show about kidney stones will have you crying for your Mommy louder than the actors in Saving Private Ryan.

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If you weren't listening to Stern yesterday, they were discussing Gary Dell'Abate's recent issue with a kidney stone. Normally, a kidney stone can be made to pass through your urine easily. But this isn't working for Dell'Abate's kidney 'blockage'. His kidney stone is so big - and lodged so far up into his urinary tract - that doctors are going to have to carry out some advanced procedures to clear Baba Booey's pee pipes.

The latest medical procedure for getting those pesky stones out of your system is by using ultrasound to break them up. The ultrasound is able to blast out the stone so it safely passes through the tract. This is an amazing development in science because it means no invasive surgery!

But don't start singing praises for science just yet. Apparently, the ultrasound "blasting" is effective around 60% of the time. If it's not, Dell'Abate has to undergo some serious surgery. The surgery is known as Laser Lithotripsy - and trust me guys - the name doesn't do it justice.

In Laser Lithotripsy, a doctor inserts a device up into your pee hole, passing it all the way up to your ureter. Now, this little tidbit is worth going into a little more detail. The ureter connects your kidneys with your bladder. In other words, it's located deep inside of your body. And - once again - how does your surgeon get to it? That's right, by sticking a metal pole all the way up your urethra - or in Howard Stern speak - your pee hole.

The surgery shatters the kidney stone causing the blockage by directing lasers at it. The patient is then saved from imminent death due to kidney failure. Great, except the patient also has to have a long stick thrust up inside of their penis.

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The story begs the question: Is there not a better way? So here on GuyVille, we're asking you the ultimate Would You Rather:

Would you rather have Laser Lithotripsy or die of kidney failure? It's a tough one, we know, so give yourself some time to think about it.

Since we're on the subject of pain, and while you ponder this 'would you rather' question, check out our Welded Heatbacker Steak Brand. This metal branding device will sear your authority into all that you cook as grillmaster this summer!



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